I've just bought my son a happy meal because I am a fucking prick.
What about you?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:03, archived)

I'm hoovering.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:04, archived)

o
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:05, archived)

Fucking levitating cunt.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:05, archived)

Pfft

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:08, archived)

OH FUCKING HELL.
I'm addicted to Mafia Wars on facebook. FUCK. I'M SHIT.
It's so fucking pointless. It's just swapping numbers for numbers. Fucking hell. I fucking hate people like me.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:12, archived)

Procrastiplication
As proud as I should be for coining a new phrase, I'm going to admit that it's not as snazzy as I'd like, and doesn't have the easy wit to it that antidextrous does.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:23, archived)

Procraplication

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:55, archived)

you only hate it cos we are in the same mafia
you got a nice gun out of it!
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:29, archived)

I'm supposed to be packing
and sorting stuff to dump

I'm browsing the web instead.
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:06, archived)

Hello, haven't seen you in a while.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:08, archived)

Hiya
I'm in the process of moving house. Don't have the internet in the new house yet. So only come online when I'm back here sorting my stuff out for moving.

Have I missed anything?
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:10, archived)

No.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)

shame
:(
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:16, archived)

I think someone said something funny yesterday but I might be thinking of another site.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:15, archived)

perhaps it was baldmonkey

( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:17, archived)

I doubt it.
he's an unfunny cunt.
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:14, archived)

I bought him one because he wouldn't get in my car.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)

im reporting you to the orthorities

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:13, archived)

lol
www.b3ta.com/talk/6240951
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:14, archived)

There was a sign in the pub garden I went to on Wednesday that said "playful children need watchful parents"
My suggestion to change it to "sexy children" didn't go down very well with my work colleagues.
( magnum, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:54, archived)

^^^
Understandable really
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:59, archived)

I've just finished writing a football article
Now I'm thinking about what egg based meal to have
( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:18, archived)

Eggs!

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:19, archived)

Eggy Cup
or french toast
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:19, archived)

Two EXCELLENT suggestions!

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:30, archived)

¦:¬(

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:31, archived)

What noooow...

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:36, archived)

I've just bought my girls, clothes
BECAUSE THEY WON'T STOP FUCKING GROWING!
( jenpots, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:38, archived)

Duct tape over their heads and around the soles of their feet.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:39, archived)

there are ways and means
but it does have the down side of the daily mail launching a hate campaign against you a few months later
( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:40, archived)

Eldest girl child isn't quite 9 yet
and she's in 11-12 year old clothes. And it's fucking terrible trying to find little girl clothes for little girls. It's all fucking crop tops, short shorts, mini skirts and fucking boob tubes! I'm not fucking pimping my daughter!

/mother rant
( jenpots, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:43, archived)

^^^^ This
My daughter is 14, Mixed marriage, 1/2 Thai, the clothes she want's to wear make me angry as when we are out together I get accused of pedo shit. Grrrr
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:49, archived)

Yep
When I catch older boys looking at her, I give them the evil eye and mention loudly about her age.

When she does have boyfriends it really isn't her father they will need to watch out for.
( jenpots, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:53, archived)

Jen (My daughters name as well)
The guys she has introduced to me and those that have seen me are shit scared of me...(Except for one who has declared himself gay at the age of 14 as he thought that would save him from the manly glare of - "If you go near her I'll fucking kill you" look I give all suitors)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:56, archived)

At least they don't call you a rapist though.
You terrible rapist.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:11, archived)

what is a terrible rapist?
one that consistently fails to get their end away, or one that gives you their number after?
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:16, archived)

I really have never understoon why they owuld make those sort of clothes for such young girls in the firstplace.
It's quite sick that someone would think up such designs in the first place.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:54, archived)

I blame Bratz

( minimum fuss - an all time favourite, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:59, archived)

It's because of role models innit.
If they see someone they like dressing like that, they'll then want to dress the same.
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:26, archived)

sad thing is innocence it taken far too early
well, if I have anything to do with it it does.
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)

wot!
no pimp my ride?
( Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:35, archived)

make them take up smoking.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)

you should be fucking well locked up you cunt

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:56, archived)

So should I!
Not telling what I did tonight!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 14:58, archived)

I'm just going to assume you raped someone and call you a rapist whenever you post on here.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:02, archived)

Mike you are extemely perceptive
But, unfortunately wrong (on this occasion)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:04, archived)

you would say that, you fucking RAPIST

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:06, archived)

I am having a full on genuine *LOL* at this
It was pretty tame really. I refused sex from a hooker
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:10, archived)

so you refused to pay a hooker then raped her?

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:10, archived)

This is horrible news.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:12, archived)

Something along these lines
Without the "refuse" and "rape"

Edit: Unfortunately there are quite a number of Hookers here, makes me a bit sad really as the majority of them are beautiful women who deserve better than the trap they have been caught within!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:14, archived)

You paid a hooker then *blanked* her?
Can't see any word other than rape filling that blank.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)

See edit above
And I did laugh
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:20, archived)

so she jumped you and took your wallet anyway?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)

I have a wife that takes care of the wallet
Pity about the jump part!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:22, archived)

wait, you raped a police officer?
this just keeps getting worse
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:30, archived)

I heard it was rape, I don't know where I heard that rumour from though

( Imhotep is Invisible - Consider this a divorce, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:04, archived)

Rapist.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:04, archived)

Serial prefx requires to be added

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:06, archived)

You're such a disgusting rapist.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:09, archived)

I have been watching discovery shed
which inspired a pointless ebay session looking for power tools that i will never use but feel i need.
( chuff monkey I AM him, Sat 20 Jun 2009, 15:18, archived)