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This is a question Celebrations, anniversaries and milestones

Willenium says: I just reached the big 10 on b3ta, so tell us your stories of big date milestones from relationships, birthdays, work and life-changing choices.

(, Thu 25 Sep 2014, 14:19)
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were the rules about whether the jam or the cream went on first?

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:10, 1 reply)
Yes.
Clearly the cream goes first.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:11, closed)
*family fortunes noise* the cream goes in the bin
closely followed by the jam.

scones need butter. nothing else. just butter.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:32, closed)
But that wouldn't be a delicious Devonshire cream tea.
It would be the sort of thing commoners from up north might eat.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:37, closed)

they can't afford butter up north. they eat margarine.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:22, closed)
FUCK DEVON
a propur cream tea is jam then cream you heathen cunt.
'ansome
(, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 4:37, closed)
That's the fucking Cornish way method.
And those daft bastards don't even have any motorways.
(, Mon 29 Sep 2014, 15:45, closed)
jesus love ... how much do you hate yourself?

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:37, closed)
hot scone with melted butter?
come on, who wouldn't eat the shit out of that??
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:45, closed)
The issue isn't eating that.
The issue is preferring butter to clotted cream and jam.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:47, closed)

Butter AND jam AND cream. In that order. Followed by a defibrillator.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:25, closed)
A cheese scone with butter is the best. Stuff with fruit then a nice piece of Lancashire Tasty.
Cream and jam, they are for POOFS!
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:48, closed)
Well lube me up, I must be a poof.
Wait til I tell the Mrs. Mind=blown.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:51, closed)
Nice how you put yourself straight (pun intended) away into the role of submissive bottom.

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:25, closed)
Yew shure do say the pwettiest things to a gal.
I'm sure I've seen '1st submissive bottom' as a technical credit after a film.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:39, closed)
Gay donkeys now is it?

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 23:48, closed)
people who can afford jam

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:59, closed)
It's probably not even butter she's eating, but axle grease scraped from goods trucks stopped at the sidings
I imagine it's a bit Hunger Games over there.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:04, closed)
it'll be worse than that
it'll be low fat spread
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:06, closed)
Hmmmm ...
Almost as lush as shapers cottage cheese on a snack-a-jack
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:10, closed)
Might as well eat polystyrene and reduce landfill while you're at it.

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:36, closed)
With just a touch of hydrogenation catalyst to give it that buttery yellow.

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:08, closed)
The colour is added (usually beta carotene)
Pure hydrogenated vegetable fat is white.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:27, closed)
^margarine expert

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:33, closed)

margarine expert went to school
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:37, closed)
and some people say secondary education has become a complete fucking joke

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:42, closed)
Shit, really?
I was hinting that leaving the Ni/SiO2 catalyst in place would have contributed to such metal decline as to subscribe to heretical beliefs w.r.t. scones.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:37, closed)
What metal decline?
Doesn't make any sense.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:51, closed)
Fuck, are you one of those butter-only freaks as well then?

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:58, closed)
Jam is gross
Fuck your glistening period fruits
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:57, closed)
Was the glistening period just after the golden age or something?

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:03, closed)
Jam is just fruit and sugar.
Fruit.
And sugar.
(, Mon 29 Sep 2014, 10:06, closed)
Just for the avoidance of doubt
You are a massive fucking foodwrong. How you can be so picky when YHHPCCIYM is quite beyond me.
(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:58, closed)
To be fair, that is the penis equivalent of a dry scone with all the joy of jam and cream taken away

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:01, closed)
'Going Cornish' is where a mod lubes up a dog with clotted cream.

(, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:08, closed)
And then
fucks his own sister through his mother's mouth.
(, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:30, closed)

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