Good Afternoonget to live for five extra years but as a trifle, or turn into a woodpecker right now for the next five years then the extra five years you don't have to be a trifle you can just be you
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 12:53,
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I fucking hate trifle (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 12:59,
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The vast majority of trifles involve custard Which is pus from the festering anal boils of Satan himself.
Also, there's often bananas involved.
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Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 15:56,
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I'm just staring at this in complete disbelief and sadness because1.) custard?!?!
2.) bananas should be nowhere NEAR trifle imo. You want a sharper fruit to cut through the sweetness of everything else. Bananas are borderline repellantly sweet in themselves. I wouldn't put bananas in a trifle even if I had nobody coming to tea but monkeys
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:23,
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there is a good slater recipe for a trifle with blackcurrants, it's here fyi, scroll past the bream and all that nonsense, it's under the rather unfortunate title of "nigel's delightful trifle" but don't let that put you off. and ffs don't put crystallised violets on it obviously unless you like to spend your weekends dressed as joan hickson
www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2004/aug/08/foodanddrink.features
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:29,
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Mum always puts banana in trifle Slices of Swiss roll on the bottom, then jelly, then banana, with whipped cream and a crumbled up cadbury's flake on top.
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Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:35,
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bless your Mum obviously but this sounds...kinda a really clear explanation of why you Don't Like Trifle
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:42,
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Funny enough, the whole family loves her trifle (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:52,
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Hello-hooray what a nice day, for eating trifles, eating trifles.(
Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 14:31,
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The trouble with trifles.(
Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 14:32,
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This sounds like a trick, if I turn into a woodpecker then you're just going to say "you can get an extra five years just being you, and you're a woodpecker"so I'm going to be a woodpecker for the rest of my life, am I not? Curse your trickery.
(, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:10, Reply)
I promise I would never, ever try to trick you into being trapped as a woodpecker for the rest of your lifeI'd never do that
you can trust me
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:11,
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That's exactly what someone who was going to turn me into a woodpecker for the rest of my life would say(, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:34, Reply)
sorry what's that could you say it all again because all I could hear wasd-ddd-ddd-ddddddddddddd-tok-tok-tok-tok-TOKTOKTOKTOKTOK-Dddddddddrrrrrrrrrrrr
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:41,
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It started last weekb3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/post2638744
(, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:47, Reply)
does the trifle have some magic where it doesn't go off?can't see the point of being non-sapient mouldy trifle for 5 years
also do woodpeckers have predators? Neither option seems worth it for only 5 years.
Come back to me of you think of some better deals
(, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:14, Reply)
to be honest I just didn't think it was good enogh to just say Good Afternoon, I don't think these are great choices either really :((
vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 13:21,
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believe in yourself vladyou don't need conversational gambits and trickery to add value to an interaction. You are enough as yourself x
(, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 14:11, Reply)
:( I wish this was truebut I can absolutely assure you it's not
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:31,
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what if I want to live as a trifle(
theniwokeup has been awake since, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 14:22,
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You can get Richard Herring's book of emergency questions for under £3 on ebay.(
brb top shit, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 15:01,
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brb that's not going to help you out here now is itif richard is selling a book of emergency ANSWERS for under three pounds then you might find that useful here but not questions
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 16:34,
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What physically happens to my human brain in each scenario?I fear that there won't be much of 'me' left to fit into the skull of a woodpecker, and after 5 years there'd be even less of 'me' left to transfer back.
The trifle scenario seems worse.
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brb top shit, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 18:44,
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in each scenario you get to keep your human brain and all of your intellectual capacity whilst also gaining insight into the intellectual, emotional and somatic experience of the woodpecker and the trifle. I have aimed to make the experience as horrific as possible
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vladimir, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 19:30,
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I see Graeme Dott is a nonce.Who had him in the 'snooker paedo' sweepstake?
(, Wed 9 Apr 2025, 15:57, Reply)
