I am going to a wedding this weekend where I have spectacularly fallen out with a couple of the guests.
I can already see there being confrontation with one of them however my question is this. Should I get blind drunk and just see what happens or should I avoid excess boozing and ensure Becca and Rob's wedding day isn't spoilt by shouty men.

Alt Q? what wedding shenanigans have you witnessed in the past?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:37, 66 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

There's always supposed to be a fight at a wedding, along with someone that passes out far too early
Carry on drinking and you'll fulfilling one of two stereotypes so it'll be fine!
(Pirate Monkey is not the goddamn Batman, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:39, Reply)

Have you fallen out with them
As they have realised you are a massive tosser?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Probably

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:41, Reply)

at least I get invited places angry badger bitch

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:45, Reply)

I have been invited somewhere this weekend
by totally awesome people WOOO Excitement
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:50, Reply)

Food shopping doesn't count

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:50, Reply)

Nor does collecting dry cleaning

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:52, Reply)

Damn right.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:52, Reply)

Avoid excess boozing, it'll cause trouble
Alt Q: My brother telling my Dad to 'get fucked'
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:40, Reply)

for once a serious reply
don't be a dick. don't let the other people be a dick.

If someone did that at my wedding I'd punch them in the fucking face.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:41, Reply)

This^
plus people will be talking about him forever as the cunt who got into a fight at a wedding. Nobody want to be that person.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Ok I'll stick to the green and be mellow

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:45, Reply)

yeah I'd be pretty mad if people kicked off at my wedding.
The day is specifically all about me and no one will take that away from me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:50, Reply)

what about the future Mr O'Hara is any of the day about him?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:51, Reply)

it's touching that you'd think of me and my feelings

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:52, Reply)

feelings penis
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:53, Reply)

why are you thinking of his penis?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:55, Reply)

I think that wins the prize for most backfiring strikethrough I've seen

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:56, Reply)

How does a penis backfire?
What's wrong with thinking about the occasional penis?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:59, Reply)

you corrected what I said to make out that you were thinking of my penis.
were you thinking of my penis?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:00, Reply)

just general penises.
A penis here, a penis there. Penis penis penis.

It doesn't look like a word anymore!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:01, Reply)

that's not what happened though
read the above.

you are thinking about my penis. I can't blame you, but it is a little unsettling and I'd rather you didn't.

We've already got enough queers of epic proportions knocking about here (Darth, Monty, Al etc.) we don't need another.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:02, Reply)

to be honest I just thought it would be funny to write penis. Then I didn;t understand what Kitty had
written so just kept on about penises. Darth isn't a bumder he is at most bi curious.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:18, Reply)

he's the biggest homo-denier that ever was

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:19, Reply)

He has a very pretty female sex partner
Is that a cover up also?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:24, Reply)

yes

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Good point
After all, we're forced to think about you regularly, you terrible penis
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:01, Reply)

And I thought we were internet friends!
there aren't enough penises in the world to cheer me up now.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:02, Reply)

You're mildly amusing, I'll give you that.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:03, Reply)

A penis backfires as follows:
Push hard against the biffin then as one comes the ejaculate backfires into the bladder.
Simples.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:23, Reply)

maybe that was his way of telling you.
If he touches you I'll batter him.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:59, Reply)

I'd quite like to see that

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:00, Reply)

Ha.
No.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:55, Reply)

Stay moderately sober
And avoid the guests you've fallen out with. It would be very unfair to ruin your friends wedding day by having a massive row with people.

Alt Q. Only ever been to one wedding realy. It was pretty cool though - a punk rock wedding. Took place in a registry office, moved onto a massive park and then wound up in a club after.
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:42, Reply)

^^ be decent, you can't lose
It will either smooth over the rough patch or make them look like tossers if they start a row with you.

I've been to a punk biker wedding. I've led a sheltered life so it was quite a new experience for me. I thought the groomsmen's leather ass-chaps and studded vests were quite the fashion statement, far outdoing the best man's tuxedo-on-a-T-shirt.

And I saw the Maid of Honor's nipples. During the ceremony. She was wearing a cheap lace dress and no undergarments. I refused to look down. The best lesson I learned that day was the tailoring and good foundation garments make a world of difference when wearing a wedding dress. Or maybe the best lesson was, the bride should stop chewing gun before the minister says, "you may kiss the bride."
( kila is reading clocks upside-down as usual, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)

Avoid the booze
be the bigger man and walk outside if the fight's going to happen.

Alt Q: Went to a friend's wedding last month. Had my shirt torn off by a girl who then went on to tell the girlfriend that she was very lucky as I was very handsome.

The girl was very, very drunk. Blindly so. I'm not very handsome, merely moderately so.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:44, Reply)

Don't spoil it. Not worth it.
You'll be even more of a social outcast if you do.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:44, Reply)

I'm not a social outcast now you cheeky fucker =)

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:52, Reply)

You bit. Excellent.
Morning.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:53, Reply)

I might change my name to Biter Pires
although the sexual connotations of that are scary. Morning to you to chum.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:54, Reply)

The sexual connotations are exactly why you should change your name to that.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:56, Reply)

at this rate you will have dictated most of my name and sig!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:59, Reply)

I like being a dictator

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:00, Reply)

tator
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:01, Reply)

ha. I was expecting that.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:03, Reply)

I was expecting you to expect it so I did it and stuff.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:07, Reply)

Just behave and ignore them if they don't behave.
Then after the wedding, they're fair game.
It's not your day or their day. It's the happy couple's day.

I saw a happy dog at a wedding and it made me sad that my Tigger lacks the social skills to be allowed at my wedding.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:45, Reply)

The last wedding between friends I went to
they had their dog bring the rings up the aisle on a pillow strapped to his back. Is it just me or is that massively shit.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:47, Reply)

That is stupid
Each to their own, but this dog didn't have an official role or a poncy outfit. It was just included because it is a member of the family.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:49, Reply)

That's pathetic.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:50, Reply)

At my wedding
I had her ring in my pocket, and she had mine on her thumb. No fumbling about. It went as smoothly as could be asked.
( Wanderer, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:00, Reply)

how do BFF
holiday good?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:51, Reply)

hiya you
it was BOSS.
How's life?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:09, Reply)

not bed ta
booked my wedding date and venue :-)

glad it was good
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:11, Reply)

Did you book that one I saw that time?
The pretty glass place?
And what date?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:26, Reply)

no, we decided against that one, mainly because of the woman who runs the place
we're going for a georgian hotel in the centre of Exeter

10th September 2011
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Having just been to a hotel wedding
I would say that this is Where It's At.
There's no travelling. Once you're there you're there, you can even sleep over if you like and have a good cooked breakfast the next morning. It adds to the nice vibe with the guests if they stay there.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:32, Reply)

glad you approve
we thought that seeing as at least half the guests live in Exeter then it'd be nice.

We get free accommodation in one of their suites as part of it too. The main thing is, the guy who runs the place is a total dude. Really helpful and friendly and we've heard good things about food and weddings there.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Secondeded.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:34, Reply)

Although I didn't witness it, some innocent passer by was stabbed outside my brother's reception.
The murderer had been on the invite list, but was crosssed off for being too much of a psycho.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:02, Reply)

Say sorry it was all your fault and buy them a drink to let bygones be bygones.
Then after the wedding take it all back and cunt them in the fuck.
Are you good enough an actor to carry that off?
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:12, Reply)

yes even though it wasnt my fault!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:19, Reply)

Doesn't matter. Lie through your teeth.
You get to have a happy wedding do then a big fight afterwards.
It's fine because you know you are lying which will help you enjoy it.
Win-Win!
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:25, Reply)

cheers porky you sensible bastard

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:41, Reply)

My own wedding
My new sister in laws husband told my new father in law that he was the worst father in law ever. My new father in law to be fair tried to defuse the situation by walking away. Unfortunately he was followed and they had a fight in the car park and made my new bride cry. I was not happy but by this point I had dislocated my knee and was unable to walk so neither got a punch.

Also I once worked the bar at a gypsy wedding held in a big rugby club bar. Fights broke out every few minutes, mostly between the women and they seemed to love it.
( Peej, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 11:45, Reply)

I'll join the chorus.
Don't get drunk, and behave. It's not your day, after all, and it would be horrid to wreck theirs.
( Wanderer, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:01, Reply)