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Neural network, adaptive learning, Terminator 2, GAH!
Adaptive learning means Mario Fucking Kart can let me think I'm the WIN and then shoots me up the arse with a massive dose of FAIL just at the last minute.

This is an example of computers working like they're supposed to.

How have computers failed to work like they're supposed to and given you a remote case of FAIL by doing it?
(I helped save b3ta! Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:20, archived)
oh christ, I'm so sorry, I got totally fucking bored about 10 words into that

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:20, archived)
Bzzzzzzz
(I know you're Bou bees - checked the IP address)
(I helped save b3ta! Bou : nobody ever says anything about dirty old women, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
Gilgamesh bees? Gilgabees? Gilbees?
I don't know. I'm guessing. Help me out here someone.
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
Did you look around when you said that?
With a big goofy, jock smile on your face? LOON
(I helped save b3ta! Bou : nobody ever says anything about dirty old women, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:24, archived)
IMMA CHECKIN YO IP ADDREZZ

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:26, archived)
so, out of interest, what is my IP address?

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:27, archived)
and the subnet mask

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:27, archived)
please

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:27, archived)
127.0.0.1

(I helped save b3ta! Bou : nobody ever says anything about dirty old women, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAHAHAAAA
MORON
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
LOL

(I helped save b3ta! Bou : nobody ever says anything about dirty old women, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:35, archived)
Ha ha ULTIMATE FAIL

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:33, archived)
Oh dear.
Oh bloody dear.
(I helped save b3ta! Templeton Blah, blah, blah..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:34, archived)
*snort*

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:34, archived)
well this proves it, EVERYONE is bou bees
everyone on the entire internet
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:35, archived)
*ahem*
www.tech-faq.com/127.0.0.1.shtml
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:34, archived)
open up a command prompt
type in "ping localhost"

be astounded
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:34, archived)
There's no place like 127.0.0.1

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:36, archived)
I assumed you were joking

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:38, archived)
oh god bou this is the best thing you've ever done

(I helped save b3ta! Barry Chuckle III - the troll with a soul., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:38, archived)
I love that they thought she meant it.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:43, archived)
i don't understand why this is funny
JOINGING IN
(hot white cum, YEAH! i will show you 0wnage in a handful of posts, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:43, archived)
SHE'S A MOD YOU KNOW!

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:28, archived)
I thought she was off her ROCKER?
/if you believe the talk of /talk
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
She's not had any sPUNK in her in years

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
To be honest she's MEnTAL

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
Stop it or you'll make her BLUE. NOTE my new caring persona.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:33, archived)
I'm going to console my fat self in some baked alaSKA

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:34, archived)
Is that nouveau alaska or CLASSIC ALaska

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:35, archived)
Is she knoweledgable of modern TECH? NO, I don't think so.

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:38, archived)
Wouldn't that mean you've got mod privileges?

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:24, archived)
I was going to say, how can someone check and trace the IP of a post?

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:24, archived)
BOU IS A LIAR WHO HAS ME ON LOLIGNORE IN FULL CAPS.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:25, archived)
internet fairies

(I helped save b3ta! elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:25, archived)
cr3 can

(I helped save b3ta! Hankster, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:27, archived)
cR3 IS bou?!

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:28, archived)
did some one just say "cr3 is bou"?
*gets out paddle*
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
Arf!

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
Pfft

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)
jesus

(hot white cum, YEAH! i will show you 0wnage in a handful of posts, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
Bou cr3s.
See what I did there?
(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
it's a piece of piss, it appears in the server logs every time a page or image is requested by your browser
mods can see it, Bou can't
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
I meant, someone who wasn't a mod
and was a bit of an attention seeking looper
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
How?
You're not a mod.
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:25, archived)
She's a liar, is what she is.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:25, archived)
LIES?!
ON THE INTERNET?!
THAT'S IT, I'M TELLING MY UNCLE IN THE MAFIA TO SHOOT YOU ALL.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:27, archived)
Is this how you found out that Badger was having an affair?

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:28, archived)
WITH MOOHALAA
of all people
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
The fat gay slut

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
I thought, fuck, Badger clearly has no standards if
he's been knobbing that porky webcam boy
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)
Then you realised that he was supposed to be having an affair with you
and not Syncubus?
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
Is that what she thinks?
You'd be so lucky, Badger is way out of your league.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)
I'D RATHER BE SINGLE!

and barren
and loopy
and losing touch with the fabric of reality
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:33, archived)
Like Bou then?

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:33, archived)
whoop whoop! kaffirs!

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:36, archived)
I'm Bou bees,

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
Actually, I am.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
Fine you take the credit then

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
you are such a miserable cunt
i think i love you
(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
Yeah, Gilgamesh
Your posts are so much better.

No wait, I meant you're a miserable cunt, why don't you just ignore the shit rather posting needlessly offensive replies. You fucking cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:28, archived)
he's the best miserable cunt on here

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:29, archived)
this constitutes LIES and very possibly SLANDER
I'll see you in court you outrageous homosexual
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
Ptchaw. He's a trailing fifth after me, Bud, Hankster, and bogus.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:30, archived)
I'd like to see a half-hour primetime slot
with Jeremy Paxman saying "So, what do you think about..."

and you lot sitting grumping over it
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
God.
I'd perform binary fission just so I could take part and be a viewer at the same time.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:33, archived)
you three have the market pretty well cornered
mid-table glory in the league of misery is the best I can hope for
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
What about MongyChops?

(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:35, archived)
Oh yeah.
He's not been around that much though. He was always the best old-skool miseryguts.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:42, archived)
*Votes for this*
If we're having miserable cunts, which we always will, I'd like them all to be Gilgamesh. In different hats.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)

Which is like being Best Supporting Act to Jim Davidson
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)
hello
I'm paying attention to you now!
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:31, archived)
No.
No i don't think so.
(I helped save b3ta! well, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:20, archived)
Most tech breaks when I touch it
Thankfully I married a techie geek.
(I helped save b3ta! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:21, archived)
Does he break when you touch him?

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
pfft
he's been known to go weak at the knees with the right kind of touch.
(I helped save b3ta! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
punch in the balls?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
You know me too well

(I helped save b3ta! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
See what I mean? ;)

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
Well there was that Intel floating point bug, back in the day,
that was quite embarrassing for them at the time. That didn't really affect me though.
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:21, archived)
I don't understand the question.
Computers only fail when people have failed all over them in the first place.
(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:21, archived)
Spag bol and broccoli.
Oh sorry, wrong question.
(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
Did you get any on you?

(I helped save b3ta! well, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
DULL YAWN BORING

(I helped save b3ta! Bou : nobody ever says anything about dirty old women, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
FAT MENTAL LIAR.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:26, archived)
Don't talk to me about Mario Kart.







FUCKING BLUE SHELLS.
(I helped save b3ta! elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)

xkcd.com/290/
(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
haha, segfaults

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:24, archived)
Truer words were never spoken.

(I helped save b3ta! elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:24, archived)
Nope
No idea what that was meant to mean
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
having just watched eagle vs shark i find myself unaccountably attracted to the girl in it
carry on
(hot white cum, YEAH! i will show you 0wnage in a handful of posts, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:22, archived)
dude/dudette
what's the whole thing about me supposedly bringing a folder of FPS to a bash?

I generally answer all enquiries truthfully, I just wondered why you had to know...?
(I helped save b3ta! Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:25, archived)
i got told that by someone on here and i found it hideously pathetic

(hot white cum, YEAH! i will show you 0wnage in a handful of posts, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:26, archived)
it was my first bash
I thought evberyone on b3ta (back when there was only /board) were all professional graphic artists (the technical standard of posts was pretty high back then) and I was a pretend amateur, so I'd have to prove I wasn't just a lurker.

So now we've established that, you have your answer. And we can all get along in peace and harmony and I won't have to worry about you being an angry angry person.
(I helped save b3ta! Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:32, archived)
Everybody is advised to worry about boondocks.
That's why he has an exclamation in his name.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:34, archived)
*whistles*
*walks away*
(I helped save b3ta! Derek Monte subthread killer: qu'est-ce que c'est, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
I don't understand the first bit.
This is computers failing me.
(I helped save b3ta! LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
I sometimes play Mario Kart on the DS
I put lots of bugs into my software, not always intentionally.
(I helped save b3ta! minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:23, archived)
then stop looking for porn

(I helped save b3ta! Derek Monte subthread killer: qu'est-ce que c'est, Tue 26 Aug 2008, 20:27, archived)