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This is a question B3TA fixes the world

Moon Monkey says: Turn into Jeremy Clarkson for a moment, and tell us about the things that are so obviously wrong with the world, and how they should be fixed. Extra points for ludicrous over-simplification, blatant mis-representation, and humourous knob-gags.

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 22 Sep 2011, 12:53)
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Make it legal to physically attack supermarket self-service machines.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 14:23, 8 replies)

Get even by getting a Henry Rollins style barcode tattoo on your wrist. Make it for something cheap like mushy peas and you can just scan your wrist accidentally and put the expensive thing you're holding into your bag fo' life.
(I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 14:47, closed)
Hahahahahahahahahaha
Get a receipt for, like 127 tins of mushy peas and walk away with a whole month's shopping hahahahahahahah

*considers*
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 14:50, closed)

You'd only be able to buy things that weigh the same as the mushy peas. You could make a gameshow out of it.
(anonymousreality tickled your fancy on, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 15:03, closed)

We'd need a scouse Dale Winton to present it, "Next time you hear the beep, think of the fun you could be having on supermarket theif!"
(I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 15:06, closed)
"Please place item into the bagging area"
"UNEXPECTED ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA"
"Please place item into the bagging area"
"UNEXPECTED ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA"

ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH!
(I helped save b3ta! Monsieur Monster I heard Seriously talk the first time. in here., Fri 23 Sep 2011, 15:20, closed)
Like this?
b3ta.com/board/10525243
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 15:41, closed)
Nope.
Like this: www.b3ta.com/board/10546486
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 19:20, closed)
Do what I do.
When they give you trouble, scream "Evil robot, evil robot!" then flee the supermarket gibbering and pulling your own hair. You look like a twat, but hey, free shopping!
(universalpsykopath loves what you've done with your hair., Fri 23 Sep 2011, 16:07, closed)

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