Hi there spunk-bubble's
Having a nice day? I've done eff all so far
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 13:36, archived)

That's not true, you've done an effective threadstomp.
My day is nice, yes. Like me.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 13:51, archived)

A lot of poos, mostly
I’m very productive
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 13:54, archived)

A lot of poos, mostly
I'm full of shit
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 13:57, archived)

A lot of Poohs, mostly
I'm Christopher Robin
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 14:03, archived)

A lot of booze, mostly
I'm very drunk
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 14:11, archived)

brilliant

( MiseryCunt find me on eggs, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 14:26, archived)

i ate some crackers

( MiseryCunt find me on eggs, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 14:25, archived)

idgi

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:05, archived)

A lot of coos, mostly
I’m a dove
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 14:26, archived)

Took kid one to an Easter trail thing, then he spent over an hour running around the play area.
Fucking knackered now.
(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 14:29, archived)

I hope he burned your neck

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:54, archived)

A lot of ooze, mostly.
I've developed my own envelope of protective slime.
( .Yeti., Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:08, archived)

^ living the bream

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:23, archived)

OH BREAM IN CREAM YEAH BREAM IN CREAM

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 17:12, archived)

I just had bream for dinner.
It wasn't in cream, though.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 1 Apr 2026, 18:33, archived)

I've developed my own envelope of protective slime. Turtle power!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:28, archived)

Well you know what the say - ooze it or lose it, baby!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:57, archived)

Slime too sexy
Ooze that girl
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 16:03, archived)

I'm enjoying a really big cup of tea
and I've had two chocolate digestive biscuits with my cuppa. Plain chocolate because I'm middle-class.

I also saw a black curly wig in the hedge earlier. Either that or a dwarf was stuck and too scared to say anything as I stood there laughing.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:08, archived)

hedgewig and the angry inch

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:25, archived)

Haaaaaa!!!!

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:47, archived)

Toupee, or not toupee?

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:33, archived)

A lot of woos, mostly
Some yays, some hoopla
( broadsword, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 15:36, archived)

Don’t Toss the Liquid in Canned Beans — Here Are 6 Ways Chefs Use It
Mayonnaise and aioli
Thickening sauces and soups
Cocktail foam
Hummus and other dips
Meringues and cakes
Rice

There.
( $$ ✅, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 16:44, archived)

Also enhances oral, vaginal or anal sex.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 1 Apr 2026, 16:57, archived)

Aquafaba is genuinely useful m8
Especially if ur a vegan
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 17:16, archived)

Damnit too late

( broadsword, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 17:20, archived)

Why would you put it in hummus, that's a rhetorical question, you wouldn't put it in hummus

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 19:07, archived)

-tail

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 1 Apr 2026, 19:08, archived)