Much love
Goodnight
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 15:15, Reply)

Derniere

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 15:14, Reply)

Chingachgook.

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 15:12, Reply)

LAST
Perhaps?
(JohntheDane, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 15:10, Reply)

No, *I* said LAST.

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 15:07, 4 replies)

I said
LAST
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 15:03, Reply)

Not funny.
Pronouncing b3ta as 'bay-ta' rather than 'bee-ta'.
(paddysawyers music whore, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:58, 8 replies)

129th!

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:52, Reply)

As I'm Bored, I Nearly Did Very Wrong
Qwerty keyboards are damn stupid. But then, so was I. At work, I was busily typing away, my banking missive being along the lines of:

'We regret to say we cannot relate the reference you have supplied with our own records. We cannot investigate this matter further, so please be advised that your letter is now closed and filed.'

Unfortunately, the I and L on a standard Qwerty are rather close to the U and K.

If not for the authentication system, I would have sent out my letter advising the customer that their letter had been closed and fuked.

Sort of a pity I didn't, really...
(IChewCandlewax, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:45, 1 reply)

It's still my master* plan to have enough people click "I like this"
to make a post saying nothing other than LAST the most popular post of the week.

*trades descriptions have been informed of this misappropriation
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:38, Reply)

where
is the new QOTW. B3ta, you're doing it wrongly
(Clashrock is being stalked by his brother on, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:36, Reply)

No

(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:35, 1 reply)

did i win?

( zulu eh?, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:34, Reply)

Second to Last!!
hang on...

Edit: Arse. If it finishes now I'm going to look a right bell-end.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:34, Reply)

Fuck it
LAST
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:32, Reply)

Silly me!
I only went and tried to include a php file, within an extended class while I had strict E_ALL reporting enabled. As you can imagine I was unprepared for the Parse error: syntax error, unexpected T_INCLUDE, expecting T_FUNCTION that I received!
(golddust QOTW now revolves around being a cunt, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:23, 1 reply)

Cheese on Toast
One slice of bread, a few slices of cheese, turn the toaster on its side,insert bread and cheese, turn the toaster on and there you have it; Cheese on Toast.
(Monkey the Chicken Twitter: death_stairs, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:21, 2 replies)

Just now
Tucked a cigarette behind my ear, and nonchalantly moseyed out for a smoke.

Stopped for a pee on the way and it fell out of its perch and into the bowl.

No laughing matter - they work out as about 30p a pop nowadays...
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:16, 3 replies)

Did he get it from Ikea?
Beelzebub has a devil in his sideboard!

From Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody!

Am I singing it wrong?
(Lip Up Fatty Fatty Reggae still loves BBQ food on, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 14:13, 1 reply)

Why is everyone ..........
Waiting 6 days and xxx mins before they come up with a story?

You must be doing it wrong!


.
(Suck it and Sea, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 13:59, 2 replies)

As a child...
...I had Yasser Arafat and Yossou N'Dour confused.

Not to mention Yosser from Boys From The Blackstuff.

"Gissa stretch of land on the West Bank, mate"
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 22 Jul 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Until very recently
I thought Ted Heath and Ted Heath were the same person.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 13:51, 1 reply)

gary numan and gary oldman
for way too long I thought they were the same person.
In my defence they look vaguely similar when oldman is on fifth element...
(bryo, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 13:46, 2 replies)

college
A good 20 years ago, when I was at sixth form college, I spent a lot of time in the music room. Either playing the piano or bending the future Mrs SLVA over it and taking her from behind on a very regular basis. However, it turned out I was doing it wrong. What I should've been doing was going to lessons and getting A levels to go off to Uni to study chemical engineering or some such science.

How we laughed when I left college with no qualifications, no prospects and a kid on the way.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 13:37, 4 replies)

Last!!
Yeay!!!!

Oh .............. Bugger


.
(Suck it and Sea, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 13:33, Reply)

FIRST!
I can never get that right.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 12:15, 2 replies)

Solar Panel
I was just trying to work out why the hell a solar panel in the garden would have an accelerometer inside.

The lights that are powered by it would only switch on when the panel was upside down and facing the floor.
After a bit of head scratching and reading the part of the manual that said the lights automatically come on in low light I realised how dumb I'd been.
( Terry Oblong There's nobody here but us chickens on, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 11:56, Reply)

"tits and fanny, how we dont talk any more"
By Cliff Richard

well, I thought it was
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 11:19, 6 replies)

A friend. Really.
A friend of mine really wants to smoke cannabis. In a party situation, she will always happily accept the joint.

As a non-smoker she hasn't quite got the hang of how one actually transfers from holding a joint to being stoned.

She blows into it. Every time. And then gets the giggles.
( Queen of Cheesecake, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 11:04, 5 replies)