A worker wants to complain about his arsehole boss....
His mate tells him to go see HR. So he marches to
the office, takes the lift all the way up to the HR,
steps out of the lift and what does he see? A pony
at the front desk in a clown costume. Another is
dressed like a mime, and a third pony is standing
upright, at open mike on a makeshift stage.


"Uh, is this the right place to make a complaint?"
asked the man, taken back.


"Sure", said the clown pony, "we're humourous horses!"
( maninahat Too many cocks spoil the brothel., Mon 12 Aug 2024, 23:11, 2 replies, latest was 8 months ago)

I asked my cat if I could borrow 2p because I didn't have enough change
but it said no.
Turns out I've got the tightest pussy in the world
(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Sun 11 Aug 2024, 9:41, 3 replies, latest was 8 months ago)

I entered my prized rooster into the "Biggest Foul Contest", and he won the Blue Ribbon.
Turns out, I had the biggest cock in the world.
( atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Sun 11 Aug 2024, 4:35, 2 replies, latest was 8 months ago)

Who is the smallest presenter of nature documentaries on tv?
David Atomborough
( Octo I ruin everything., Wed 31 Jul 2024, 22:12, 3 replies, latest was 9 months ago)

What's the most dangerous cocktail?
A peril spritz.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 31 Jul 2024, 19:40, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

Waiter, when I wear a green jumper to the restaurant, you serve me salad, and when I wear red you bring me tomato soup.

Yes sir, all our meals are complementary.
(Max Harvey, Tue 30 Jul 2024, 9:20, Reply)

My watch repair shop always opens at exactly 9am.

Like clockwork?

I bloody love it.
(Max Harvey, Tue 30 Jul 2024, 9:20, Reply)

The best bank robbers always perform at the heist level.

(Max Harvey, Tue 30 Jul 2024, 9:19, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

The Paris Olympic opening ceremony was completely crazy
Totally in Seine
(Smug Bastard LOL, Fri 26 Jul 2024, 19:28, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

I hear J.D. Vance's attorney just made a $130,000 payment to a pouffe

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Jul 2024, 0:40, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

What American VP is also known for their pork dish?
Ham-a-la Harris
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Mon 22 Jul 2024, 10:34, Reply)

What is the alter ego of homosexual Superman?
Crack Bent.
( atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Mon 22 Jul 2024, 3:51, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

What is the alter ego of Superman who, as president, brought the apartheid system of racial segregation to an end and negotiated a transition to majority rule in South Africa?
F. W. de Klerk Kent.
( brb top shit, Sun 21 Jul 2024, 19:00, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

What girlfriend of Superman keeps the smell down in bar toilets?
Loo-ice Lane
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Sun 21 Jul 2024, 16:18, Reply)

What is the alter ego of superman who works in a shoe shop and doesn't have your size?
Clerk Can't.
( Octo I ruin everything., Sun 21 Jul 2024, 9:48, Reply)

What is the alter ego of arrogant Superman?
Clark Kunt.
( atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Sun 21 Jul 2024, 3:02, Reply)

What is the alterego of particle physicist Superman?
Quark Kent.
( Octo I ruin everything., Thu 18 Jul 2024, 17:35, Reply)

England's performance last night!!!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 15 Jul 2024, 9:49, Reply)

Trump and Biden walk into a bar.
Someone suggests the bar be lowered.
(Mr Science (in search of something original to put here), Fri 12 Jul 2024, 20:11, Reply)

It's 2025, Donald Trump and Joe Biden walk into a bar.
Barman says "Sorry, we don't serve spirits".
Cos they've both died of old age, Geddit?
Ithangyew!
(Covid69 Boris variant., Tue 9 Jul 2024, 17:18, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

Donald Trump walks into a bar
and then denies it happened.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Tue 9 Jul 2024, 8:51, 2 replies, latest was 9 months ago)

Joe Biden walks into a bar
Senility's a bitch.
( An Egg ,D, Tue 9 Jul 2024, 1:27, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

What did the pirate say to the plastic parrot?
"Pretty polymer!"
(Mr Science (in search of something original to put here), Mon 8 Jul 2024, 2:20, 1 reply, 9 months ago)

"He was arrested for curd crawling."
I heard the peelers got him!
(Mr Science (in search of something original to put here), Fri 5 Jul 2024, 15:57, Reply)

Did you hear about the lemon that liked to fuck prostitutes?
He was arrested for curd crawling.
( Octo I ruin everything., Fri 5 Jul 2024, 13:31, Reply)

Your mum’s so fat…
…I can’t even squeeze in the punchli___ !
( atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Sun 30 Jun 2024, 23:30, Reply)

There' a new eco group formed of farmers.
They're called 'Just Top Soil'.
(Mr Science (in search of something original to put here), Sat 29 Jun 2024, 19:04, Reply)

did you hear about the rapper that released a record which was total wank?
Semenem
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sat 29 Jun 2024, 17:12, 9 replies, latest was 10 months ago)

At the GP's ...
Patient: Doctor, doctor, my face is an emoji!
Doctor: [Like]
(Mr Science (in search of something original to put here), Sat 29 Jun 2024, 12:32, Reply)