You Can't Teach An Old Dog New Tricks

Well, actually you can. A couple of hours ago, at the ripe old age of 50, I sat and passed my driving test.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 2:45, 26 replies)

Congratulations!
Welcome to a life of frustration, anger, ridiculous unexpected costs and a growing belief that at least 40% of the population can't possibly have sat the same test you did.
( MatJ LOOK, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 2:59, closed)

Evidence Suggests
that I'm the only driver in Melbourne who actually uses his indicators.....
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 3:16, closed)

You'll grow out of it...
I am quite happy to admit that in Six years of living in Indonesia I have not once gotten behind the wheel of a car! (Insurance stuff...)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 4:56, closed)

Look left, look right
& get a snorkel for your fourby.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Wed 16 Feb 2011, 5:56, closed)

I know QLD is a bit away from Melbourne
but I'm glad my hilux has a snorkel.
This my my front yard normally,
www.b3tards.com/u/8bd6713dba1ca7694a8f/flood4.jpg
and this what it was like a few weeks ago, and unfortunately inside as well.
www.b3tards.com/u/8bd6713dba1ca7694a8f/flood2.jpg
www.b3tards.com/u/8bd6713dba1ca7694a8f/flood3.jpg
www.b3tards.com/u/8bd6713dba1ca7694a8f/flood1.jpg

We got off pretty lightly considering 1/2 hr down the road, whole houses were swept away
(M61A1 CUPID- STUNTS, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 7:10, closed)

Eek wet snake!

( Cactus 1 doesn't care what you think on, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 11:31, closed)

That Eastern Brown swimming in our front yard
according to a scale of relative toxicity (tested on mice- using a scale of milligrams of venom/kgs of weight of prey, causing death)has venom roughly 220 times more toxic than a diamond back rattle snake.
(M61A1 CUPID- STUNTS, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 12:09, closed)

Yebbut
Rattlers have only got to take out wheezing, overweight Americans whereas yer Aussie snake has to go head to head with the meanest, toughest blokes in the world. Stands to reason that they have to be more poisonous dunnit!
( SteamedCleaner, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 16:37, closed)

Even Though
I live in Melbourne, I'm still getting an old style Landrover - with a winch, a snorkel and a beer-fridge. I intend getting out into the bush and do some serious off-roading. Better add a sat-phone and a distress beacon....

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 7:19, closed)

I usually use this analogy when talking about radio equipment...
... but it's literally true, too.

Would you prefer to cross the desert in an old Landrover, or a new Landrover?
(gordonjcp, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 7:39, closed)

On a unicycle

( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 8:25, closed)

The Reason
for an old Landrover (which is probably the same reason you prefer old radio gear) is that, if it goes wrong in the middle of nowhere I have a fair chance of being able to fix it. Or it least jerry-rig it so I could get back to civilisation.

I might not have had a driving license but I've been tearing engines apart and rebuilding them since I was 14. It's the computer controlled engines which I can't fix. Not without the software and cables. But give me a car, the Haynes manual for it and a few basic tools, and I'll have the bastard running in a jiffy.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:23, closed)

that may be the case you wizzy superhero you, but there is a reason no one drives them here...
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:34, closed)

And Here is....

( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:52, closed)

I agree
older vehicles are brilliant, a phwack with a hammer and the twist of a screwdriver and your good to go, but if a chip blows in a modern vehicle your stuck. (This apparently was the reason my brothers car was running as if it was on fumes with a full tank, something to do with the computer controlled fuel injection thingymabob).
(Sadarse works like Mist condensing mud flaps, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:43, closed)

Exactly
same with my old (1983)hilux diesel.
(M61A1 CUPID- STUNTS, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 12:10, closed)

Now here is a sensible vehicle.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 17:38, closed)

*gets off the road*

( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Wed 16 Feb 2011, 5:48, closed)

Sniffing
the white lines again were you mate?

:)

cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:24, closed)

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
something like that, at least!
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:29, closed)

Congrats.

( speedyballbangpots, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:33, closed)

not sure that's a new trick legless...
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:42, closed)

Driving in Melbourne is bloody scary.
Being used to country roads, my mind wasn't wired up to look out for trams.
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:46, closed)

Arrgh...
The fucking hook-turn. Yes, I know how to do them, no, it makes no fucking sense whatsoever.

My first few weeks in Melbourne I was nearly mown down by drivers doing what in any other country in the world would be an illegal manoeuvre. I was eventually educated by a young copper who couldn't keep the grin off his face.

To turn right, in Melbourne where you share the road with trams, you start from the far left lane (remember you're turning right...), loiter in the left lane, blocking oncoming traffic, until the lights in front of you go red and then turn smartly right and try not to mow down unsuspecting pedestrians....

Did I say I understood the hook-turn? I may have being lying...

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 10:58, closed)

Move to another state
only Victoria has that abomination of a law, amongst others.
(M61A1 CUPID- STUNTS, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 9:38, closed)

Ha!
Passed mine at 40 in the UK and 30 in the US :)

Congrats though :)
( snee held his breath since, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 14:04, closed)