Important Question
I need you to name my pet tree.
( WormuIus, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:03, 61 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You can't call it Eric, I'm going to call my new car eric
and I don't want to get them confused when we have conversations.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:04, Reply)

Cockhound

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:05, Reply)

Its one of these
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacred_Fig
( WormuIus, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:08, Reply)

I've got a fig tree, easy and low maintenance
It aint got no name though
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

Sappy the standalone pet

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:09, Reply)

It should have a respectable human name

( WormuIus, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:10, Reply)

Why? Does it speak to you? Does it hold you close when you are sad?
Call it Treebeard
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

Didn't Bert say you were molested by a family member? If so which one was it ?
I just can't be arsed going back through the drama threads
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:17, Reply)

Oh Rory, you're such a card!
Srs internet bsns right here
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:40, Reply)

I was mildly appalled with all the willing admissions of incest
Just when I thought this place had hit rock bottom
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Tostig
Bernard, Giles, Aethelwulf, Morgan, Jonesie, Ngwa, Cthulhu, Peter.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:09, Reply)

Morgan is ok I guess.

( WormuIus, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:10, Reply)

Wenceslas
Gary, Aleksandros, Salah-ad-din, Kuli, Sam
( Kroney, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

Sam is the best of all the names.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:20, Reply)

I concur

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:21, Reply)

It's a good, strong, manly, masculine name
Screams machismo and broad, hairy shoulders.

Edit: Oh, hi TGB.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:26, Reply)

You clearly haven't met Wookiee then.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:28, Reply)

I haven't met anyone off here
I'm comfortable with my silent, faceless judging.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:29, Reply)

You're on The List now

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:30, Reply)

That's OK
It's that long now that by the time you get down to my name, I'll be old and past enjoying life anyway.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:32, Reply)

Are you not already?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:43, Reply)

Not far off, my boy.
Not far off.
( Kroney, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Cheers you elderly shitbag,
I'll have you know I've had to start shaving my shoulders, all the hair that used to be on my head appears to have migrated there.

Also, I still have one of your dalek socks. I don't know why.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:44, Reply)

To wank into?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Eventually it'll be sufficiently encrusted to stand up on its own,
then I just need to wank into a sock with a picture of the Doctor on and I can make them fight.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)

I had no idea one was missing to be honest.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)

Shitcunt. Or Bert. I find these to be interchangeable

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:11, Reply)

Sid
Sid is a good tree name
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:11, Reply)

Leaf Erikson

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

^ this is the best so far

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:16, Reply)

SpankyPlanky

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

Lavva

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:16, Reply)

Woody Harrelson.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:17, Reply)

click

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:25, Reply)

Shame it's not an ivy plant.
You could have painted it bright pink and called it Magenta De Vine.

Oh my aching sides.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:18, Reply)

David Boughie

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:18, Reply)

That's excellent.
All the more apt given DB's wooden performances.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:19, Reply)

Eyethangyow

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:24, Reply)

why not just call it your penis like everyone else?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:21, Reply)

Tim or Ber?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:23, Reply)

Rodney.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:24, Reply)

Theresa Green

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:26, Reply)

Ronnie Barker.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:27, Reply)

Barkley.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:28, Reply)

Twiggy
LOL
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Sandi Toksfig

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:30, Reply)

rachelswipe
what other name could there be?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:32, Reply)

Got it!
Roota.

Case closed, move along.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 12:32, Reply)

I am touched.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:45, Reply)

you will be

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:47, Reply)

Who by?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:48, Reply)

there's a long list
you are quite sought-after
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:48, Reply)

Only on B3ta, according to workrogersme.
In real life she assumes I am as miserable as her :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:51, Reply)

I don't think it's possible to be as miserable as her

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Well that'll learn me to get pissed and respond abusively to her assumptions.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:54, Reply)

when was this?
and what happened?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:57, Reply)

Oh it was mainly by gaz.
But it started from that confession thread of hers.
And she'd gazzed me apologising and saying she was mortified by what she'd said to me.
But then I took the piss out of her on her thread, and she kept saying I was only pissed off cos I'd been fooled by her, and I said I was evidently not fooled for a second, then I got pedantic, then she said I was pathetic and then I told her I'm praying for her.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 14:01, Reply)

what a mad tart.
her actions baffle me
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 14:08, Reply)

Figgy Stardust

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 13:46, Reply)

POTD

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Cema.
It'll be dead soon anyway. I hate fig trees, never had any luck keeping one alive.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 13 Sep 2010, 14:48, Reply)