A slight drawback
Men, you know how when you go for a piss, you get the wee man out, pull back your foreskin, aim, and then commence the flow?

Well, when I was younger my aim was frequently well off. I'd squirt streams of piss over the top of the toilet bowl and sometimes even dribble onto the floor.

But then I discovered I'd been doing it wrong. I hadn't been pulling my foreskin back, which meant that I was pissing out of a floppy fold of skin, which was diverting the flow in random directions.

The only thing is, I was well into my 20s until I discovered this. I would blame my dad for not teaching my properly when I was an infant, but I can distinctly remember being a wee lad and watching him pee, and my commenting on him 'putting his willy's jacket on again'.

As a result of my relatively new-found knowledge, I have improved my accuracy significantly.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:08, 21 replies)

 
( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:11, closed)

eh? you're supposed to pull it back?
well, you learn something every day
( kappynitty doubled your entendre on, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:14, closed)

If you pull it back
and then forwards again, repeatedly, I heard it turns your wee into yoghurt.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:16, closed)

First time I pulled it back
I found cheese, not yoghurt
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:17, closed)

Mwhahahaha!

(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:44, closed)

I normally ejaculate before that happens

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:17, closed)

Yep
This made me chuckle I went for years without the pull back and this culminated in being in a cheesy nightclub, going to the toilet and being told by the guy next to me, that I was pissing all over his leg.....he was o.k. about it considering :\



PS I have been successfully performing the pull back for about ten years now.

*Click* for the 1st time I have ever heard a bloke raise this point.
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:28, closed)

oooooh, I can't wait for my next piss to try this out!
Garcon!!!! 12 pints of water please! I have some science to do!
( kappynitty doubled your entendre on, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 15:55, closed)

^^this

( weaver., Fri 16 Jul 2010, 16:28, closed)

Haha!
This is an awesome post
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 16:04, closed)

jesus christ.
i don't know how else to put this, than WTF? unless god blessed you with a rollneck like a fleshy windsock, then wtf? i'm the complete unabridged version of me, and i can piss a match out at five feet. if i piss on your toilet, it's because i'm drunk, or i dislike you.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 16:14, closed)

there's
a fairly wide variation in foreskins. Some so short, that it causes problems if they try to circumcise, and some so long that they completely cover the end and over hang considerably. Google images.
Of course when standing proud, it all looks pretty much the same.
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Sat 17 Jul 2010, 19:02, closed)

Kids today!
How do you get through life having never tried things out?

Ever had a piss and rotated you dick 180 so you're pissing with an upside down dick?


EDIT: also I used to have a P.A. It stretches the skin a a bit. this make for awesome piss mess. Cock like a tea-spout.
(waxdart hello., Fri 16 Jul 2010, 16:47, closed)

I've often thought about getting a Prince Albert
I think the ring would nicely set off my bell end. The one thing that holds me back is that I don't know how to play the clarinet, so pissing would be messy...
(IHaveComeAmongThee__Twice Tissues on the left. Self-esteem on the right., Fri 16 Jul 2010, 18:32, closed)

Ok
But do I put the foreskin back before or after I wring it out?
(zebby wasting irony here on, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 16:49, closed)

No you're supposed
to pinch the end until it inflates like a balloon and let go just before it splits.
( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Fri 16 Jul 2010, 18:50, closed)

^ This!

( Richard Shitheels, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 7:31, closed)

willy jacket
rofls... and lols.
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Sat 17 Jul 2010, 18:59, closed)

Worringly enough, as an 18 year-old male in possession of a penis, I didn't know this was what you were supposed to do. I spent the first 15 years of my life - until I got that bastard jacket lopped off (for a variety of other reasons) - avoiding pissing in anyone else's toilet for fear of leaving a yellow shame puddle on their floor.
I've broken my lurking ways (bugger all stories to tell) to say that you've helpfully reduced my childhood angst. Now if you could just work on a post regarding feelings of guilt after eating beef due to parental warnings about mad cow disease...
(ored, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 21:19, closed)

Surely the foreskin acts like a rifle barrel and helps direct the stream(?)
Or is that just me?
(Vlad the Inhaler forgot his password, Wed 21 Jul 2010, 22:03, closed)

It's possibly just you
Because of the expansion ratio of my cock (i.e how big it is when alert, compared to when it's chilled), I have quite a length of foreskin over the end. So trying to piss through that isn't conducive to good aiming.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 22 Jul 2010, 12:25, closed)