If you kill his frumpy Mrs
he could be here ALL THE TIME
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:03, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

but is that what you really want?
24h al?
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:05, Reply)

I secretly miss him and want to rekindle our sexual relationship
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:08, Reply)

We know
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

but he'll take ages to write a response
with only one hand
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:07, Reply)

...and it will be some long-winded diatribe
about how wrong everybody else is
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:11, Reply)

She can't be frumpy or else he would have married me.
Oh hang on, that merkin cunt left me for a frumpy woman.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:07, Reply)

Haha!
That's what I like to see! Real bitterness and venom about personal stuff.
Al's lucky for what he got, I'd have bet my left nipple on him dying alone
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:09, Reply)

: )

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:10, Reply)

Who? and who? I don't know this story.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:10, Reply)

Old news.

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:11, Reply)

Please elaborate.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:17, Reply)

No.
Done and dusted.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:17, Reply)

You're so mean.
One day, I'll get you drunk and prise the story from you.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:27, Reply)

It really isn't that interesting.
Everyone on here will agree.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Fair does. I still look forward to getting you drunk.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:38, Reply)

haha!

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:38, Reply)

BGB and some bloke called Loon something or other
he was pretty dull really, I don't think anyone misses him very much
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:11, Reply)

ooops
see below
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:19, Reply)

*bites fist*
Go on I can't resist. I understand he hurt you but I quite like The Resident Loon (I like both of you), he was the first b3tan I actually spoke to in real life and he quickly put me at ease after travelling 70 miles to meet a bunch of internet weirdos. Just because he doesn't post on here anymore doesn't make it right to slag him off. I'm not making judgements on your relationship, but I'd hate to think people would be ok with me cursing Roota when she leaves me to be the resident "masseuse" for the flagship of the Russian fleet.
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:19, Reply)

I really don't think anyone on here cares what I think of him. They make their own decisions and ignore my bitter remarks.
I know some people on here who I'm friends with are facebook friends with him and that is ok.

I've kept a lot that went on back because I'm not vindictive, just bitter.

I can't see you doing anything nasty to Roota for her to complain about.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:21, Reply)

That was weak
he was commenting on something that is very personal to you, and mocking you for it, you should have gone mental at him for that
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

I see his point.
He just doesn't know the whole story.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

That's never stopped anyone on here before

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

instigator

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

that should be in CAPS

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

INSTIGATOR
best of all the gators
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

I personally hope I've got me a keeper but regardless
I suppose I just don't like the idea of anyone getting slagged off because of an acrimonious breakup this may have happened to me on other message boards ¬_¬. I'll shut-up on the matter now. Apologies.
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:30, Reply)

she just called him a cunt and said he left her for a frumpy woman
it's not like she's posted a massive tirade about him
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:37, Reply)

I have in the past.
Although very few people would have known it was him if he hadn't been stupid and replied to me.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:40, Reply)

yeah, in the past
I think we should all just hug and move on.
But if you call me frumpy again I'll punch you in the pissflaps.
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:44, Reply)

Ouch!

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)

you shut your mouth when you're talking to me

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:46, Reply)

"No listening!
you hear me?"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:48, Reply)

Ooo! you're getting feisty.
I like that.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:48, Reply)

I'm a fighter. That's it.
No love here.
In fact, I told someone yesterday they were a 'glutton for punishment, no matter what I say or do you keep coming back for more so is it me that's hurting you or are you hurting yourself'
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:01, Reply)

ooh that's deep and shit

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:20, Reply)

Mainly shit

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:21, Reply)

I love you

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:28, Reply)

would you expect anything else from me?

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:33, Reply)

_{or because you keep hitting on other b3tans}
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

soon babe
we'll be together soon
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

that was said like someone would whilst holding a shotgun and a picture of me.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:54, Reply)

When I first joined DJ hit on me
then about a year later he sent me the exact same gaz forgetting he'd hit on me before.

Oh how I laughed all the way to the restraining order place
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:38, Reply)

the restraining order place?
court perhaps?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)

There should be some gaz templates available for quicker pandering.
To #NAME#
Hey, I saw that post about you #LINK# by #USER#, it was really mean, #he/she# is a #bastard/bitch# sometimes lol.
don't worry about it lol, I think you're funny :), this is b3ta it can be quite hard going sometimes, you just have to put up with it or put them on ignore :).
So where you from? I'm organising a bash soon you should come, a bash is where b3tans meet up. We're not all weird LOL! It'll be in a nice bar somewhere, not sure who's coming yet but I'd really like you to be there. That is if you're old enough to drink lol.

Gaz me back xxx
(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:49, Reply)

Hahaha
This FTW.
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:51, Reply)

you need to add "with a photo" to the end before the xxx

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:52, Reply)

I was going to go with:
Are you on facebook?? I'm on facebook we should add each other as friends, or on twitter, or MSN, I'm on loads of sites just let me know your email address!
(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:53, Reply)

so that's why you added me
I knew it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:55, Reply)

I suspect that would work better

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:55, Reply)

I'm a pro yo.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:58, Reply)

is that like a yo-yo?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:02, Reply)

you steal this from sf?

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:53, Reply)

Nah I stole the idea from a old post of mine about wormulus
www.b3ta.com/talk/6406624
(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:55, Reply)

Did SF send you a pander-gaz?
Oh god, you've GOT to send that onto me.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 16:29, Reply)

Lies! Damn lies!
I didn't forget hitting on you the first time when I tried to do it again later.
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:50, Reply)

me Roota
Roota me
she I
s me her

I think we all know that this version is considerably more plausible.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

you forgot to add the 'r'
to masseuse. Fail.
EDIT: and get rid of the 'se' as well obviously
( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

No, I left that in on purpose.
Because of you being a hermaphrodite.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:28, Reply)

...who still gets more sex than you do

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

'cos I've got so much more to offer ;)

( djtrialprice, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

EVERYONE gets more sex than me, Bert, but I don't feel the need to keep harping on about it.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:39, Reply)

I read that as: "stfu you moaning cow"

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

this^

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 15:26, Reply)