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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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So,
I hear that you're there hearing that I'll be here, soon.

Word spreads faster and wider than a Nun it seems!
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:23, 160 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
fuck off bert

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Survey says...
X
X
X
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:28, Reply)
Shut up Bert

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:26, Reply)
Wrong.
First wish gone.
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:28, Reply)
Oh I get it.
HILARIOUS
(PsychoChomp, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:26, Reply)
There is some Srs Sad Facing going on here today.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:54, Reply)
God that was lame

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:28, Reply)

Hey, Its the first day back from a Bank Holiday, what did you expect?
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:29, Reply)
I don't know you, so nothing

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:49, Reply)
Kiddie fucker
Justifier.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Don't knock it til you've tried it!
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:31, Reply)
Tsk.
I'm JeffTheDogFucker - you can't teach me anything.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Old dog yourself then?
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:34, Reply)
You forgot Nazi

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:50, Reply)
Shut up Bert

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:44, Reply)
*Withering stare, stony-faced silence*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:44, Reply)
Alright Monty.
Do any Doogie Howsering* this weekend?

*JTDF getting down with the kids.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:46, Reply)
Wotcha Jeff.
I was a good boy, actually. Tonight may be the night.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:53, Reply)
I wish to point out
That I - and I alone - have the power to bestow 'good boy' status on anyone. Usually said whilst rubbing a mutts head and getting them all over excited. A very good boy may get a choc drop or a bone to reward outstanding behaviour.

As you were.

Drugs on a school night? Tsk.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:56, Reply)
I know, I know....

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:05, Reply)
Who's sock are you?
Roota will find out soon enough, so make it easier on yourself.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:45, Reply)
This one's evidently a bit of fun
So it's fine, for now...
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:52, Reply)
I'm picturing you with one of them leafy headband things and a toga
deciding to put your thumb up or down in respect of whether or not this puppet gets to live
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:55, Reply)
Oh man that would be ace

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:57, Reply)
I'm picturing her with one of them headband things with a stick on it.
trying to hit the right key with each nod.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:57, Reply)
Laurel wreath?
'leafy headband' - Jesus wept.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:02, Reply)
I like things like that
Like when you say Orny Elmet instead of Viking helmet.
Or 'hat and coat' for cap and gown.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:07, Reply)
that's it!
I thought it was something laurelly but couldn't remember. YOU KNEW WHAT I MEANT. Miserable.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:07, Reply)
Ok inspector.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:56, Reply)
Guten morgan Herr Pope

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:46, Reply)
morgen, nein?
Or has the Pope good a good Morgan in his garage?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:53, Reply)
The Freeman one
who he will later beat up for being black.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:55, Reply)
I was going to type even more
but I have forgotten all the German spelling. Even though I passed my GCSE way back in 1993, I still remember a lot of it, just not the spelling.

Pointless language anyway, Mandarin is the way foreward.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:57, Reply)
If you want to talk to ducks.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:59, Reply)
You'd be quackers not to

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:00, Reply)
The only German I know
was picked up from 'Warlord' and 'Commando' comics.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:03, Reply)
Wolfenstein 3d for me.
"Mein leiben!"
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)
Good times

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:07, Reply)
SCHWEINHUND!

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)
An insult I have used almost daily for 30+ years

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:12, Reply)
good man

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:13, Reply)
The problem with the original Wolfenstein
was having to rub up against every wall hitting the action key to try and find all the secrets.

I still play "Return to Castle Wolfenstein" every now and then. Zombie Nazis, what's not to like?
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:14, Reply)
plus it was really hard the original
the new is one is pretty average. I am falling in love with Borderlands again now my xbox can go online without shitting itself.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:17, Reply)
It was hard, which is why you needed to find the secret rooms (to get the better weapons sooner)
the new Wolfenstein had such bad reviews I didn't bother (that and there's only so many FPS you can play).

Haven't played boarderlands, Left 4 Dead 2 kind of upstaged it.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:21, Reply)
L4D2
is so good. I love that game. Borderlands has the "just 5 MOAR minutes" thing going on. V addictive.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:34, Reply)
Defending the stage at the end of "Dark Carnival" never gets boring
and I like the "Midnight Riders" music! "Every lady's crazy when her daddy's not around!"
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:39, Reply)
Sniper Elite
"habe ich ihn gehoert"
"bleib wo du bist"
"Hilfe!"
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:11, Reply)
Gott in Himmel
and Aiiiii

and Kamerad
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)
Raus, raus, Englander pig-dog!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:11, Reply)
You're very good, can you speak nip too.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:18, Reply)
Nice! "Nein! Der Tommies are comming! Schnell!"
"Take that Fritz!"

I don't remember Gaylord comics though.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:06, Reply)
Warlord was identical to Commando
Same small square format, same everything if I remember rightly.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:10, Reply)
When I was 21, I had a stop-gap job in the newsagents at Bristol Airport
I used to read the Commando comics (and sometimes the porn mags, but mostly Commando).
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)
Christ all mighty, this website Is Not Hard, it's a forum, where people can talk about this'n'that'n'other.
There really is no need at all to keep on creating new accounts because nobody liked you in your first account, just man up and be like "Oh, yeah', I was a twat, hopefully not anymore" or something like that.

Someone on the telly stole my idea, pizza where they replace the tomarto with chocolate, toppings with things like peanutbutter/marshmillows/nuts/whatever, and replace the cheese with carmel.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:53, Reply)
they do that in Hotel Chocolat
it looks delicious but it's about £12
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:54, Reply)
Oh my, do you put it in the oven or something so everything is all melty-gooy-lush?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:56, Reply)
I wouldn't
it would just end up a very expensive bowl of liquid chocolate.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)
Gonz
I had that pizza about 5 years ago in my local italian.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:55, Reply)
I totally invented it when I was a young kid, and by 'invent', I mean, thought of it.
I'm going to have to document all my ideas, like the Deep Fried Gobstopper Of Doom and Lobster Tempora and Desert Lasagnia and Italian Fry Up.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:58, Reply)
Mail the ideas to yourself

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)
Get one of those Top Secret stamps

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)
They said on Dragon's Den that that doesn't count anymore =(

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:11, Reply)
it'll count when I'm a dragon, Gonz
it'll count.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:07, Reply)

With a normal bread base? that would be rank? the base would need to be donuty or something, maybe waffles?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:58, Reply)
Traditional italian pizza base, like thin-crust.
But I think the pizza-shop style 'deep pan' would work too, which I've always called a savory doughnut.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:00, Reply)

Deep pan is a brilliant shout. What is the cheese substitute? EDIT - Caramel, sorry re read your post. I would def have one of those pizzas. Still prefer a normal pepperoni though.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:01, Reply)
Nob cheese?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:03, Reply)
I'm so gay for you right now

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)
Proper LOL'ing
Innit.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:08, Reply)

lol fist
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)
You'd love it.
Love it if I was to put my massive hand in your arse. Whilst signing something about Wenger.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:10, Reply)

On a serious note, if he doesn't buy a keeper today I may be upset. Given is staying at Shitty so unless Fulham pick up that Stoke fella no Schwarzer to Arsenal.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:14, Reply)
There is one at Ashton Gate you can have.
Apparently he used to be quite good. Played for England and everything.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:16, Reply)
He isn't called Calamity James for nothing.
What a shit start your lot are having. And Rovers too for that matter.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:19, Reply)
My lot are having a shit start to the season.
That other team you mention are just shit.

Any more talk about that old team, and I'll tell everyone you love Spurs.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:20, Reply)
I should out of family ties be a rovers fan
My Grandad was there clud Doctor for years and years. When he died the whole family got free tickets and they did a one minutes applause for him. I was quite touched by that.

Still I drove to London the week after and watched some real football.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)
Is clud a term for 'team of spackers'

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)
yes,
yes it is.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)
:-)

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)
Depends on what you want, something like carmel would work.
Donno if that'll be _too_ sickly though.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)

What about that flavoured Marshmallow spread you can buy? I can feel an experiment coming on Gonz
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:06, Reply)
Yup, that'll work.
Marshmellow, [stuff they fill a crunchy with], peanutbutter, peacons, carmel, chocolate, malteesers, banana, popping candy... I might give it a shot this weekend, I could do home made normal pizza too, never made that.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:10, Reply)

I make homemade pizza's a lot. Pizza is my favourite food ever. I know it's boring and not very exotic or anything but I love it. Post pics and recipe when you are done as I will try too.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:13, Reply)
Asda's pizza base mix is really good
Wiggy makes some awesome pizzas from that. I'm struggling to find a decent pizza place here in Manchester, all the ones near me are run by curry/kebab places so they're not very nice pizza.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:18, Reply)
Asda pizzas
are really nice to be fair. The only think I don't like about supermarket pizza is the crust is rock hard and not doughy enough. There is an Italian restaurant in the nearest town that has started doing takeaway. They make excellent pizza. Why don't you start a Pizza Empire to go with the Corset, Cup cake and origami swan factory you have.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:21, Reply)
I use my breadmaker pretty much exclusively for pizza dough
can't beat a homemade pizza
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Breadmakers any good? or does it depend on how good the mixture you make first is as I would be shit at that bit.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:24, Reply)
if you can follow instructions then it is easy
I get mine using nectar points, so it was essentially free.

The bread is pretty good, but the pizza dough is awesome. Well worth it for that alone.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:23, Reply)
Yesterday I really fancied a pizza, so I spent a good couple of hours on Pizza Hut/Dominos/Papa John's websites.
And in the end, I realised I don't want to spend a _minimum_ of £15 on a medioca meal for one person.

None of them cator to people eating by themselves.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:35, Reply)
yeah but cold pizza breakfast = WIN!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:36, Reply)
Nice =D

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:34, Reply)

I actually created this account for witty replies to this weeks QOTW.

Unfortunately, I'm not quite as witty as I first thought.
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:18, Reply)
alright bert

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 11:57, Reply)
Your Cathedral is shit, because it doesn't have this:
www.liverpoolcathedral.org.uk/files/Soul%20Spectacular.pdf

I want to go to this so I can sing Band of Gold with Freda Payne, Me & Mrs Jones with Billy Paul, Misty Blue with Dorothy Moore and "Solid as a Cock" with Ashford & Simpson.
So I'm going over to the Proddy side.

Oh, hold on, cheapest ticket is £100 :(
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:01, Reply)
shocking.

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)
Fuck me lar.
Those tickets are costly.

In no way is this boss.*

*I'm learning.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:06, Reply)
haha speaking the language of the natives
love it
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:10, Reply)
*Beams with pride*
At having mastered another dialect.*

*Well, I say mastered, I mean adding 'lar' to things and occasioning the odd 'boss' reference.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:12, Reply)
They only say 'lar' in the South End.
If you go to Fazakerly and say 'lar' they will call you a naughty name that means black person.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:16, Reply)
Come'ead
scousedictionary.blogspot.com/

I'll keep revising.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:18, Reply)
Very blond people get called come'ead too.
True.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:18, Reply)
Divvy.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)
Linford Christie?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:21, Reply)
Kris Akabusi

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)
Robert Mugabe!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:25, Reply)
It doesn't say which cathedral
This could be embarasing.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:06, Reply)
It is Liverpool Cathedral
Which is the Anglican one.
Liverpool Metropolitan Cathedral is Paddy's Wigwam.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:08, Reply)
Cheers sweetpea

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:08, Reply)
Anytime
The proddy one is nicer and looks more like a church, but the Catholic one smells more holy.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:10, Reply)
^ this is true ^
I smell of holiness after I go to the Basilica
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:20, Reply)
I lica basil too.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)
Pope, it's happened, I knew that it would
I knew that as soon as I became The Cat Hater, a Nemesis would be born for me to do battle with...

b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=21384
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:06, Reply)
Shut up Bert

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:11, Reply)

Dog Hater - a member for 6 years, 7 months and 10 days
Cat Hater - a member for 21 days
The Pope - a member for 4 days

Roota, one of these is Bert do your thing.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:11, Reply)
These are all Bert. He's trying multiple personalities to find one that other people may like.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:13, Reply)
Good luck with that, Bert!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:16, Reply)
I got talking to a nice girl the other night, and she thought I was Bert too
but after a little while I think she changed her slightly drink-befuddled mind.

What is it that makes you think I'm Bert? Or are you still just trying to wind me up?
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:13, Reply)
Shut up Bert

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)
The fact that you blundered in just a week or two after Bert had buggered off
and didn't seem to have anything to say besides "FUCK OFF CATS!" It seemed a little Bert-esque, I have to say.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:18, Reply)
I was a lurker on the main board and links for quite a while before I came here
I only found this place when everywhere else was really quiet.

The 'Fuck Off Cats' thing was a retaliation to weeks of cat videos on /links, and I was posting it for a week before I even came here.
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)
Jesus, WBM
Do you ever sleep???
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)
ha!

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:25, Reply)
Ah, that makes more sense
You haven't to remember that due to the fervent cliquiness of /offtopic, many of us never venture beyond this board and so wouldn't have seen the week of cat videos on /links, or your previous posts on /board.

We're a bit like an Amish community, but with less humour.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:23, Reply)
To be fair, I didn't set this account up as a troll
but my one post on board didn't receive the recognition I felt it deserved, so I got in a strop!
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:25, Reply)
Could you hate a cat enough to throw it at a window?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)
If you'd seen what I was posting on links
you'd know that it's the cat owners that I really have a problem with.

I could probably throw a cat owner at a window, if they were small enough.
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:32, Reply)
I own a cat and there is zero chance of you throwing me through a window

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:35, Reply)
they don't make windows big enough.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:11, Reply)
That's what I was going for =)

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:16, Reply)
I didn't read the Cat Hater's post
now I realise that was pretty obvious, belm.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:18, Reply)

*PATs on back* there there, it's ok now.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:59, Reply)
Self-loathing, eh?
I can help you out.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:39, Reply)
I might be a miserable cunt,
but at least I'm not boring. My shit's original......
(nolongernuts, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 6:11, Reply)
they could all be Bert
They're probably all the same person, but I don't really care at this stage because they're just messing about, and not going "Oh today at lunchtime I went to the shops because my mother wanted some nylons, and then I watched Jamie and the Magic Torch and The Sullivans and then I went back to school" and proper living in some mad dream like WBM or Edmund.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)
CAT HATER AND POPE YOU ARE HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH YOURSELF
This makes you more mental than Roger's poor senile mother, inbred fiancée and WBM put together!
Love, God x
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:12, Reply)
stop it, please
I am genuinely not the pope, or Bert
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)
Then you are Crystal
Future Mrs TheStarfish
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)
I like this

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:16, Reply)

like this am Bert
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)
but even when I admit it you don't shut up!

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)
I don't really mind if you are Bert to be honest
I don't even know why I keep pestering you about it.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)
Conformity

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:39, Reply)
I was setting him up for a Shut up Bert and you spoilt it!
Everyone conforms to something.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:48, Reply)
shut up chompy

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:50, Reply)
I'm gonna run over the next Badger I see now.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 12:55, Reply)
It'll fuck up your car
they're built like tanks
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:00, Reply)
I know I live in the countyside
plus I like animals. Once I even stopped some Badger hunters in our woods. Get loads of lampers here too I hate it.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:05, Reply)
Little pissed off that you fell for it?
Guess what, Roota.......you might be "popular" on b3ta, but you're probably as much as a miserable fuck in real life as I am
(nolongernuts, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 6:13, Reply)
Can I just check with everyone?
Is this 'Bert' in the context of 'Monkeysex'?
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:19, Reply)
Yes it is
They are awaiting the advent of his new form, like a cross between Dr. Who, Christ and Jerry Sadowitz.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:28, Reply)
I need to start taking notes...

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:31, Reply)

It amuses me that not even Rootatron can decipher who I am.

Continue with your Bert-esque wishes for me to be he.
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:22, Reply)
I'm not arsed
You're just messing about.
Like I said before, if you were all "I'm a nurse, my wife is a postman, we've just got back from Tenby." then I'd be thinking "Fuck off you sad cunt, who are ya?"
But being the Pope, well it' fine isn't it.
Well it's not fine, 'cos he's a Nazi peeeedo, but you catch my drift.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Good to hear, my child!
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Ere, can you talk to the saints?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:40, Reply)

Not sure they'll stay in this world for long at this rate.
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:50, Reply)

world league
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:54, Reply)
What?
Listen Joe, don't start being all cryptic.
I can't call you Father. I've got a dad. I only ever called Father Dunn 'Father' and he's not even a priest any more so we can call him Jimmy.
And you're not really called Benedict, so that's out too.
Joe it is.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:57, Reply)

Bless your girliness.
(ThePope, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:04, Reply)
Thanks, Your Holiness

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:13, Reply)

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