Which is better?Which is better?
The Internet says...
girlfriend
9
porn
91
PORN! It's 9% girlfriend and 91% porn. So the internet says PORN is better.
Use this information wisely.
(The Internet says...
girlfriend
9
porn
91
PORN! It's 9% girlfriend and 91% porn. So the internet says PORN is better.
Use this information wisely.
SqueakyG,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:56,
archived)
Ah-hmmm...http://home.worldonline.dk/~flimflam/black_beauty.jpg
Changed to a link as some people are at work.
(Changed to a link as some people are at work.
Kaiser,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:52,
archived)
![[challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif "Challenge Entry: Sites that haven't been made but should be"){kind=small}
Memories of the Revolutionary Fervour of YouthSome years ago we'd march and we'd shout
"Maggie Maggie Maggie, Out Out Out!"
Now that you're gone I feel bitter regret
Oh sod, different Maggie, I think I'll get
My coat
("Maggie Maggie Maggie, Out Out Out!"
Now that you're gone I feel bitter regret
Oh sod, different Maggie, I think I'll get
My coat
crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:20,
archived)
i don't have timemyself - but how about an animation of Rod Stewart coming into Margaret's bedroom singing 'Wake up Maggie' - and being unable to wake her. He leaves the room, and then Cliff appears from under the bed with his trousers around his ankles looking embarrased...
( monkeon schmonkeon,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:28,
archived)
oh deara whole series of cliff shagging dead royal women gags. can't be long before the queen mum pops her clogs. maybe we should register cliffshagsdeadroyalbirds.com or something
( crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:36,
archived)
but what willhappen when cliff dies - he's the king of pop.
( monkeon schmonkeon,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:40,
archived)
Yay - I caused an error in the "Which is better" scriptPut a forward slash in one of the inputs:
Microsoft VBScript runtime error '800a0005'
Invalid procedure call or argument: 'instr'
/b3tachthonic/better.asp, line 133
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:57,
archived)
Microsoft VBScript runtime error '800a0005'
Invalid procedure call or argument: 'instr'
/b3tachthonic/better.asp, line 133
oopsquick hacks are just that...
anyway, it just hit the bandwidth limit. That's 16.5 Mb in 1.5 hours. Hooray!
(anyway, it just hit the bandwidth limit. That's 16.5 Mb in 1.5 hours. Hooray!
chthonic,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:04,
archived)
*shocker*First rule of web programming:
Never trust the STUPID FUCKING user to input anything which is at all FUCKING sensible. They are all FUCKING STUPID.
(Never trust the STUPID FUCKING user to input anything which is at all FUCKING sensible. They are all FUCKING STUPID.
blah,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:05,
archived)
addendumfirst rule of anything that involves users: if there is a way to break it they will find it faster than you will.
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:14,
archived)
granted...... but you didn't swear, so you obviously aren't as frustrated with users as I am today. :)
( blah,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 9:11,
archived)
Tuk Tuk Tuk TUk TUk TUk
click and you will know why!
albinoblacksheep.com/flash/tunak.html
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:51,
archived)
click and you will know why!
albinoblacksheep.com/flash/tunak.html
Which is better?Geoff Capes OR Giant Haystacks...
Well apparently it was Giant Haystacks (with 58%) There is no justice...
(Well apparently it was Giant Haystacks (with 58%) There is no justice...
vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:50,
archived)
Can't believethat Bristol got 65% and Brighton got 35%... What's up with your machine chthonic??
( vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:58,
archived)
Doh!!!Why didn't I think of that....
( vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:24,
archived)
Bristol iswhere I usually go on the weekend...
Which is annoying coz I live in Bath, but I don't really know anyone in Bath :)
(Which is annoying coz I live in Bath, but I don't really know anyone in Bath :)
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 9:30,
archived)
Bath IsWhere I live, and it rocks.
You don't need to know anyone, just go down the hat & feather.
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 9:43,
archived)
You don't need to know anyone, just go down the hat & feather.
surely we can improve on thesecoffin designs? www.peachtreecasketsdirect.com/sub1.htm
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:45,
archived)
i especially lovethe way the bear is smiling.
( monkeon schmonkeon,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:49,
archived)
scan in thetramp finance ads - they are funnier.
( monkeon schmonkeon,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:44,
archived)
tramp finance directJust to re-iterate - could someone please scan in the tramp finance ads from this week's issue of Viz - Genius...
(Also I work for one of those dodgy companies that carries advertising for the likes of Ocean Finance - Give us your house and we'll give you a tenner)
((Also I work for one of those dodgy companies that carries advertising for the likes of Ocean Finance - Give us your house and we'll give you a tenner)
Monkeyboy,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:36,
archived)
I've had an idea...I thought I might write a CGI script that does a kind of photofit self portrait, where you pick different options for things like hair, eye colour, etc and then it puts together a picture using randomly selected matching parts. My question is - has this already been done and if not, does anybody have server space that allows CGI execution that they wouldn't mind hosting it on...
( man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:33,
archived)
yeah go for it!!yeah no probs. if you want i can even set you up with a sub account of your own at www.andyspad.net/~yourname!
( andy206,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:19,
archived)
You's a star!I'll have to write it first though.
And find some images...
It might need some perl modules installing to make it work (eg. GD). Hope that won't be a prob.
(And find some images...
It might need some perl modules installing to make it work (eg. GD). Hope that won't be a prob.
man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:46,
archived)
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....Yeah modules are all on there i think... if not i have super user access (thats the beauty of working for a hosting company!)
When you want your account setting up let me know (mailto:[email protected]) and i'll wack it up for ya!
(When you want your account setting up let me know (mailto:[email protected]) and i'll wack it up for ya!
andy206,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 9:22,
archived)
Cthonic!Help! I'm addicted to the which is better machine! aaargh!
( Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:18,
archived)
So I amIt's changing my entire philosphy. For
example, a bird in the hand (31%) is
definitely NOT worth two in the bush
(69%). I have to recalibrate all my
proverbs.
(example, a bird in the hand (31%) is
definitely NOT worth two in the bush
(69%). I have to recalibrate all my
proverbs.
mrbrong,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:23,
archived)
Actually I'm completely wrongI forgot to divide the 69% by two. Each bird is actually worth exactly the same, although more so if flightless.
Thank God for that.
(Thank God for that.
mrbrong,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:36,
archived)
I'm trying to findsomething that will beat Microsoft. Methinks the internet is heavily biased...
( man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:25,
archived)
Steve jobsbeats bill gates if that helps. Only 52-48 though
( Wifey,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:31,
archived)
BUT pc's beat macs!AND country beat rock -
damn the machine!
(damn the machine!
pep,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:36,
archived)
sex beats microsoftunsurpisingly considering the number one use of the net
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:52,
archived)
It's OKIt is bound to run out of bandwidth very soon...
( chthonic,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:28,
archived)
Can we find somewhere to host it?It seems to be one of the most popular toys we've had for ages. It'd be a shame if it went down.
( crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:29,
archived)
Rob and I are looking into itmostly the problem revolves around it being .asp rather than .php
Anyone know enough of both to translate it? My site can host .php...
(Anyone know enough of both to translate it? My site can host .php...
chthonic,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:36,
archived)
I could probably translate itor b4ta.com can host ASP and won't have a problem with the bandwidth if you want to put it there.
(
AndyK,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:47,
archived)
or I could cold fusion it on mine this evening....if ya like....
( flibz,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:44,
archived)
I laughed so hard I almost wet myself...HAVING YOUR ANUS RIPPED OUT BY WILD DOGS vs SEX WITH CRAB BLOKE?
HAVING YOUR ANUS RIPPED OUT BY WILD DOGS! (51-49)
(HAVING YOUR ANUS RIPPED OUT BY WILD DOGS! (51-49)
man/child/goblin should be old enough to know better by now,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:39,
archived)
sorrybut the internet never lies, unlike that cheating camera which you can manipulate to your evil means.
MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!
(MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!
Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:47,
archived)
it's a truly greatthing - but a suggestion:
how about making a ticker of all the latest enteries live as they are asked - that we can keep open on our screens - prefrably one that looks like a stockmarket board.
(how about making a ticker of all the latest enteries live as they are asked - that we can keep open on our screens - prefrably one that looks like a stockmarket board.
monkeon schmonkeon,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:52,
archived)
and which danceson the hour to the tune of "the Peanut Seller"
( AndyK,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:54,
archived)
Lame joke of the dayI dropped my PDA into a bowl of ice cream.
Now I have a Palm Sundae.
(Now I have a Palm Sundae.
Whiffert Support the Free Balogna Movement!,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:15,
archived)
heard this on the radioa drunk man at a party taps the hostess on the shoulder
"Do lemons have legs?"
"No, why?"
"Ah, I'm afraid I just squeezed your budgie into my gin"
("Do lemons have legs?"
"No, why?"
"Ah, I'm afraid I just squeezed your budgie into my gin"
crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:18,
archived)
Even worse...Did you hear about the PDA for horses?
Its called the "Neeeeigh Palm"...
...
I'll get my coat :)
(Its called the "Neeeeigh Palm"...
...
I'll get my coat :)
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:22,
archived)
The worst I think...I have this big piece of metal coming out of my hand, I got it when I went in to Dixons... It's a Handspring.
( vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:27,
archived)
More bad PDA jokes please!I made a tree out of lots of PDA's. Guess what its called?
... [everyone: Palm tree] ...
No, actually its a Palm Beech :)
(... [everyone: Palm tree] ...
No, actually its a Palm Beech :)
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:32,
archived)
Why did the blind PDA user hire a psychic?He needed someone to read his Palm :)
( Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:36,
archived)
On a flight...Asked to speak to the Captain and when he came out he looked like a massive hand...
Apparently he was a Palm Pilot...
RUN getcoat proc
(Apparently he was a Palm Pilot...
RUN getcoat proc
vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:38,
archived)
Worst one in the world... ever...Why did the German torturer get given a PDA by mistake?
Because he had called out "Hans! Bring vice here!"
...
Coat was on already, i'm halfway out the door :)
(Because he had called out "Hans! Bring vice here!"
...
Coat was on already, i'm halfway out the door :)
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:42,
archived)
Clutching at straws now...A mate of mine, Si decided he was going to use my pc. When I got back my pc was tiny... That's the last time I allow Si-on computers..
( vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:11,
archived)
Nooooooo!That makes me feel better about this:
Have you heard about the new "small aquatic salamanders and fruit" craze?
Apparently, all the kids want an Apple Newt-on.
(Have you heard about the new "small aquatic salamanders and fruit" craze?
Apparently, all the kids want an Apple Newt-on.
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:50,
archived)
.Have you got your coat? I got mine and left ages ago...
( vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:59,
archived)
YeahI'm shouting these from down the road ;)
( Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 9:01,
archived)
Did you hear about the Irish woman who swalled a PDA?She was called Cassie O'Pocketviewer
;)
(;)
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:55,
archived)
Theres a new PC you can swallow,but it caused impotence.
It was the Micro-soft Tablet PC...
(thats a reference to this:
http://www.microsoft.com/windowsxp/tabletpc/
If you are unfamiliar...)
(It was the Micro-soft Tablet PC...
(thats a reference to this:
http://www.microsoft.com/windowsxp/tabletpc/
If you are unfamiliar...)
Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 8:56,
archived)
HahaYes, that's exactly what it'll be like. Exactly. People like me going to their parties.
( crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:09,
archived)
very goodMo Mowlem beats Anne Widdicombe 57% to 43%.
Surely it should be higher!
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:10,
archived)
Surely it should be higher!
Bugger...I gave the "which is better" thingy "I could stay on here all day" vs "I have work to do"....
Guess what it came up with... not happy... 76/24... Arse
(Guess what it came up with... not happy... 76/24... Arse
vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:04,
archived)
Goshthat is awful what you've done to his face Nacho...
( chthonic,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:54,
archived)
I made him pourbaileys, zambucca, vodka and either Stella or Guiness in to his face. This was the end result by 10.00pm.
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:59,
archived)
you started on a swift vodka at Snakey,then when we met Wangolini we had slippery nipples - as in the shot drink rather than that being a physical description. But then again I can only speak for myself.
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:17,
archived)
Heh hehJust be thankful I didn't get the camera out the other night... Turned out very messy...
( vulga is a foul mouthed cunt,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:06,
archived)
OH! Moon-Faced Mongolian Massive from MolscombeI feel guilty that you didn't make it to work on Saturday. But if I'd have known that I would have stayed round to wrench some more. I still managed to make it into town on Saturday afternoon though.
(,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:20,
archived)
Kittyroids!! Die Feline Skum!!I know how much you all hate cute, innocent, helpless little pussy's so heres your chance to blow up floating kitty heads with an invincible triangle shaped spaceship!!
Visit: www.andyspad.net/misc/kittyroids/index.html
Sorry this is so naff, i based it on a free .fla file i found on a flashers site! (no not dirtymacs.com) I'll try and find a better one with levels n stuff later on!
Enjoy!!!
Andy
(Visit: www.andyspad.net/misc/kittyroids/index.html
Sorry this is so naff, i based it on a free .fla file i found on a flashers site! (no not dirtymacs.com) I'll try and find a better one with levels n stuff later on!
Enjoy!!!
Andy
andy206,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:50,
archived)
yay!shit hacks of found .fla's have a long and happy history here. nice one. Can I suggest adding a kicking soundtrack and some explosion effects to finish it off? Have you seen my monkeyroids game? (Never did get round to finishing it, or making it work on macs)
( crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:54,
archived)
wow!that rocks! i gotta find a better .fla and get me bloody soundcard replaced!! i'm living in a silent world at the moment!
( andy206,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:09,
archived)
Cheersit would be a lot better if I ever bothered to add things like score tables and stuff though. To be fair, it's done in director rather than flash. I never did get into games programming in actionscript, doesn't seem to be as powerful as shockwave, but I suppose there's likely to be a good engine out there somewhere.
( crab_bloke),
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 7:13,
archived)
Wow - that research tool is <i>actually useful</i>!Most of the answers it gives are spot on!
I'm a bit worried that Gareth vs Will gives a 100-0 result in favour of Will. Looks like they fixed the internet as well as the phone poll.
(I'm a bit worried that Gareth vs Will gives a 100-0 result in favour of Will. Looks like they fixed the internet as well as the phone poll.
chthonic,
Mon 11 Feb 2002, 6:47,
archived)
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