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# The Pope
blesses a bottle of gin. the Holy Gin is sprinkled over the corpse. Slowly, coughing, the creature rises and begins to shuffle towards the nearest fag shop
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:44, archived)
# chocolate chips????


Click
(james, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:38, archived)
# important research tool
(incorporating neat bargraph drawing code I wrote for work last year which I'm quite proud of)

Presenting:
Which is better?
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:34, archived)
# Thats
great!

How about 3, 4 or 5 word versions? :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:38, archived)
# I'd have to redesign
the database a bit, but perfectly possible...

maybe tonight when I've finished the work I'm supposed to be doing.
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:41, archived)
# YES!!
Crabs beat Vishnu! Eat that Death, Destroyer of Worlds Hindu deity.
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:47, archived)
# eating worms
beats staring in a bukkake video hands down, 100 - 0.

sex with crab bloke was a close second to having your anus ripped out by wild dogs though (crabbloke sex - 49 Vs. wild dogs/anus combo - 51)
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:43, archived)
# Also
Dogs are better than cats, and north is better than south - In your face shandy-drinking cat fanciers!
(TommyTheMuff is a new dad and luvvin it, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:04, archived)
# The web needs saving fast. It said:
WORK! It's 26% play and 74% work. So the internet says WORK is better.

Use this information wisely.

Again! Again!
(james, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:45, archived)
# its been confirmed
bear 86% - penguin 14%
the odds are stacked against them......
(nic*, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:59, archived)
# Yay
Surprisingly, Linux beats Windows - Eat that Billy-boy Gates!
(I helped save b3ta! man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:59, archived)
# I think
that says a lot about the psyche of B3tans...
(I helped save b3ta! man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:06, archived)
# Hoorah!
My old desktop is now the very very worst!!! Beat that!! (easily)
clicky?
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:32, archived)
# Did this come from here?
http://www.solfire.com/flash/barn.swf
(russellsprout, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:20, archived)
# no.
but it should have.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:26, archived)
# I dunno
but its fecking brilliant :))

One of the best flash anims i've seen in a while for sure...
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:31, archived)
[challenge entry] Yahpoooooooooooooo!
yahpoo is shite! - Literally!!
(I helped save b3ta! andy206, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:11, archived)
# well fook me with a stick
me desktop is number 2 on show us yer desktop..
here

So I want to say thanx to the guy who made the image of the kitten :)
(I helped save b3ta! Hugo Rune, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:56, archived)
# and mine's number 8
cheers to dean and nigel
(I helped save b3ta! bazman, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:34, archived)
# Seems like nobody likes mine...
...So I've done another one.
(I helped save b3ta! man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:37, archived)
# I've having a party on Friday Night
email me [email protected] for details.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:45, archived)
# Hooray!
will there be hats and cakes and fizzy pop?
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:46, archived)
# Jelly
is always good at parties!
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:48, archived)
# Can we have jelly
done in a bunny rabbit-shaped mould?
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:50, archived)
# bugger. wrong email address
only [email protected] and [email protected] now work. ARSE.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:56, archived)
# there will be booze
music and crisps. Lucy has got an friend from L.A coming over, and so we decided to have a party. Lucy will probably invite more girls - and me more boys.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:52, archived)
# Ooooooooooooooh girls
Should I wear nice clothes and brush my hair and stuff? I could even rub a Haze air freshener under my arms.
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:57, archived)
# just wear the crab mask as usual
the ladies go mad for it. actually Lucy mentioned that there was someone who you might quite like ...
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:00, archived)
# Has she got a
durable, shiny carapace and mighty pincers?
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:03, archived)
# she's blonde, slim ...
... but normally goes out with rugger buggers. Anyway, enough! I'm sure people don't want to hear about your sordid personal life ...
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:06, archived)
# I think
we probably do...
(I helped save b3ta! PeterSeychelles, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:20, archived)
# does she look like this?
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:24, archived)
# yay. i made that crab
i'd forgotten about her. she's lovely.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:26, archived)
# She frightens me
but in a good way
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:27, archived)
# panting bulldog
overfriendly. would probably hump your leg.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:30, archived)
# Trozan?
Ja... Trozan?? Ja!!
I love it...
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:27, archived)
# I find the idea of a rugger bugger
quite scary...
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:28, archived)
# This is great!
Teleporting is now possible. I want a big tub of ice-cream teleported to my living room right now.
here
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:39, archived)
# I'm trying to send some
but your receiving station appears to be engaged.

Is it already full of ice-cream?
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:40, archived)
# Try again
I've moved the traffic jam, it should work now..
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:45, archived)
# OK
get the cornets ready



(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:56, archived)
# Hmmm.I enjoyed that.
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:10, archived)
# you're my kind of lady
tell nicey that the divorce papers are in the post.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:19, archived)
# Woo!
I've scored!
See ya Nicey!
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:24, archived)
# Code Idea: "Which is Better?"
1. User has two fields to fill. They type in "daddy" and "chips"

2. The code queries google and calculates the percentages.

3. Then draws a comparitive graph which shows "CHIPS! It's 40% daddy and 60% chips. So the internet says CHIPS is better. Use this information wisely."

BTW: It would be very cute to record previous queries in a chart on the side.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:35, archived)
# I seem to have some code lying around
that does this :)

Give us a minute to talk to brinkster...
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:39, archived)
# yay. go cthonic.
although similar to googlewhacking, it's actuallly an important research tool.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:40, archived)
# Site of the day
This is one of the most soulful sites on the internet. This, I believe, is what the web should be all about.
www.pointlessopinion.f9.co.uk/
(milk_explosion, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:11, archived)
[challenge entry] defense class online
(scabby dog, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:11, archived)
# and this graphic
is for the main page..
(scabby dog, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:12, archived)
[challenge entry] where they go?..
(scabby dog, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:57, archived)
# variation on a theme
(I helped save b3ta! Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:51, archived)
# I wouldn't be messing
with that fish. hardcore I reckon
(I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:00, archived)
# I could really do with
some message board URL's posted on the embedex
so I can get some proper stats generating.

For those who had better things to do over the weekend,
the embedex is kinda like the blogdex but for message boards...

"wandering aimlessly around on message boards, so YOU don't have to..."
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 3:33, archived)
# blimey
you're fast at programming, aren't you?

Well done, sir.
(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:38, archived)
# It's kinda like a public beta
At the moment it only trawls 2 links deep - this will in the future vary from site to site.

The scoring system is really simple at the moment as well. I need some archived data
before I can do proper stats & scoring.

At the moment u get a "quick hit" of current links. Later it will help judge longer term
popularity etc.

If anyone thinks of anything else it should do (except making tea) let me know...
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:25, archived)
# er... I think you need to define the link depth
on a case by case basis. I.e. popbitch should only be one link deep.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:29, archived)
# Flibz
Are you going to enter the google programming contest?
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:43, archived)
# Nah
I dont do the languages they like...
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:33, archived)
# Yeah,
I said just then (points up)
"At the moment it only trawls 2 links deep - this will in the future vary from site to site. "

It does some things with internal links too, so although it scans internal links for
more URLs, it doesn't list them in results, thus avoiding 3.5 billion links to view_profile.php etc...
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:40, archived)
# making a drastic move from turkey farming
(I helped save b3ta! pete, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 3:17, archived)
# ah ... amsoft
... possibly one of the poorest games publishers the market has ever seen.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:03, archived)
# Are
they anything to do with Amstrad?

(Esteban, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:07, archived)
# Yes. Amsoft were the software publishing dept.
of amstrad. They published the first round of games for the CPC. This was a smart move as it meant that there were numours titles available when the platform launched, however most of them were piss poor spectrum conversions - with some even being written in BASIC and not MACHINE CODE. Which was a sin. In 1984.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:20, archived)
# All time wierd 'win big money prize' game
'Pimania' was written in BASIC.
Me and a friend printed out the listing (on one of those Alu foil electrostatic ZX printers) so we could try and win the prize by reading the source.
All we got was a room full of ozone and a headache.
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:36, archived)
# Christ
it took 3 years before someone won it as well:
http://www.void.jump.org/hardware/piwin.html
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:48, archived)
# I've never heard
of that game before,
but it sounds like a very good idea!
Somebody should make a game where you eventually have to physically go somewhere,
again... I would play
(I helped save b3ta! pete, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 4:56, archived)
# ah
i remember having long talks with some people about a b3ta game which mixed the physical and the virtual... and then couldn't be arsed to actaully do it.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:01, archived)
# It's great as an idea
but then again, they had to turn up at the location once a year for 3 years, dressed as a 'pi-man'.
Can you imagine trying to explian why you are lurking in some bushes dressed up as an idiot?

For those totally bewildered by the game (I was 13 and didn't quite get it then), here's the answer to the game
(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:02, archived)
# in the grand scheme of things
I guess that it wouldn't be too much of a hardship to go once a year,
even though you would look like an attacker
and stand a good chance of being arrested.

And couldn't the b3ta game invole some sort of cross-country drinking challenge?

Where all participants end up in a certain location, for example a remote zoo where the strangest animals in the world are kept?
I'm sure there must be one somwhere around here...
(I helped save b3ta! pete, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:25, archived)
# Reminds me
What was that book called where you had to look at each picture in the book to find the rabbit hidden on each page. This somehow was meant to lead you to a place in Britain where the author had hidden a golden rabbit brooch. Or something
(aneraseroflove excuse me...i have to go to space now, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:35, archived)
# Masquerade
It were called. Was ir really published in 1979. Feck I'm old!
(aneraseroflove excuse me...i have to go to space now, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 5:41, archived)
# I remember that
I spent ages looking at the book without the faintest idea what I supposed to do. Pretty pictures though.
(I helped save b3ta! PeterSeychelles, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:31, archived)
# bugger photoshopping
I'm off to colour things in instead...
(I helped save b3ta! AndyK, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 3:13, archived)
# Regarding that Um Bongo thread y'day...
I've actually worked in the Congo, and they've never heard of the stuff.

However, I can confirm that
a) the Forum Hotel in Brazzaville does a mighty fine G&T and
b) they *do* have Vimto in the Cameroon. Which would be nice except it doesn't rhyme.
(Freddie Woo, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 2:18, archived)
# Look, I'm just the ideas guy
And I couldn't photoshop to save my life. Soooo....

...as a request spot - anyone up to knocking out a spoof Am I Furtive Or Not site?

Unless it's already been done. In which case: coat.
(Freddie Woo, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 2:01, archived)
# Ooooh, oooh!
If no-one else wants it, i'll do it this evening
(I helped save b3ta! flibz, Mon 11 Feb 2002, 2:42, archived)
# How cool...
is this? I never knew they had such feelings.
(Kimbo, Sun 10 Feb 2002, 22:56, archived)

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