at the very least
not for a while though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:49, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Yeah, wait 5 years
and then boast about it on the internet
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:50, Reply)

You want some as well then?
For I have many gallons of weedkiller
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:51, Reply)

AND I have a large back garden with a slope in the middle
perfect for a nice big "CUNT" that I would see every morning
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:56, Reply)

don't want to piss on your chips or anything but...
Weed killer generally speaking, kills weeds. Not lawns.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:57, Reply)

It kills everyfuckingthing. Trust me

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Ahhh, so you're a "Roundup" man
I was going to do this when I was 15 (i'm 33 now), I had it all worked out. I was going to put the weedkiller mixture in an empty washing up bottle for the actual deed.

In the end I forgot all about it. Probably for the best.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:04, Reply)

A washing up bottle you say....
*takes notes*
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:06, Reply)

They sell Roundup in those squirty bottles with a trigger mechanism and adjustable nozzle now.
Hang on...wasn't I trying to dissuade you from doing this?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:09, Reply)

Skips merrily to Asda
Filled with hatred and a £1 off coupon.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:11, Reply)

You're filled with a £1 off coupon?
What a disturbing image.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:48, Reply)

how does it differentiate between one type of plant and another?
pretty sure all the weedkiller I've used has had instructions not to spray it on plants you want to keep
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:59, Reply)

oh shit
that's where I've been going wrong.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Although I'm writing a letter to my old letting agent
and I'm so gosh damn angry, I'm only going to put "Yours" not "Yours sincerely"
(PsychoChomp, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:51, Reply)

OUCH

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:52, Reply)

why not put
"dear sir" and "yours faithfully"

that is truly COLD.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:52, Reply)

"yours, etc."
Cuts them dead. You can't even be BOTHERED to finish it. That's how nonplussed you are.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:53, Reply)

remind me not to get on the wrong side of you

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:54, Reply)

but
then you still have to sign it. need a nice illegible signature (mine looks like a wavy line, courtesy of years doing tenant arrears letters, so they couldn't track me down and stab me)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:54, Reply)

I've got a scanned version of my sig, though.
So if I'm REALLY apathetic about you, I'll just drop it in as an image and you'll never know. Take that.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:56, Reply)

Mine too
I was a cheque signatory for years and as such my signature has deteriorated into what looks like one of those hospital heartbeat monitor pulse thingies.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:57, Reply)

I don't sign things often
so mine has an enormous flourish on the end. Praise be to surnames ending in Y!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:00, Reply)

I cross the last three Ts of my name
with a huge Z shaped scribble. It's like Zorro came and stabbed it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:05, Reply)

I approve of this

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:05, Reply)

yes
exactly that. mine doesn't fit on the back of my card at all.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:07, Reply)

ooo, that's harsh

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:53, Reply)

No, I know his name,
I'm not going against everything I've ever learnt in school.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:54, Reply)

if you're writing to a company
though... anyway. it's your letter!

/puts down lawyer hat
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:55, Reply)

he went out of his way to keep his real name away from me.
I'm not letting him think he has won.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 15:59, Reply)

No form of anger sears in quite the same way
As a proper, British letter of formal complaint. Unfortunately most lettings agents are emotionally retarded and may not respond to it in the normal way.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:02, Reply)

He responded to my claim for £2780
with a transfer of £900.
These letters are saying cheers for that you still owe me £2780 though.
yours etc.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:03, Reply)

£900 is a good start
but he's treating you like a sucker if he thinks he can just pay that and you'll wag your tail and go away.

the reality is that if you hadn't sued him, he wouldn't have paid at all.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:06, Reply)

He's sent you £900 but still owes you the full original amount?
That's some rate of interest you're charging.
(Cave Duck, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:06, Reply)

contractual sum -v- statutory penalty
two different animals!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:07, Reply)

That's my deposit returned
the £2780 is a penalty payment for not protecting my deposit.
but hey ho it doesn't matter the £900 has bounced over the weekend so never mind.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 16:20, Reply)

In my very limited experience
legal action is useful against those who wont pay, but often not worth persuing against those who can't pay.
(Cave Duck, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 17:05, Reply)