More Vile Abuse
And don't forget

Joey

As in "You fucking Joey"

Can anyone remember the origins of this? I can, but I want to see how old everyone else is...
(The_Bishop begged for death on, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 16:03, Reply)

Vile Abuse
Personally I like the following;

Fuck-knuckles
Twatskull
Hawking-But-Walking
Cockmaster

Although my all time favourite is;

Cuntychops
(The_Bishop begged for death on, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 16:01, Reply)

A few...
Mad as ten bears

Mad as a box of frogs

If she's on the blob: Invaded by the communists

And I have started to use the word bonza quite a lot
(mr pete, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:47, Reply)

Too Many Ponies, Not Enough guns
"Too Many Ponies, Not Enough Guns" - an event or situation that does not live up to expectations or requirements.

EG:
"That pub had too many ponies and not enough guns"
"You are the pony, I am the gun".
(Endjinn, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:29, Reply)

Gay as a...
Inspired by a poster outside the Playhouse in Edinburgh featuring some incredibly cheesy looking chap. Paul something-or-other, can't remember.

Gay as a biscuit
Gay as a window
Gay as chips

Not intended to be homophobic but seriously, you should have seen the poster. Camp as a turret...
(blunt_sprocket, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:27, Reply)

My Head's a Dog
well not mine but someone elses

(you only know the feeling if its happened to you)
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:27, Reply)

up on the blocks
used to describe arsey women - the assumption being it's rag week and she has pants like a butchers apron
(mr matt, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:23, Reply)

bobfoc
jus me who uses BOBFOC?
Body Of Baywatch Face Off Crimewatch?
doubt it...
be nice i'm new :)
(Guu Bounce back - With Prozac!!, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:18, Reply)

Ewwwology
When something is gross our kids give it the Ewwww rating from 1 to 10. For instance, the cat hurling up a hairball would rate an Ewwww factor 5, stepping on the hairball with bare feet - Ewwww factor 9. Seeing someone pick their nose would be an Ewwww factor 8, seeing them eat the boogar - Ewwww factor 10.
(weebug, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:01, Reply)

DOG.
Dog - used as a description for "unpleasant conditions".


eg:

In a case of a bad smell - "It's a bit dog in here"


In a case of a cold/rainy/windy day - "It's DOG out there."


In a case of one feeling unwell - "I is dog."



Catching on around the playground of Sheffield University. It's a nice word to say in a bad way.
(purplecow, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 15:00, Reply)

mad, monkeys
Mad as a tree

A can of monkeys, as in if we do that we will just open a whole can of monkeys.

hmmmmmm I will have to have a think I am sure I can remember some more.
(bblac didnt get the new job booo rotten bastards, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 14:55, Reply)

MFMCGs
Mother Fucking Middle-Class Gaylords - a useful utterance applying to a whole host of MFMCG behaviours, but then there are a tons of acronyms aren't there?
(Rata-tat-atouille, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 14:30, Reply)

Painters are in....
My lovely male workmate aften says this to me when I reach that special time of month.
"painters are in then Alex?"
(saucykipper, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 14:30, Reply)

Oh boy
When I'm about to bollock a load of students for not turning up to lectures, we describe it as an "attitude readjustment session"

We're not allowed to use the words "stupid" or "rubbish" when marking work (it offends the sensitive souls), so I use phrases such as "this work demonstrates a number of outstanding knowledge opportunities"
( groovegenerator The man who mistook his wife for his wife, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 14:12, Reply)

ooh, I like this topic.
My favourite slang phrase I heard recently is "she was wetter than an otter's pocket". In my opinion that phrase is as good as the phrase "feeding the pony" (as in rubbing a girl between the legs).

Batch catchers is a good term for condoms, as is fucksox.

And if all else fails, and you can't remember the word you are looking for just use the word TRITS. It can mean anything you want it to mean.
(Nacho, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:59, Reply)

and another
"a bit council" - to look cheap & nasty, as though it belongs on/comes from a council estate. Can be used for describing people or inanimate objects:

"look at her over there - she looks a bit council"

"I don't like these shelves - they're a bit council"
(ricky_darkholer is blonde on the inside, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:59, Reply)

twunt
surely there is no finer slang, than that which combines two excellent slang-isms anyway . . . i bring you

Twunt!

woo!

be nice i'm new.
(thrasheruk2000, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:50, Reply)

Rubble Sack.
Like "double bagger" for persons of questionable beauty, but used for more industrial scale purposes.

"That lass over there, nice body, but she really needs a rubble sack for that face."

Obviously I never use this sort of term.
I heard some bigger boys saying it, and wanted to look cool.
( Prof. Slocombe, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:50, Reply)

BISH
Bish, meaning fookin wicked, excelent ect.

The word evolved from majestic, which in turn led to Madge which then led to Bishop as in Madge Bishop from Neighbours fame the next obvious step of course was of course BISH the rest is History.

Have really found this website funny, full of frantic Internet wanking geeks! Am worried that now I have posted I am one too! Don't think so!
(benjoi, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:50, Reply)

"Niggi" or "Nigi"
I happened to be walking by a group of young black people who were apparently getting into some kind of a clamjamfry (see below about 5-6 posts)and one of them called another by the name "niggi".
It must mean something really bad, cuz they all went "ooooooooohhh!"
(retro, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:45, Reply)

Spaz? Div? Flid?
These aren't new slang terms are they really? Otherwise please put me down as the first to hear fuck, piss, poo and willy

Oh, and my parents used to tell me that when an ice-cream van plays its jingle it means. . .
(le renard, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:39, Reply)

Ugly
Just remembered another, also used a lot by an ex:

"She didn't just get hit with the ugly stick, she hit every branch on the way down"
(ricky_darkholer is blonde on the inside, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:38, Reply)

Beef Curtains!
Mm-mmmmmmmmm........ can't u just smell em??
(Mr Shmiff, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:20, Reply)

also
Phunamic!

B3ta is incredibly phunamic!
( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:01, Reply)

Biccies
as in mental "he just went totally biccies" later gave rise to bicuits "that woman's completely biscuits"

also
face like a bag of spanners
as mad as a bag of cats
( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 13:01, Reply)

Clamjamfry: used by me & mates...
...to describe a "not quite a fight" where there's lots of jumper pulling and shouting. Came from MacGonnagle (sp?) the Dundee "poet".

Also, cheese sandwich to describe a scoper, or cheese baguette for an extreme scoper. Addition of branston, salad etc denotes level of spackdom. Origins unknown...

And finally, when Rizla, dope, or time only allow a wee spliff, you have a single-tingle

(first post, be gentle)
( wbm, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 12:59, Reply)

Set on fire and beaten out with the ugly bat
I favour "face like a welder's bench"

We also adopted a scale of madness, in increasing order:

Mad as a bag of weasels
Mad as a box of frogs
Mad as a blender full of bees
and finally
Mad as Cheese. That's pretty damn mad I can tell you.
Although I believe there is an Aussie expression "mad as a cut snake" not sure where that fits in. any suggestions?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 12:57, Reply)

Camp
Has this been done? My favourite non-aggressive description of a gay bloke:

He's as camp as a row of pink tents.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 12:01, Reply)

to 'harry on the boat'
harry monk = spunk
boatrace = face

sorry - i think its time to re engage the lurkdrive.

night.
(magictorch, Thu 5 Feb 2004, 11:28, Reply)

Rikaitch
My nickname comes from my tutor at College. I was forever botching (fixing temporarily) something hours before it was to be presented, only to find it worked better the new way, so was left like it. He used to look at the project and say "You've Rik H'd That." ANyone that knows me now regularly refers to dodgy fixes as Rikaitches
(Rikaitch is full of crap ideas., Thu 5 Feb 2004, 11:17, Reply)