Jet lagged!
I've had fish and chips, a "ploughmans" lunch (what's with the apple?) and the guys took me out for Indian food tonight. They recommended a vindaloo..I may have suffered tonight but they'll suffer in the restroom later today!
And what's the taboo about not taking leftovers with you? I asked for a to go box and I guess that's an embarrassing thing here?

Abberacion - thanks for the message, but I work through Sunday to facilitate this rollout. Monday am heading down to London and will be staying in some place called Camden and back to Manchester Tuesday evening before I head home.

And just so this isn't boring:
Alt - when were you last "persuaded" to try something different that turned out the joke was on you?
(nolongernuts, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 5:26, 75 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

The taking leftovers home thing
is very American. Normally in the UK, portion sizes are sufficiently small that you can eat all of your meal in one sitting, rather than the ridiculously large amount of food served up in US restaurants.

That said, a lot of Indian and Chinese places will give you rather a lot of food!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:12, Reply)

I could answer that question but really it would be far TMI for anyone on here.
Even I have limits to what I'll admit too.

Glad you're having a good time : )
( girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:23, Reply)

Oh, go on!
Go on, go on, go on, go on, go on....

/Mrs_Doyle
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:32, Reply)

The joke is ALWAYS on me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:45, Reply)

*points*
*laughs*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:46, Reply)

Ahem
Name me one occasion where you and I have shared a forum and the denizens thereof have convalesced and concluded that you, rather than I, were fair game for teasing and japery?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:46, Reply)

Why would we need to convalesce?
It's not like we'd all been ill!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:48, Reply)

In hindsight, that might not have been the word I meant to use
But in the absence of a viable alternative and the presence of your good point I feel an edit would be a fruitless venture
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:49, Reply)

conversed
is probably what you were going for
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:51, Reply)

I think you're probably right
I had this idea that there was a fancier word for it but the more I think about it, the more likely it becomes that I was trying to be cleverer than I am
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:53, Reply)

coalesced
more likely.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:54, Reply)

I am plumping for 'conferred'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:55, Reply)

I may change to
"have had a bit of a talky talky"
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:56, Reply)

Zozimus is right
Thank you for being smarter than me and exhibiting it on B3ta

You're not the first
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:58, Reply)

Just trying to help
Chin up you big nancy.

*punches shoulder*
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:11, Reply)

*breaks shoulder*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:58, Reply)

I am happy to concede
that on this particular occasion the joke does in fact appear to be on you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Don't say I never do nothing for you

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:53, Reply)

I would never say that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:54, Reply)

Because of the inherent falsehood
or the hideous grammatical errors contained therein?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:58, Reply)

The latter, dear boy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:02, Reply)

I assumed as much
but nonetheless I am crushed by this news

*walks away slowly, head, hung, to the music from The Incredible Hulk*

Come to think of it, you probably know what that piece is called
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Sadly not.
I never even got to see that programme when I was a boy, because it was on ITV and until I was about six my mother claimed we could only get BBC on our television, in an attempt to shield me from common people and advertisements.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:06, Reply)

Hahaha!
They probably had lesbians on ITV too. I bet she's feeling sheepish now.
( girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:08, Reply)

I am imaginging an alternative universe
where the BBC was actually Channel5 and Monty grew up to be a massive drug taking, binge drinking, bowie loving... HANG ON A MINUTE
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:10, Reply)

sheepish contorted with Sapphic lust
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:14, Reply)

I made a conscious decision to become a Children's BBC kid
I used to turn back to ITV for the Chart Show though (but even that doesn't count because it was Channel 4 first)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:09, Reply)

I always watched BBC children's programmes.
Except at lunchtime, because ITV had such delights as Rainbow, Jamie and the Magic Torch, and Chorlton and the Wheelies.

The Flumps were on later, on BBC.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:12, Reply)

Jamie and the magic torch! Fantastic
And Handful of Songs - I liked that too.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:16, Reply)

Found it!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hsnYdOvlZI
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:17, Reply)

Handful of Songs
Was that Ralph McTell? The programme where kids sent in pictures and asked for songs to be sung for them?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:21, Reply)

I hate Ralph McTell
I'll show him something, that'll make him change his mind ABOUT EVER FUCKING SINGING ANYWHERE NEAR ME EVER A-FUCKING-GAIN, the anodyne cockmuncher.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:26, Reply)

Damn
I'll have to rethink your christmas present then
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:31, Reply)

You take that copy
of 'Bland, Patronising Pseudo-folk hits of the 70s' right back to the shop from which it was purchased.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:36, Reply)

I watched all those because I was at still at nursery/reception
Let's not forget Cockleshell Bay, followed by The Sullivans.
But at some point in infants or juniors I switched because ITV went shit and I liked the cozy institution of the BBC.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:16, Reply)

The Sullivans were good
really good. Far better than Neighbours.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:18, Reply)

Remember when Grace died? :(
My ideal parents are Grace Sullivan and Atticus Finch.
I also still pretend I'm Maggie from the pub when I'm working behind the bar.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:24, Reply)

The Sullivans rocked.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:19, Reply)

Totally
"AH LOOK OUT, SHE'S GOT YER CAP!"
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Whilst this is both amusing and understandable
It also smacks of bollocks, because I have a feeling that I'm 6 years younger than you for some reason and I saw it on TV. Probably in repeat form, but on TV nonetheless
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:11, Reply)

Did you see it on ITV?
Can you actually read?
And by the time he was Six Monty had grown out of childrens TV
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:14, Reply)

I'm sure you'd love to smack some bollocks
but I can assure you that this is 100% true. It meant that I regularly had no idea what people were talking about in the schoolyard. Thank you so much, mother.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:18, Reply)

Presumably this is why you've made such a point of riding the crest of the zeitgeist wave ever since
To clarify; I didn't mean to intimate that your fable of ITV restriction was bollocks, merely that not seeing ITV before the age of six wouldn't necessarily stop you seeing The Incredible Hulk, as it was repeated after you were six
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:25, Reply)

Calling him a cunt is quicker.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:30, Reply)

True
Not my style though. I very rarely call someone a cunt, even on B3ta. Unless they deserve it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:32, Reply)

that's why everyone thinks you're gay.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:37, Reply)

why how
thinks knows
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:40, Reply)

If I'd known it was as simple as that...
Chompy, you're a cunt
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Get rid of that comma.
We all know your penis is tiny.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:16, Reply)

Well spotted
Also: damn
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:23, Reply)

You're thinking of milky bars.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:11, Reply)

restroom?
I love that, who sleeps on the shitter? Are you enjoying your visit so far? how are you finding manc accent?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:50, Reply)

It's odd.
It's not what you hear on TV!
(nolongernuts, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 14:57, Reply)

Alt Q
Me and my mate came out of Greggs, sausage roll each in tow. Graeme took too many little plastic sachets of Heinz Tomato Sauce. Not the standard "rip" sachets, but the twisty packet type things that Heinz do...

We were headed down town for a small bit of shopping and a "small" amount of drinking. So Graeme asks "Would you like some sauce?"

"No thanks" I replied
"Aw go on"
"Nah you're alright" but it was too late. Graeme had already twisted the seal and was directing the hole at my sausage roll.

BUT YOU DIDN'T HIT THE SAUSAGE ROLL DID YOU GRAEME.

He sprayed ketchup all over me. I didn't even want the sauce!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Dreadful
In my book that entitles you to shit in his pint.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:16, Reply)

Vindaloo? Impressive.
Tonight, ask them if you can go down Canal Street, best night out in the city.

Alt Q: I can safely say I don't recall any time this has happened, because I'm a spiteful fucker, so anyone who gets me, knows they will get it back worse.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 8:53, Reply)

Oh and there is an apple in the ploughman's lunch because that is what a ploughman used to have with his lunch.
Silly boy.
( girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:07, Reply)

The ploughman's lunch as a concept was invented in the 1970s

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:08, Reply)

Once again, Montague, you're right.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:09, Reply)

I was being facietious (sp?)
I can't be bothered to look it up.
( girlinthehole, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:29, Reply)

If you had a Ploughmans, am I to assume you now know the joy of Branston Pickle?
That on a sandwich with Ham and cheese, fooking magnificent.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:13, Reply)

Yeah, that was pretty good
It went really well with the brie.
(nolongernuts, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 14:58, Reply)

I'm glad you're enjoying our food,
You'll be going through Milton Keynes when you head to Camden, look upon it in reverant fear.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:13, Reply)

and be thankful you will
never again have to go anywhere as dark, dismal and shit as Milton Keynes
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:15, Reply)

"You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy"

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:16, Reply)

I overheard two polish tourists on a coach driving through MK
"wow look at those buildings... it's just like New York"
/true
(PsychoChomp, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:17, Reply)

A burning, smouldering wreck?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:18, Reply)

I now have the shame...
... of working in Milton Keynes, as our head office has just relocated. Luckily I don't have to go there too often.

It's a hole.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:26, Reply)

I went through it last week
on my way to Nottingham. It seems very roundabout-centric.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:30, Reply)

high crime rate & lots of obnoxious residents?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Haha! Poor, stupid Polish people.
If they went to Luton they'd probably think it was like Blade Runner.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:24, Reply)

They see bonfires and think it's Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:32, Reply)

They see a Kinder Surprise
and think it's a Faberge egg.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:41, Reply)

They genuinely Can't Believe It's Not Butter.

(Cave Duck, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 9:48, Reply)

Pour boiling water over them
and you would get a new flavour of Pot Noodle
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 10:25, Reply)