Congratulations
www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/whats-on/whats-on-news/chester-zoos-special-arrival-welcomes-33967513
( mongychops, Wed 20 May 2026, 7:54, archived)

Thanks, it wasn’t easy sneaking into the zoo and fucking that female aardvark without getting caught.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 May 2026, 8:19, archived)

aww, the clacker-clacker of massive claws.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 20 May 2026, 8:42, archived)

-claws +cloaca

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 20 May 2026, 11:46, archived)

“With the calf’s giant ears, long snout and playful personality, we think it’s the perfect fit for a proper good shagging”
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 May 2026, 9:26, archived)

That's almost my dating profile word-for-word, except for the bit about being a calf.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 May 2026, 10:34, archived)

...because that would be weird

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 20 May 2026, 11:27, archived)

Exactly, you get me.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 May 2026, 12:50, archived)

OH MY GOOD GOD THE EARRRRS

( vladimir The Days Pass Quickly Immersed in the Shadow of Et, Wed 20 May 2026, 14:13, archived)