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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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You've just blown a BBC researcher,
and now you're going to stay at his for two nights?
Swift work, batty-man. Why don't you just interview for 'Strictly' like everyone else, though?
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:18,
2 replies,
latest was 15 years ago)
I initially thought this
Then realised that it was a bit too obvious, even for me.
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:19,
Reply)
I am here to help.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:20,
Reply)
help constantly belittle people who I believe are inferior to myself (so everyone).
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:21,
Reply)
everyone mainly TGB
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:22,
Reply)
so mainly TGB especially AA
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:25,
Reply)
so especially AA I fucking hate TGB
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:26,
Reply)
hate love
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:26,
Reply)
+and I intend on feeding her all 3 inches of my member
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:28,
Reply)
all 3 inches of my member lots of yummy food at Tayyabs
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:32,
Reply)
+and then all 3 inches of my member
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:33,
Reply)
You're very insistant you have a small penis
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:35,
Reply)
I'm speaking from the point of view of Monty
As I'm not joining you in London
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:37,
Reply)
yeah yeah whatever
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:39,
Reply)
Ahem.
I have a cock the size of a gorilla's arm.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:40,
Reply)
Well that's just disturbing

(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:42,
Reply)
It's the second one in on the left.
I have a skin condition, you see.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:44,
Reply)
what illness is it,
that withers arms?
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:44,
Reply)
ask Supreme Crow
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:58,
Reply)
hahaha
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:03,
Reply)
I should
even if he gets angry and punches me in the face (emulating another b3tan) it'll be like being gently tapped by a fairycake
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:04,
Reply)
I'll fucking tap you with a fairy cake in a minute
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:08,
Reply)
Doesn't come off too well as a threat, does it?
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:09,
Reply)
You can't apply for Strictly, genius
You can only compete if you're a professional dancer or a D-list celebrity, and I'm a few years away from being either
(
Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:22,
Reply)
There was that So You Think You Can Dance show a bit ago though
that was really good, you could apply for that if it comes on again.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:26,
Reply)
So are you engaged? Or are you actively planning your wedding?
follow up question does your boyfriend know about it?
(
PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:28,
Reply)
stop following me into other threads.
I'm not engaged but Wiggy is fully aware that my hypothetical wedding is roughly planned out. Should he actually choose to propose at some point that would be convenient.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:33,
Reply)
Play all the single ladies
everytime he gets home from work.
(
PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:36,
Reply)
haha
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:39,
Reply)
Have you seen the standard on So You Think You Can Dance?
Everyone on there is a) much, much better than me and b) also considerably younger. They've all been dancing their whole lives, I only took up Ballroom when I was 25. Nice idea though
(
Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:30,
Reply)
Yeah they did seem pretty awesome
Made me wish I'd learned dance from when I was tiny. Something to force onto my kids though!
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:34,
Reply)
Yeah me too
Apart from the kids, I'm not having any apparently
(
Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:37,
Reply)
how come?
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:38,
Reply)
the UN have forbidden it
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:40,
Reply)
For the safety of us all.
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:41,
Reply)
This is perfectly viable
However the explanation is much more simple; I don't have a womb
(
Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:50,
Reply)
It's because he insists on doing his bird up the shitter
and calling her 'Gary' at the same time
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:52,
Reply)
She still hasn't figured = /
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:52,
Reply)
Your sort are allowed to adopt now.
(
PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:42,
Reply)
Hahah
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:45,
Reply)
I was going to say that last time this came up
but I was worried it was a medical condition or something and I didn't want to be insensitive.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:49,
Reply)
Of all the theories offered above,
this one made me alugh the most. Points
(
Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:50,
Reply)
And alughter is the best emdicine
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:56,
Reply)
is that a brand name?
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:57,
Reply)
No, it's the motto of DAD
Dyslexic Doctors Agency
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:58,
Reply)
haha
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:02,
Reply)
I was made to dance from when I was tiny
Still didn't make me any good.
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:37,
Reply)
mine will inherit my mad body popping skills
I might be one of those terrible mothers who teaches her kids to pole dance aged 5.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:38,
Reply)
Ah well, it'll empower them as females.
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:39,
Reply)
they'll be the most empowered children on the planet.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:49,
Reply)
you should get them rings of power
not heart though, that would be shit
(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:53,
Reply)
hahaha
I love CP references
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:55,
Reply)
You love CP?!?!?!?!
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:57,
Reply)
It's only because of you I know what this means
*vomits*
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:00,
Reply)
Not really.
Most people who've dabbled in 4chan or the darker areas of the Internet know it stands for Captain Picard.
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:01,
Reply)
I mean I'd never heard anyone else refer to it as such
And it's only since that I've ventured into the darker areas of the internet
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:02,
Reply)
He's my hero
(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:00,
Reply)
Gonna take pollution down to zero.
(
wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:04,
Reply)
MODZ!!!!!
(
PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:01,
Reply)
v&
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:01,
Reply)
There are many, many worse abbreviations than CP.
(
wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:04,
Reply)
DP
Also something Lampito knows
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:05,
Reply)
:O
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:07,
Reply)
DOUBLE PUNCH!
I hear she like it two-fisted.
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wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:10,
Reply)
I read that in a racist chinese accent then
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:15,
Reply)
Northerner in racist shocker.
Yeah yeah you're a southener really, heard it all before, whatever.
(
wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:16,
Reply)
When you meet me at the bash you'll probably think I sound like a northerner
whereas the northerners will think I'm a southern fairy. So I'll probably be shunned by both.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:17,
Reply)
I was going to shun you anyway, I wouldn't worry about that.
Are you bringing a whippet on a string?
(
wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:19,
Reply)
i get that all the time
people at home think i am a poxy southerner. people in london think i am a pigeonfancying northener.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:22,
Reply)
People from b3ta think you're a bread-obsessed deviant...
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wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:25,
Reply)
9/10
isn't bad i suppose
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:39,
Reply)
Don't worry.
I still love you, despite your regional disability.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:25,
Reply)
a bit of rich northern blood
is just what you pale southerners need!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:39,
Reply)
WGW?
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:07,
Reply)
My old housemate had to have regular DVDAP
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wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:09,
Reply)
I take it you were careful only sitting her on large seats, so she wouldn't swallow them?
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:10,
Reply)
Had to look that up.
Eep.
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:12,
Reply)
That's a shock
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:13,
Reply)
Good thing you're a student then.
I can't imagine google has any sfw results.
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wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:14,
Reply)
Hey, I'm going in soon.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:17,
Reply)
Well I am in the NSDAP.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:18,
Reply)
All of it?
For fuck's sakes man, frantic editing, post deletion, what's going on here?
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wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:20,
Reply)
I'm confused, old boy.
I think I have 'Pratchett's Disease'
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:22,
Reply)
It was only a matter of time before all those years started to take their toll, I suppose.
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wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:24,
Reply)
True indeed.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:25,
Reply)
TSGB
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Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:10,
Reply)
TransSexual Grammar Badger?
*runs*
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:11,
Reply)
bastard
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:12,
Reply)
Transexual Gender-Bending?
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:12,
Reply)
she could make them wear mini corsets
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:56,
Reply)
that would be awesome
their bones will be all squishy and malleable at that age, I can proper deform them!
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:58,
Reply)
Haha
use the cupcake themed material and send them out as walking adverts. You could have a double page spread in 'Take a Break' in months
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:02,
Reply)
I'll be the best dressed contestant on Jeremy Kyle
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:08,
Reply)
You could wear an Oddjob bowler hat
and take his head off with it.
(
Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:10,
Reply)
I watched the original of that the other day
I am impressed at the MAD SKILLZ demonstrated
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:17,
Reply)
me too
it's pretty hard to throw an envelope on target and he would have looked pretty silly if it had just fluttered past and onto the floor. Still wish it had been a chair though. The chav kind of looked like Ethan Hawke if he fell on hard times.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:20,
Reply)
Even if Ethan Hawke
became a crack addict, he still would look nowhere near as bad as that guy
(
Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:22,
Reply)
I am a huge fan of Howard Sakata.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:21,
Reply)
I was doing a pub quiz last night and the question was 'what was Jeremy Kyle assaulted with this week'
and the team we marked had written "a chair". That would have been brilliant.
(
Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:19,
Reply)
Especially if he had also followed it up with
"You throw it at me, I'll throw it at you. Yer mum."
(
LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:21,
Reply)
Did you immediatly start crying about the girl calling you a twat?
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PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 11:38,
Reply)
I did ballet every day for a year
I'm still ungraceful
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:41,
Reply)
I used to horseride, dance, and paint a lot.
I also used to cut up bits of animal and draw diagrams, do chemistry experiments and play with LEGO. I had a rich and varied childhood, and I hardly ever watched TV.
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:44,
Reply)
no TV in our house
middle-class :(
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:45,
Reply)
I got into the habit of watching the News each day.
Only broke it ast year :/
(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:49,
Reply)
I should thank my parents
it gave me an excellent grounding- a mind that got a lot of other opportunities than TV and a body that still serves me in good stead metabolism wise, with all the basics I'll need if I ever get back in shape
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:54,
Reply)
un dis
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:50,
Reply)
that as well
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 10:52,
Reply)
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