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# Sick Boy's Weekly Rant.....and it's only Monday....


J.D. Weatherspoon (purveyors of continental beer brewed in or near Swindon) have just announced that they are to erect signs in their hostelries instructing their clientele not to use mobile phones or swear whilst on the premises. Now, I am not normally a man that rises to corporate goading but this, sir, is a step to far. At which point do we rise up and protest against these infringements of our civil liberties? They are being eroded one by one by faceless do-gooders who believe that a nanny-state is the only way to stop us from hurting ourselves. Gone is my right to partake of a cheeky cigarette in these bars and now my other vice (swearing) is under threat. Hailing from Scotland, most of my extra-curricular activities involve drinking, smoking and/or swearing (these are compulsory modules in our education system – the Scottish parliament has asked for these to become exhibition events at the next Olympics so that we have a podium chance). Removing my right to do them together in a pub as god intended is nothing short of insanity. I implore you, my fellow b3tans, to join me in sparking up a Capstan Full Strength, donning your hands-free kits and shouting ‘cock!’ at the people who are shackling the actions of free-thinking citizens in this country. I thank you for your patience and allowing me to blow the cobwebs from my spleen. /RANT

Oh, and my friendly neighbourhood Post Office clerk insisted that postage to Aberdeen was European and not UK domestic…….again.
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:01, archived)
# It is a crap pub chain
Full of fuckwits anyway
(Alienboy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:02, archived)
# i like the cambridge wetherspoons -
its big but usually quiet enough to have a nice chat.

plus on saturday nights its full of 18 year olds in skirts barely short enough to cover their panties...

(also quite a fan of the moon under water in Leicester Square, but got in a huge fight in the one on Watford, so not keen ;)
(I helped save b3ta! djdirect, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:05, archived)
# Wet Her Spoons
heheheheheehhehe
(I helped save b3ta! thebear is thebear, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:12, archived)
# Do they still do the
Curry and Comedy night? Or was that somewhere else entirely?
(I helped save b3ta! Fronds are waving gently on, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:12, archived)
# the one in Leicester Square
is awful! Rammed full, and 95% of them are Ameican tourists.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:16, archived)
# the 'Spoons
in my town has pictures of old local inns and pubs all over it, just the sort of place that chain pubs are helping to destroy.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:08, archived)
# like a museum to a lost way of life...
..reminiscent of the Jewish quarter in prague and just as sinister.
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:11, archived)
# They're shitholes,
spend you're money elsewhere! The extra you spend on drinks is worth it.
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:03, archived)
# pubs and swearing belong together.
Fortunately, not all pubs are owned by JD Wethersporks. Bunch of arseholes.

(Scotland here too)
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:03, archived)
# I am in exile in London...
..until I return and claim my throne
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:07, archived)
# I stay at
home most of the time - as soon as I leave the house it's don't do this, don't do that so sod it - I stay in.
(I helped save b3ta! helmetcream, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:04, archived)
# You could always not go
to any of JD Wetherspoons' hideous pubs and frequent the many establishments that still allow their clientele to enjoy themselves on the premises.
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:04, archived)
# I thought of this.....
...but it is the start of the rot. Soon we will not be allowed to be drunk/leary anywhere.
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:05, archived)
# i think banning phones in pubs is a great idea
but no swearing? bollocks to that!

they should ban all children too.
(I helped save b3ta! Reverend Dan, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:06, archived)
# they should ban banning stuff.
.
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:07, archived)
# From
the whole world.
(I helped save b3ta! helmetcream, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:07, archived)
# I agree with the phones.....
but not the fucking swearing! They just happened to announce the two together to gain support from the ant-phone, pro-swearing lobby.
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:09, archived)
# and that's a big lobby.
.
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:13, archived)
# What you said.
But aren't they just going to alienate 99.9% of their clientele? It's corporate suicide!
(I helped save b3ta! Baz Fuck off, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:16, archived)
# You've
got more chance of shitting in the Queens handbag.
(I helped save b3ta! Samsonite, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:06, archived)
# they're just softening you up for the banning of alcohol.
anyway, enjoy the rules. go into a jd wetherspoon's, and start reporting anyone on a phone, or who is smoking, or swears. inform the barstaff and tell them that if they don't remove the culprits you'll have no option but to call head office (number should be obtainable from their website) and tell them that their rules are being unacceptably broken.

you could probably clear the pub in three hours.
(martian, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:07, archived)
# that is the wisest way forward
use their own stupid rules against them
(I helped save b3ta! Pootle, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:17, archived)
# good I'm glad
mobile phones are the worse thing ever invented
*FACT*
(I helped save b3ta! mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:07, archived)
# Actually
Banana skin shoes are the worst thing ever invented.
*FACT*
(I helped save b3ta! Samsonite, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:10, archived)
#
Banana skin shoes are the worst thing ever invented.
*FICTION* ;)
(I helped save b3ta! mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:10, archived)
# nah
unsliceable bread
(yorkpete, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:12, archived)
# I was going to get
rid of my mobile but then I'd only be contactable by e-mail and would miss a lot of booze ups.
(I helped save b3ta! helmetcream, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:10, archived)
# mine
was very handy after the bus/car interface I was involved in though!
(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:11, archived)
# I completely agree
It costs me £60 a month to have one, it's annoying, and very unsocial when you or your mates start phoning or texting in their/your presence.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:17, archived)
#
Really ?
/Starts texting mate to tell them what Dr Drink just said.
(I helped save b3ta! Samsonite, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:20, archived)
# I got kicked out of a Wetherspoons
a couple of years back for saying "fuck" very loudly....apparently.

I blame them, they sold me loads of beer and vodka.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:14, archived)
# I wasn't let in last year for being under age


I was 27 at the time :(
(I helped save b3ta! mookid, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:29, archived)
# apparantly theyre banning other stuff too
like drinking, breathing and people. 'cos they get on old people's heaving breasts
(I helped save b3ta! GTA, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:18, archived)
# They serve shit
cider as well: Dry Blackthorn. Yeugh! I'll have a Scrumpy Jack please.
(I helped save b3ta! <>Dog www.stevelaker.blog, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:19, archived)
# some pitcher an piano's have banned dancing or rythmic movement.
I facy getting a big gang together, all going down their, moving rythmically, and when we get told not to, say "this is the AGM of the London Parkinsons support group."

Even if we dont get free beer, its got to be worth it to see the look on some poor bar managers face.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:22, archived)
# Hahahahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Mon 2 Jun 2003, 14:24, archived)