![Challenge Entry: The Inanimate Sex Challenge [challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif)

From the The Inanimate Sex Challenge challenge. See all 234 entries (closed)
( , Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:35, archived)

That reminds me: there was a news story a few months ago, last summer kind of time, about a crazy woman who force-fed her baby daughter a ridiculous amount of salt in order to deliberately fuck her up. She got caught and arrested and was taken to court, and - this is absolutely true - she was charged with assault. ASSAULT. Just assault. Not GBH, not neglect, not any of the other names they have for harming people. ASSAULT. Genius.
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:40,
archived)

There was a picture in the paper of a gas man checking a boiler for leaks using...a lighter!
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:46,
archived)

Which, unfortunately, makes it less funny than the assault girl.
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:48,
archived)

know people who do that. Pity they're still alive I s'pose! Chasing a leak with a lighter? Eh?
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:51,
archived)

I am opposed to battery farming, so battery fucking is completely wrong.
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:39,
archived)

and also using Firebird.
My word, it's rather spiffing, isn't it?
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:42,
archived)
My word, it's rather spiffing, isn't it?

now that i've sorted out my problems with the aid of Witchy...he's a very very very nice man
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:45,
archived)

All are well. Probably.
I have no authority on the matter; for all I know everybody else on the board has some obscure tropical cancer that I can't even spell. That's unlikely though. There's very little that I can't spell.
"Conflagration", for instance. I can spell that.
Or "posthumous".
Or "emfizeema"... okay, maybe I can't spell that. Unless I spelled it right, in which case I can spell it and I knew that.
( ,
Fri 23 Jan 2004, 23:46,
archived)
I have no authority on the matter; for all I know everybody else on the board has some obscure tropical cancer that I can't even spell. That's unlikely though. There's very little that I can't spell.
"Conflagration", for instance. I can spell that.
Or "posthumous".
Or "emfizeema"... okay, maybe I can't spell that. Unless I spelled it right, in which case I can spell it and I knew that.