OhmigodthatwassoboringI'mgoingtokillmyself
I have to give a presentation on satellite phones tomorrow, how the fuck do I stretch 'they're just like mobile phones, but with a bigger antenna' out to a 30 minute powerpoint lecture?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 9:56, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Fill it with buzzwords!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 9:57, Reply)

Throw in a danger wank at minute 13.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 9:57, Reply)

You can explain them how to use mobile phones
Probably most of them don't know.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 9:57, Reply)

If they don't know how to use a mobile phone they should be in some assisted care programme
I might just accidentally slip Hitlercock in as one of the slides
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:02, Reply)

It'll be a good way to break the ice
Maybe some dead kittens too?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:03, Reply)

You could fill it with technical bollocks
Like the frequency bands used, digital compression methods, encryption, power, handshaking protocols etc. I don't know about satellite phones - maybe they use the same transmission protocols as standard GSM, but who cares? Rattle it all off anyway.

Their eyes will glaze over, and Hitlercock will be unnoticed.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:10, Reply)

just keep saying
Am I right? Eh? Eh?

and elbow them until they agree. Then spend the next 27 minutes arguing over who gets which Krispy Kreme donut.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 9:58, Reply)

Play songs with the word satellite in them.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:00, Reply)

The best I can come up with right now is 'radar love'
Are there any songs with satellite in them?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:03, Reply)

www.google.co.uk/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rlz=1T4SUNC_enGB383GB383&q=satellite+songs+lyrics
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:04, Reply)

Oh, f**k you

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Why?
I was helping you.

Unless you mean fucking me in a good way, in which case, thank you, I think.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:13, Reply)

It doesn't matter who I fuck
It always end badly
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:15, Reply)

Why have you put asterix instead of typing the full word?

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:14, Reply)

She's a delicate chiquita, and I didn't want to offend
Also, Family Guy reference
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:19, Reply)

Sleeping satellite, Satellite of love

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:06, Reply)

And...
"I saw two shooting stars last night
I wished on them, but they were only satellites
It's wrong to wish on space hardware
I wish, I wish you cared"
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 11:25, Reply)

Death via satellite
by TheSTART (has Aimee Echo, formerly from Human Waste Project and my teenage sexual fantasies)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:06, Reply)

There's one by ELO that springs to mind.
Here is the news.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Now I need to watch The Day Today

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Coming to you every hour, on the hour

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:08, Reply)

I have that feeling several times a day.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:14, Reply)

Dave Matthews band has got one.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:10, Reply)

A shit album?
Surely more than one.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:22, Reply)

Draw pictures!
Orbits and stuff. Extra marks if you can make them so suggestive someone does a snort.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:02, Reply)

I won't be able to beat the Geo-synchronous CDC from the other day
and it's on the use of the phones themselves, rather than anything to do with the satellites
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:07, Reply)

ELO strikes again
Calling America.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:11, Reply)

use lots of charts they don't understand & then talk them through them

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:05, Reply)

interpretative dance
should spin it out a bit
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Or just use the medium of mime.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 10:23, Reply)