I'm angry - or I would be if I could get together the energy for rage rather than just feeling sad about it
My ex has finally sent through some paperwork for the divorce (we split up four years ago) and he wants a no blame one - fine. However this also comes with no financial strings attached whatsoever. I walked out with the kids and my clothes. I can't afford to pay the most expensive solicitors in town to ensure I at least have money for the kids. He has the best accountants and extremely rich parents - between them it appears that he's penniless.
Bunch of cunts.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:30, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

we should probably kill him

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:31, Reply)

cunt is the only word for him
I feel impotently angry on your behalf now
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:32, Reply)

That's exactly it - my anger is entirely impotent!
There is fuck all I can do about it and they know it.
Money fucking talks when you're a rich cunting farmer.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:34, Reply)

Impotent anger at an ex is my specialist subject.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:35, Reply)

impotent anger in general is mine

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:36, Reply)

I try to keep mine at bay
just in order to be able to talk to him reasonably about the kids - he does try to be a good father (useless but mostly harmless). If it wasn't for that I'd be pounding his face into a mash.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:40, Reply)

t ce because of
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Dammit people this is HILARIOUS.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 16:30, Reply)

I smiled to myself about it if that helps

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 16:32, Reply)

"a rich cunting farmer"
It's more fun than fish farming, though the smell is about the same.
(Cave Duck, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:51, Reply)

javla fitta!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:32, Reply)

RIS?

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:43, Reply)

It means
'Fucking cunt' in Swedish.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:43, Reply)

Yes, yes he is.
But sadly there's no law against that.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:50, Reply)

Not yet there isn't
*conspiratorial wink*
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Isn't there a minimum payment he has to pay for the kids?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:33, Reply)

If she goes via the (completelyt shit) CSA I think it's 15% of gross income.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:34, Reply)

CSA have been entirely useless
And I had to go that way in order to get tax credits - you can't claim them unless the CSA have been contacted.
They even promised to begin a criminal investigation for fraud but again a shit-hot solicitor can outwit them.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Not if your 'income' is less than £15 a week
Amazing what a good accountant can do.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:37, Reply)

Uh huh,
They can hide things but they can't make them dissapear.
So I assume he's self employed?
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Yep.
And if you've noticed the agricultural economy over the last twenty or so years it's been fairly poor.

Fucking rich in land and property though, just no liquid assets.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:41, Reply)

It's fucking disgusting. I'm sorry to hear about all this.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Well that's getting more complicated then I suppose.
I wouldn't know where to start but I think you shouldn't give up, but you should be realistic about what you can get.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Realistically I'll be getting nothing.
And I lost a house (sold when we got married - no equity just cleared the mortgage) - we lived in a farm property so no rent but also made me homeless when I left.
I also lost ten years of my career - I gave up full time teaching in schools to have our children - a joint decision but with the benefit of hindsight I wouldn't have given up my career - I'd be a head teacher by now.
All that said I'm now far happier and have a far, far better life than he ever will because his family are cunts.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:48, Reply)

And your boyfriend is awesome

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:49, Reply)

Six pack and huge cock
Hahahahahahahah!

Yeah, you've got to be grateful for small (and not so small) mercies.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:51, Reply)

now pjm
stop using chickenlady's account...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Doesn't bode well for my skills as an Accountant
one of my clients is being financially arseraped by his ex-wife and the CSA.

I'm assuming your ex-husband is in a partnership with his parents and they are in business as farmers? Can you not request full partnership accounts? Can you prove that his lifestyle does not match his share of the profits?

(TBH I am out of my depth with this sort of thing, accounts preparation and tax calculation is as far as I go).
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:49, Reply)

Yes
However, there are ways and means - entirely legal - which ensure that you do all the work but own nothing. Add to that various shenanigans which lead to writing off any profit against new 'necessary' purchases.

In theory it is possible to take him to the cleaners but in practice if everything is owned by your parents and not you or your new partner then it's half of fuck all.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Look at Dame Shirley Porter.
Tesco heiress but 'unable to pay her fine'...? Fucking bollocks.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:59, Reply)

Exactly
If you're rich you can get out of most things because it's in the best interests of your accountants, solicitors and all the other bastards to keep you rich.
Cunting bastards.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:01, Reply)

I thought that might be the case
They can claim 100% of the first £50,000 spent on large capital items. So all they have to do is buy a tractor (probably on 0% finance) and bye-bye profits.

My client has to account for EVERYTHING he spends, just to prove to the CSA that he doesn't have undisclosed income.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:06, Reply)

He does the same but claims that he spends a lot more on the kids than he does
And then it comes down to my word against his.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Some things will be in your favour
If he cohabits with a new partner, the CSA should take her income into account when it comes to his child support payments, but they wont take into account the income of your new partner.

However, all my knowledge of such things is based on my 1 client who is going through the CSA mangle.

Good luck.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:16, Reply)

Thanks
I need to nag the CSA again anyway - they promised a criminal investigation about a year ago and I've heard nothing ever since about it.
To be honest I think the only way I can do anything is through them - I can't afford to go through expensive and lengthy litigation costs and he knows it.
Royally screwed I think is the term.
Avoid farmers, kids!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:20, Reply)

capitalising the A of accountant
doesn't make it cool.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:05, Reply)

Fine
accountant
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:07, Reply)

You might make yourself even poorer by trying to get what's owed to your kids too
and cause yourself a whole lot of stress. Sod him, let him fail his children, give up what you left with him as lost.
Start all over, free from him and your marriage to him.
I know it's infuriating, but I was never going to get a penny out of my ex, so I eventually came to terms with the fact that I'd been taken for a ride. I was also confident that everybody would see her for what she is, and they did. So will your ex's children.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:35, Reply)

this ^^
I finally picked up the last things from my ex on monday and I now consider him to be an irrelevance
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:39, Reply)

That's how I feel most of the time
but as I've just received letters from his extremely expensive solicitors today I'm utterly airborne.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:42, Reply)

he'll get his...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:55, Reply)

I'm sure he will
I try to be honest but fair when I talk about him to the kids - he does try to be a good father but he's useless. They're not daft and they hate their grandparents now because they can see how we lived.

Still, I'd love to punch him and his parents.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:00, Reply)

He's not trying to be a good father if he's not providing for them

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:01, Reply)

I'm trying to be fair and measured here
He is useless.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:02, Reply)

if he begrudges paying anything towards the kids
then that's not really the attitude of a good father.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:01, Reply)

RAR!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:02, Reply)

*claws air*
I stand by it though.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:04, Reply)

Money before kids, always!
It just makes them grow up tough if they go without.
And anyway money is what people with degrees make and their mother has far too many of them.

*seethes*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:04, Reply)

I can't stand people like that
poor justification so they don't ever have to experience actually going without a little in order to help those who should mean so much to them.

He will get his just desserts of that I am sure. Possibly with the aid of a cricket bat and a balaclava
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:09, Reply)

I have had rock climbing mates offer to 'sort him out' for about £500
And at least one b3tan who has 'dealings' with dodgy types made the same offer a couple of years back.

It's tempting but doesn't pay for the school shoes.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:12, Reply)

no but he'll realise how much shoes cost
when he pisses on his in terror
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:14, Reply)

Hahahaah!
So very tempting.
But in all honesty I'm not the vengeful type - I'm the impotent rage on the internet type that shows a smiley face to the world while wishing him dead - by natural causes.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:17, Reply)

A good father would sell some land and provide for his children.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:03, Reply)

He'd say that that's a short term answer
by keeping the land there'll be something for his kids when they grow up.

Despite the fact that they probably won't have anything to do with him by then and they'll sell it all to BLACK PEOPLE! That'll make his entire family spontaneously combust - even those in their graves.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:06, Reply)

They'll make sure that there's 'nothing' for the kids to inherit anyway

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:09, Reply)

This is not necesarily true, sadly.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 15:01, Reply)