b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Weddings Part II » Post 2412235 | Search
This is a question Weddings Part II

Attending a wedding is like being handed a licence to act like a twat. Oh how I laughed when I sobered up and realised I'd nicked most of the plates and cutlery from the posh hotel lunch and those vague memories of stealthily exiting like a cat-burglar had in fact involved falling out of the hotel, knives and forks clattering onto the steps.

Tell us more of your wedding stories.

(, Mon 3 Nov 2014, 18:10)
Pages: Popular, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

« Go Back

I had a greek mate of mine marry an italian woman. Both families tried to outdo each other in laviousness. It was a bit bonkers
the reception was in some grand stately home, 13 course meal. Roaming peacocks. Violins. The full wedding bullshit. As far as I know both families were middle class suburbanites. The two families together bought the new couple a house and a car.
One year of married bliss later, she had broken his finger in an argument and he told me he keyed down the side of her car outside the Family court where they were getting their divorce.
On an unrelated note, I'm having a party in the park on the weekend and it looks like it's going to piss down, so I looked at a bunch of Wedding marquee hire places. They averaged around 300 for the day for the standard white 3mx6m one, which I couldn't justify. I then looked at another site that was selling an identical model new for 120. I'm buying it and going to hire it out on weekends and undercut the fucking bandits
(, Thu 13 Nov 2014, 22:40, 16 replies)
I presume laviousness meant lavishness
I was kind of hoping it meant lasciviousness and they spent the entire reception touching each other up. Good story, though. And anything that combines the words wedding and hire just trebles the price. When you've made your pile from the marquee, hire a hall and set up a wedding fair. People will pay through the nose just to get through the door.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 1:31, closed)
He said Italians and Greeks. OF COURSE they spent the entire reception touching each other up.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 6:37, closed)

touch bumm
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 10:37, closed)
was also disappointed.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 10:45, closed)
undercut the fucking bandits
but don't forget they are (probably) insured. paying for that,tax, fuel, vehicle and wages probably takes a bit of dollar rather than buying shit for 120 and thinking that's all you need
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 5:53, closed)
Don't forget the entertainment licence as well.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 6:38, closed)
It's just a fucking tent
They come around, they give me the cash and deposit. They put it in their car and bring it the fuck back when they're done. There's really no need for a catering budget on my behalf. I'll even type up a sheet that the user accepts liability if tent poles are inserted in the anus
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 7:02, closed)
3m x 6m?
You don't have many friends, do you?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 8:59, closed)
who said they were my friends?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 11:30, closed)
How very lavious.
Why would anyone plan an outdoor function for November?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:06, closed)
sort of cunt who is precious about his lascivious shag pile.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:17, closed)
Can't help feeling that a lascivious shag would be a tautology.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 9:52, closed)
of course I probably meant lavish. who knows

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 12:39, closed)
someone in the southern hemisphere, arseface

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 11:30, closed)
All my maps say "Here Be Dragons" for anywhere that isn't Kent.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 21:35, closed)
Brian Cunt was a cant.

(, Sun 16 Nov 2014, 16:40, closed)

« Go Back

Pages: Popular, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1