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# don't blame you
it wasn't very good
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:30, archived)
# I knew it.
That's why Gigli was crap as well (apart from it having that fat* arsed cunt in it) - shit name.





*I'm aware I have a fat arse. But at least I'm not a cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:31, archived)
# gigli has got ben affleck in it, hasn't it?
i can't fucking stand him
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:35, archived)
# Yes, but he can live as Chasing Amy was actually an alright movie.
If you ask me, anyway, but I love Joey Lauren Adams and Jason Lee so much more.

He's the lesser of two big stupid evils.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:36, archived)
# joey lauren adams:
squeaky-voiced irritating fuck

worse than the bird in tankgirl
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:39, archived)
# You know when old men get all crotchetty and a bit annoyed with everything?
Are you going to buy a gun at that point?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:40, archived)
# nope
i'm going to switch of the tv and the internet,and read books whilst listening to CDs for the rest of my life to prevent having a spontaneous aneurism
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:42, archived)
# Yes but your wee ones will be grown up
and most probably want things

And they might have wee ones, and they'll definitely want things.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:43, archived)
# But that can work
When you are old you say things like "Spiderman the MOVIE!?" and "I remember 'The Third Man' - now THAT was a movie".

And then the kids groan and roll their eyes.
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:48, archived)
# I'm just going to urinate in public till they leave me alone.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:49, archived)
# The only reason i even acknowledge the existance of the USA
is "My Name Is Earl".
(coobeastie Used to Be in Evil Gazebo, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:39, archived)
# the first Mrs Afinkawan
Didn't really believe in the existence of America either. She thought it was a marketing ploy.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:40, archived)
# it is merely a colony of ours
let them believe that thay have their own country if it keeps them happy.

just call it "Americashire" when they aren't around.
(coobeastie Used to Be in Evil Gazebo, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:44, archived)
# Hahaha
We did that to a mate's unnecessarily stereotypical yank cousin when he visited some years back.

When he was mid froth about us calling America a colony we said, "Calm down mate, no offence intended...so what is it...south canada or something?"
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:47, archived)
# good old US of A
let them think they have their own country, and it only takes them 85 years to start a war with themselves.
(coobeastie Used to Be in Evil Gazebo, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:53, archived)
# Jason Lee is the man.
Well, one of many men. You know.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:41, archived)
# i saw him skate boarding in an old music video the other day
can't remember what band it was though
(I helped save b3ta! Aphex The Mink Snackless, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:43, archived)
# Jason Lee and the Stan Lee Cameos!
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:44, archived)
# Shame he's a Cruise Clone really
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:48, archived)
# Excuse me?
As in Tom?

Are your eyes on backwards?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# scientologist
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# he used to be a proskateboarder
he is also a commited christian
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:47, archived)
# He is
a Scientologist.

Or at least, he was - maybe he isn't any more.

[EDIT] Nope, it would appear he still is.
(I helped save b3ta! Mystery_Bob, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:52, archived)
# From what I hear
Scientology isn't an easy religion to quit, especially if you want to maintain a public profile.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:58, archived)
# Some folks have done it
I believe Jerry Seinfeld flirted with it, but no longer is involved, for example.
(I helped save b3ta! Mystery_Bob, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 14:03, archived)
# Jerry Seinfeld is bigger than any religion.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 14:04, archived)
# 100%
by Sonic youth
(I helped save b3ta! Mystery_Bob, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# Fucking redemption-comedy.
Why can't they just hit each other with cars? it would be much funner.

They could call it My Name Is EAAAAARGH I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:46, archived)
# Gronky telly.
Sounds fab.

Strictly Come Dancing WITH AN EXPLODABLE JIHAD COW
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:47, archived)
# Strictly
Quadrapeadic Come Dancing
(I helped save b3ta! Steerable_forehead Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration,don't fail me now, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# Have I got news for you? YOUR PARENTS JUST DIED!
EVERYBODY POINT AND LAUGH, YOU'RE ON LIVE TELEVISION!

Here's your prize of ten thousand bottles of scotch.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# And
your Cafepress store, of course.
(I helped save b3ta! Mystery_Bob, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:51, archived)
# shh!
anyway, thats in "Americashire".
(coobeastie Used to Be in Evil Gazebo, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:56, archived)
# 'existential comedy'
should be warning enough
(I helped save b3ta! Debbilgrrrrl is kinda back, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:32, archived)
# Not necessarily
Being John Malkovich was ace.

Huckabees just wanted to be as good but it wasn't.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:33, archived)
# True dat
it was fab

and I'm all for a bit of existentialism

but as a general rule when applied to films the word tends to translate as 'up its own arse' I find
(I helped save b3ta! Debbilgrrrrl is kinda back, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:35, archived)
# MALKOVICH
I love that film so much- it gave me lasting respect for Cameron Diaz.

And then she went and offended the.......Koreans? Taiwanese? One of them lot.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:35, archived)
# WHAT?!
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:37, archived)
# You're suprised.
I do something/say something stupid and you're suprised.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:38, archived)
# 'And then she went and offended the.......Koreans? Taiwanese? One of them lot.'
?????
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:39, archived)
# She wore a bag with a maoist slogan on
And upset the.....the....not chinese.

Hang on.

EDIT- Peru.

why do they care, exactly?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:41, archived)
# i used to have a watch with mao on it
no peruvians ever complained as far as i know
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:44, archived)
# See, they're just picking on her.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:44, archived)
# China and Peru
being such close neighbours have a long and bloody history.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:44, archived)
# They're not close neighbours!
Hang on.



Isn't Peru in South America?


I feel so stupid right now.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:45, archived)
# Nepal?
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:47, archived)
# Antarctica?
The Moon?

Rigel-7?
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# That's near India. (I think. Who knows? fucking hell.)
Oh my god, I'm going to a cigarette before my brain falls out.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# you'd have thought so
but Peru had a problem with Maoist inspired terrorists committing genocide. You can see why they might be a bit tetchy.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:50, archived)
# Peruvians
I think it was
had something to do with the Shining Path terrorists

and Malkovich is an ace film, indeed
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:39, archived)
# Who, what, eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:44, archived)
# You can tell who's who by
the shape of thier hats yo know
(I helped save b3ta! Steerable_forehead Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration,don't fail me now, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:49, archived)
# She insulted the Peruvians
by carrying a bag around Machu Picchu, depicting Mao, or some other communist leader, who reminded the Peruvians of the Shininh Path, who abducted and murdered thousands of people in the country.
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 14:00, archived)
# I thought Being John Malkovich
was appalling. Huckabees was bad, but not as pretentious (though that's not really saying much!)
(I helped save b3ta! Hamster Trippin' aka Mr. Titts, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:36, archived)
# Yeah
It was nowhere near as good as I'd been led to believe.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:33, archived)
# I stand by my long held opinion that all movies are shit.
ALL OF THEM.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:35, archived)
# there was a girl on my media studies course who hated movies
which really confused the fuck out of me
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:37, archived)
# It's quite simple:
Sitting in silence for an hour and a half does not qualify as a social event.

Going to the movies on your own makes you a loser.

You're not "sharing an experience", you're "killing time because you're a boring fuck that can't use your own imagination".

Conversations always win, hands down. If you can't have an interesting one, it's time to take a look in the mirror.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:41, archived)
# so the fact that they are by turns funny/ upsetting/ scary/ enthralling/thought-provoking/enjoyable
means nothing?
does the same apply to books?
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:54, archived)
# Books are personal.
Movies are apparently meant to be watched in groups.

Also, they all go on too long. Movies should be over in five minutes.

It could just be someone shouting "Ok so this protagonist just got pulled out of their comfort zone, now they're moving on to achieve glory".

For the sake of variety they could use a different person to shout it each time.

This would be much better.
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 14:03, archived)
# Fuck off.
What about that Annabel Cheung story?

Or whatever her name was.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:37, archived)
# that was just depressing
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:38, archived)
# That'll teach me to watch it on mute.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:39, archived)
# The only good movie ever made is
One of our dinosaurs is missing.

153% of the FACT.
(I helped save b3ta! Hamster Trippin' aka Mr. Titts, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:38, archived)
# NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo
baddest movie EVER.

Even if it does have sexy Jeff in it.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:39, archived)
# ustinov was a whore for disney dollars
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:40, archived)
# You've never seen
Gay Purr-ee then
(I helped save b3ta! Steerable_forehead Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration,don't fail me now, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:40, archived)
# *too busy watching films to argue*
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Mon 9 Jul 2007, 13:42, archived)