oh no what happened to your house??
hello everyone
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:09, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Evening.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:09, Reply)

hello you
good evening?

i need a drink. naively i agreed to go and talk to my neighbour about lease extensions. this is why you should never meet your neighbours in london. i have just spent the last 3 hours explaining the LRHUDA 1993 to about 15 people that she invited for a free legal presentation. urgh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:11, Reply)

Did you hand out business cards?
for all your legal needs, we care, etc etc.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:12, Reply)

yup
it was a stealth pitch as we would be about 3500 whereas high street firms could do it for about 850. so i had to keep saying "i'm here as your friend and neighbour, not an ambassador for my firm. BUT..."

many of them took cards. heh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:14, Reply)

Christmas cards?
It's only October for God's sake.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)

business cards
you know, like the ones you swipe from phoneboxes on a nightly basis.

only more legalistic.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)

Oh, THOSE
I get it
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)

once a year doesn't count as "Getting It"

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:25, Reply)

hahahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)

Oh and nice usage of the verb 'to swipe'.
I'd love to get swiped.

Speaking of which, did you see that you were the subject of a QOTW post last week?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:25, Reply)

about my underwear? kitty pointed it out.
he repeated it this week, called me a bitch for ignoring him! (in a jokey way)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)

Did he?
So you have a creepy stalker. I know the feeling.

Linkypoos?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:27, Reply)

look at that word you just used.
look at it.

THAT is the reason i am now putting you back on ignore where you belong!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:31, Reply)

What's wrong with the word 'creepy'?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:32, Reply)

it means "plumdozer" in many languages

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)

I am hurt.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:41, Reply)

My stalker bought me a Bounty bar this week
I hate coconut in confectionery
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:40, Reply)

eeeow
nibble the chocolate off it and bin the rest.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)

I feel rotten
I've not drunk alcohol this evening as I feel THAT poorly.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:19, Reply)

omg
still ill?

it was that email i sent, wasn't it?!?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)

It's forced me into sobriety.
I think decision making this week has left me vunerable and I've been caught out by a bug.

Do you think a bottle of red wine might help?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)

nuke it with vofka

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:24, Reply)

I've got no vodka in at the moment.
It'll have to be wine or cider.

Or whisky.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)

or vodka even

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)

haha
well spotted darling. sadly i've had nothing of the sort this evening, no excuse for fat-fingered shit typing!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:27, Reply)

What do you take with your vodka usually?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:28, Reply)

i like it neat and on the rocks with a straw
and my icy cold diet coke separately, on the side.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:29, Reply)

What brand of vodka wins for you?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:31, Reply)

well.
funny you should ask. fri night, cocktail bar. waiter asks if i have a pref, naively i say "you choose."

yeah. he chose alright. at sixty fucking pounds a shot!!

i had three.... :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:32, Reply)

What vodka costs sixty quid a shot?
I'd like to know so I can avoid it (unless it was worth it of course).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:34, Reply)

or someone else was paying

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:36, Reply)

fuck knows
snow leopard or something? they have a gin that costs 140!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)

that is so expensive
it makes me cry.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:38, Reply)

decent cocktails in london are going to set you back twelve quid or more
not 140 for one shot, that is just daft.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:40, Reply)

cocktails are delicious
I had a lovely Brandy Alexander a couple of weeks back
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:41, Reply)

my friend had one of those on fri!
strong. lethal.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)

but oh so lovely
nowhere does a good mojito in Oxford though. Not even Raouls :(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:44, Reply)

Twelve quid you can live with
A fiver a pint isn't a figure I'm that uncomfortable with either.

But 140 for a shot of mother ruin? Ouch!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)

I'll bet the diet-coke was extra too :)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:40, Reply)

I'm guessing this wasn't in a Witherspoons then!
:)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:39, Reply)

proper orange juice is always good

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:30, Reply)

Did you get some pasta today Amberl?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:27, Reply)

haha
I still have no money. Thus no pasta
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:29, Reply)

omg this is dreadful
i should send you a food parcel? i have hotel chocolat chocolates and waitrose special giant pasta shells.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:30, Reply)

Haha don't worry
my parents put some money in a recorded delivery post so should be here by thursday (no next day delivery from ireland sadly :( ) Thanks anyway though!
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:32, Reply)

well if you need pasta or chocolate
let me know!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:36, Reply)

Phone a friend and ask them to order you a pizza that can get delivered to you place.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:33, Reply)

I phoned my brother
and asked him to. But his card had been through the wash and had to be chucked out. He offered to get a friend to do it, but it was a bit of a fuss so I thought, nah fuck it
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)

Water is dribbling from lots of places
There must be some cosmic reason. it's too coincidental. I should just chill. Not MY carpet, but the landlord's. If they want it soggy they can be lax.
But I haz no heating until it's fixed :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:12, Reply)

presumably you've told them
so they can't blame you. muppets.

sounds like you are getting someone else's punishment.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)

Every time something breaks in this house that Jack built it is treated with petulant annoyance

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:16, Reply)

ask him if he is familiar
with the provisions of sections 11-14 of the landlord and tenant act 1985...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:18, Reply)

Nah it's all too pally and verbal for me to even go there
They dropped my rent when my ex moved out 6 years ago.
I appreciate all they do but I deserve sanitation. She alwas tuts and says "Well, you can use our shower" whenever the cowboy patch-up breaks again.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)

oh dear
patch-jobs never work. penny-wise, pound-foolish!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:24, Reply)

They're loaded and all

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:33, Reply)

that's probably why!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:34, Reply)

Just what I was going to say!

That may not be true
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)

Do you not still have the fire?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:18, Reply)

hello trouble
i knew you'd be lurking somewhere nearby
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:19, Reply)

Always, m'dear
I'm enjoying having eyes that don't feel like they're going to explode this evening. It's utterly joyous.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)

what was wrong with your evil bulging eyes??

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:23, Reply)

Some sort of infection
Thinking your eyeball's going to burst is pretty scary.

Another busy day in the land of law?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)

eeeeeow
glad it's fixed. occasionally i get stress/tension headaches behind my eyes and it literally feels as if they are going to pop, it's horrible.

law....... yeah, as always, plus ca change, c'est le meme merde.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:28, Reply)

Ah yes, I know what that's like too
Dunno how I managed to get an infection though. Damn eyes.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:33, Reply)

opportunistic bastard germs

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:34, Reply)

Worst of all the bacteria

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)

that should be the sig
for a fair number of individuals on here
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:43, Reply)

I've got the best of them though
TAKE THAT, BACTERIA!
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:49, Reply)

from the genus of boy band viruses such as
boyzIImanflu and AIDSzone
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 0:03, Reply)

Yeah but I'd have to sleep in the living room with the soggy carpet
It's too depressing.
I need to mtfu and remember all the great things I have.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)

Wrap up in a blanket
And pretend that you're a kid again. Good times.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:25, Reply)

blanket fort
with a hot water bottle
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:28, Reply)

Get in!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:33, Reply)

See, turns your evening right around

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 23:34, Reply)