I made the fatal mistake of mentioning tattoos and peircings on some dating sites.
Which obviously must mean I'M A FUCKING SEX MANIAC.


And before anyone says anything......I'M NOT. Just forum banter innit.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:08, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

How many dating sites are there over there?
Around here the only ones well known are match and eharmony
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:13, Reply)

I only tried them and one other I can't remember the name of.
It destroyed what little confindence I managed to scrape off the bottom of my shoe after my last relationship.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:16, Reply)

And a reason why I'd never join any in the first place!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:17, Reply)

No one warned me : (

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:19, Reply)

I can cope with rejection in a pub as I can always get myself another pint.
But online rejection?

Especially if I was expected to pay to be there.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:21, Reply)

I thought online would be easier than face to face? I think you have to have the attitude of "got to be in it to win it" so to speak with the online stuff.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:25, Reply)

You've seen me.
I'm no Cindy Crawford but then again I'm not paper bag material also. I even got Noel to check my profile in case anything stood out as offputting but I got fuck all interest and the few I did get were fucking sex mad.

I got one date and he couldn't wait to leave.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:26, Reply)

No you're not paper bag material. How long did you try online dating for and how many different sites did you try?
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:28, Reply)

Three sites for over a year.

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:28, Reply)

well theyre wrong
You were pretty hot I thought (though that sounds creepy) you know what I mean.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:34, Reply)

Fanku : )
Applebite and Kitty said something similar and it means a lot coming you and them.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:36, Reply)

She was certainly not the biggest minger at the bash. I will refrain from saying who was.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:37, Reply)

Oh you have to NOW.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:38, Reply)

I am a cunt, but not that much of a cunt
yet
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:39, Reply)

Hehe!

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:40, Reply)

Male or female?
Because, at risk of a newspaper-bopping from Gonz, I was the least attractive female there.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:41, Reply)

Pshaw!
Now I'm going to bop you on the bloody head if you go on.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:42, Reply)

Will you caress it better with your tits afterwards?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:43, Reply)

*snigger*
Dirty girl!
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:44, Reply)

No you weren't. Blokes don't do it for me so I don't really look at chaps in that way. There was one bloke there who was a cunt though and that was...

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:43, Reply)

...
...
...GO ON!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:44, Reply)

You've really got us eating out of your hand here.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:44, Reply)

Maybe later when I have had more booze.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:45, Reply)

That's a deliberate untruth and you know it.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:45, Reply)

See below.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:56, Reply)

Sir, sir, I know sir!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:48, Reply)

Please continue...

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:49, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post928955#post928962
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:54, Reply)

Yep. It was Wormulus. He's a fucking wanker.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:56, Reply)

And you're full of shit, all of the women there were cracking.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:01, Reply)

Fuck off. All I have said is that I won't spill who I think was the least attractive woman (in my opinion based on my tastes) was that night

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:03, Reply)

You do realise that Chompy isn't actually a women?

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:04, Reply)

He will be once he's finished shopping at Transformation though

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:08, Reply)

You said you might.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:06, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post948997
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:06, Reply)

Okay. For clarity, my definition of minger regarding those at the bash is who think was the least attractive woman in my opinion based on my tastes. If minger is the wrong word then fine.

Also bear in mind that these judgements are made on personal taste and your taste is probably different to mine.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:10, Reply)

You're amazingly easy to wind up today.
I wasn't even trying.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:12, Reply)

Yes I am.
EDIT: we do agree about Wormulus though.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:13, Reply)

I mean, I literally wasn't trying to bug you.
Everyone's entitled to their opinion :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:26, Reply)

Battered.
That is almost a Bob comment.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:40, Reply)

Careful now.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:42, Reply)

So, what about the 'alternative lifestyle' thing?
Would you not give that another go
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:30, Reply)

Eh?

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:31, Reply)

I think he means drinking from the furry cup

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:32, Reply)

Oh! no not going back there.
Sex was ok but I don't think I could have a relationship with another woman.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:33, Reply)

You see, I think I'd quite like a relationship with a woman.
It's the sex I couldn't do.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:34, Reply)

aww :(
I'm worried again now, I fear I may have just been lucky first time round
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:17, Reply)

Don't you worry, I'm just jinxed.

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:20, Reply)

I know several people that have had good quality long term relationships as a result so don't give up

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:20, Reply)

I told you I was jinxed.
Actually I might have that on my headstone.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:21, Reply)

I didn't mention that a couple of my gf's single friends use them and they are truly mental.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:23, Reply)

ALL wimmin are mental.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:34, Reply)

you should set up your own site then. I am tempted to suggest some URL's but will resist.

for now
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:18, Reply)

I'm not ready just yet to start internet dating
but I'd consider it if it'd get me dates :(
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:19, Reply)

REBOUND REBOUND REBOUND !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:35, Reply)

You trying to bag yourself a Brit so you can get a visa :)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:17, Reply)

that would be rather rude, don't you think?
I've pretty much given up on the idea that I will ever have an "other half" anyway
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:24, Reply)

Men are dreadful and bitches be trippin' balls.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:25, Reply)

I don't think all men are, just the men that seem to be interested in me

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:28, Reply)

Have you "tried for the other side"? Might be more of an option

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:31, Reply)

well, to be honest, I like dick
perhaps it's time to get that gastric band and plastic surgery I've been wondering about....
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:35, Reply)

But Richard doesn't like you?
Move on, there will be others.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:36, Reply)

There's certainly plenty of dicks in the states.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:38, Reply)

that's what I'm doing
moving on
just not onto anyone else
sort of stuck in limbo here
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:50, Reply)

Keep your chin up
Things will improve.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:55, Reply)

doubtful
it's been 12 years of watching my friends get involved, get married, have children
and here I am, wouldn't be so bad if I'd had gotten anything from any person I've ever been with
but that's just what they are, not relationships or boyfriends, just people I've been with.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:00, Reply)

This is true for me without fail.
Any man I show an interest in will either like me as a friend or treat me with utter disdain.
Any man who shows an interest me I will find so skincrawlingly horrid I can't bear to be around them.
Men will lie to me over whether or not they like me, but will tell the truth only after I get my hopes up.
Men seem to regret ever having anything to do with me. Unless they're a bit odd and try and add you back on facebook after you spectacularly remove them from my life.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:33, Reply)

men boys
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:34, Reply)

Maybe.
I had more luck with boys (under or around 18) than I ever did with those over that age.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:36, Reply)

ugh see
what's the fucking point
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:47, Reply)

I rid him of his virginity, and what does he do?
Fucker isn't even grateful.

/could apply to 2 people in this instance.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:48, Reply)

do not like
I had devirginised the mouth of one and then he tells me he wants to give me love forever
after one date
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:50, Reply)

O_O
I've introduced several to the heady (lol) world of blowjobs. It's a lot of fun.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:51, Reply)

oh my hahahaha

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:53, Reply)

I have a hilarious story
I say hilarious story, it's awful and dark and distrubing and I shouldn't really keep bringing up as it's only me who finds it hilarious.

but yes involving the subject of my post above, lolololol
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:55, Reply)

spill.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:57, Reply)

I will if you do.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:14, Reply)

I have said above who the cunt was; Wormulus, I have decided not to say who I thought who the least attractive woman was
I think I should leave the internet for a while in a bit. Getting tetchy.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:19, Reply)

Sorry for pushing it.
I was curious. Don't leave.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:20, Reply)

I'm tired that's all.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:24, Reply)

That's just creepy.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:53, Reply)

How old are you?

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:25, Reply)

old enough

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:28, Reply)

+ to know better, young enough not to care?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:32, Reply)

no, just old enough to know what I'm talking about

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:47, Reply)

You sound really low.
Fingers crossed a good nights sleep sorts you out.

Failing that, use violence against your housemates.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:50, Reply)

not really, just being honest

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:52, Reply)

What, in an ideal world, would be the qualities you'd want from a significant other?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:33, Reply)

what anyone else would want
love, respect, honesty, a working cock
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:49, Reply)

so if you aren't bothered about looks and a sense of humour
I fail to see why you've failed to bag a keeper.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:51, Reply)

gee, maybe because I'm fat and ugly?
lol but really
it's because I'm fat and ugly :)
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 19:53, Reply)

All women think they're fat and ugly.
99% of them aren't.

Try being a bloke, not only are most of us ugly, but generally speaking we have the same hairstyle for years and only own a couple of pairs of shoes.

At least ladies can do something different with their hair and make-up, we are largely stuck with how we've been born!

This is why men can grow beards. I may have made that bit up.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:00, Reply)

pfft I'd rather be a bloke

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:05, Reply)

I've always said I should have been a bloke.
I'd be really handsome as a bloke.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 20:08, Reply)