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# Why I hate the rise of Magners....


True story.

Fucking Magners.

Edit: Just seen the Magners post below. What timing!
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:12, archived)
# There, there grandad
there grandadnot so loud you're scaring the children . . .

I feel your pain matey!


(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:14, archived)
# Now I understand
why the missus used to get so wound up about people trying to put ice in her scotch.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:16, archived)
# It's the fault of cheapo pub owners
not contect with charging a 400% mark up on supermarket prices (which aren't exactly cost) they have to employ minimum wage twelve year olds that have a clue about exactly feck all except 'LOL!' and 'ROFL!' and 'What-EV-ARR!'


(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:19, archived)
# Yeah
the amount of times I asked for a neat whisky and got asked if I wanted ice in it...
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:21, archived)
# plus ice = less cider, even higher profits
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:21, archived)
# ^This
I was too stunned to do anything except give an evil stare and say 'no'.

What I almost said was, "No, I asked for a pint."
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:24, archived)
# LOL
I think you're right there... I saw a documentary on D'Aggio who own pretty much all popular alcohol (Smirnoff, Guinness, Magners erm... and others) and apparently the whole ice in magners thing comes from them, in an effort to make cider cool and drinkable for girls and kids. Guinness Extra Cold works on a similar premise, they seem to think that people didn't drink guinness or magners previously, because they had "old man stigma". Yuck.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:25, archived)
# DAMN THEM!!
DAMN THEM ALL TO HELL!!
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:14, archived)
# Yes!
Invent a new circle for them, I say.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:16, archived)
# the circle of fire.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:17, archived)
# The Rise of Magners...
sounds like a new Star Wars film...
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:14, archived)
# Sounds like a shit film
which also makes it sound like a new Star Wars film.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:15, archived)
# THE RISE OF MAGNETS
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:15, archived)
# ONE FLEW OVER THE MAGNET'S NEST!
and dropped cocking ice in it!


(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:16, archived)
# MAGNET PI
(surPrise Ice!)
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:21, archived)
# haha this happened to me also
I was back in the uk recently and ordered magners for a mate. I had to get the lady to repeat herself twice. I was most confused at what she was offering me.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:15, archived)
# Yeah
I think I stood there stunned for half a second. Probably gave her a really filthy look too.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:15, archived)
# btw, is there any sort of hookey non-bbc link on which to hear you comedies?
I tried to tune in on the thursday in question but no matter where I turned, I got an annoying lady-voice telling me that this stream was not available outside of the uk.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:19, archived)
# Not that I know of.
I have them all on CD though.

I did find one site which had posted one of my sketches(!).

www.articlesandtexticles.co.uk/imgs/0710/first_life.mp3
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:23, archived)
# wahey cheers
I shall have a listen when I get home.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:35, archived)
# bloody cider drinkers!
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:15, archived)
# ning
I have already commenced shitting myself about saturday after reading that Mr SFA has booked our team hotel for the Euros. Wanker.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:16, archived)
# urgh don't talk to me about nerves :o/

/poopin' ma pants blog

should be a good day though ;D
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:18, archived)
# Silly Afinkawan!
Magners is not ciders!

If it ain't at least 7% with potential to contain dissolved rat, it ain't real.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:15, archived)
# I know!
One place I used to drink had that pretty nice Westons organic cider until they had a row with their supplier. I went in the next time and the barmaid said to me, "Sorry, we haven't got any cider tonight. We have got Magners though."
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:18, archived)
# I was in Carnwall drinking Rattler a year ago.
4 pints and I was partying. Chatting to the landlord he goes "'Course, 'er ain't what 'er used to be since all these EU regulations, mind"

"Well what is it?"

"'S only 'bout 7 'r 8 these days."

"(splutter)... ok... what was it before?"

"Oh if you got a good barrel 'er could be around 12 'r 13..."
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:22, archived)
# ^This
I found a pub in Bristol while I was at uni. Unmarked pump at the end of the bar, only obvious regulars getting served from it in their own tankards.

Finally managed to get hold of a pint and it was fab.

I went to get up to get another and realised that the bottom half of my legs were already completely pissed.

Three more pints later and I was made an honorary local.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:27, archived)
# Rattler is..
a wonderful cider. A mate works in the brewery where its made and if a batch is too strong he gets to bring a polypin home before they dilute it. Extra strong Rattler. Mmm heaven!
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:43, archived)
# ^This^
as a long time Weston's fan (that's not Simon Weston BTW) I despise the ice fad.

One spotty oik in an off-licence told me on Sunday that the wine I was buying was "nice in a pint glass with ice". I almost wanted to put it back on the shelf...
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:16, archived)
# You definitely should have smashed the bottle across his face.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:17, archived)
# Then opened his jugular with the broken bottle.
Justifiable homicide I believe.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:18, archived)
# bloody cider drinkers
also - I once had to glass a very pretty bar maid in the face because she gave me extra cold guinness.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:17, archived)
# It's a con... Even as a regular guiness drinker
I am still unable to tell the difference between extra cold and normal...
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:19, archived)
# it's new
and, hence, bad.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:25, archived)
# It's so it pours quicker.
Not the taste.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:26, archived)
# You should stop drinking that rusty poo water
and drink a pint with some actual alcohol in it.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:20, archived)
# C]:0O


(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:22, archived)
# I prefer my large volume drinks heavier than they are fizzy
I take my alcohol as neat whisky, sometimes with a whiskey chaser.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:23, archived)
# *slaps*
remove that 'e'


(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:25, archived)
# there is in Irish whiskey though
which is also equally nice.
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:26, archived)
# Dang!


(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:35, archived)
# Old Rosie!
That stuff is *WIN*.

The lightly sparkling version in bottles from Morrisons is pretty cool too..

Addlestons is the other lethal one i remember..



Anyone ever bought the giant box thingy (20L) from westons?
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:25, archived)
# Gah - tell me about it!
I was asked if I wanted a slice of lemon in my Blackthorn the other week
(, Tue 13 Nov 2007, 14:39, archived)