Nightmarish
I just remembered, I have an actual "encounter".

No lie, I was sleeping round a friend's house with a few others after having a few drinks, woke up on his living room floor at around 3am and saw a shadowy figure standing there, having a wank! I could swear it was there. But, interestingly, when I actually got up and looked, there was nothing. Although, I had eaten a bit of cheese, was still a tad pissed, and am short sighted, so if I saw anything, it was probably a curtain.
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Sat 22 Apr 2006, 14:09, Reply)

Dodgy Car Stereos...
While reading various scary QOTW stories and trying not to be a ickle bit frightened...

Some twat outside turns his car stereo on and at a very loud volume, hence weird sounding voice coming from nowhere!

Took me a few seconds to work out what it was and where it was coming from.....however scared the pants off me and took me a few seconds to stop shaking!

Must stop reading these stories and get on wth work!
(Dr Mandingo isn't particularly bothered...., Sat 22 Apr 2006, 13:46, Reply)

my house.
i moved into this house almost 7 years ago. now its not an old house or on a burial ground or any shit like that. its an average house next door to a pub and an offy.

the house was 8 years old when i moved in and we had 2 previous occupants. Mr biddulph died when the car boot door hit his head, he went into the living room and passed away. the other was Mrs Jamieson she just died or old age we think. heart attack or some such.

well my room for the last 6 years has never matched the temperature of the rest of the house. its always much hotter or much colder. and every now and then i wake up to find the attic hatch wide open. im not scared of our ghosts. in fact when im scared at night (i have an anxiety problem when i try to sleep) i talk to them :) my friendly ghosts... wish theyd sort the bloody heating out tho!!
(Serbitar Has a furry shit canon called Whitey., Sat 22 Apr 2006, 13:00, Reply)

My legendary ouija board
Made from the sign I nicked from Torquay's DHSS office back in '93. One night my housemates and I decided to get cracking on the board. Oooooh, it was weird, we talked to the guy who apparently used to live in the house back in the day. The stuff he was saying explained much of the weird presences felt by the residents of the house at odd times (footsteps along the hall, the feeling that someone's standing in the doorway watching you, etc etc).

Anyway, my housemate's girlfriend was a bit sceptical, so she said "If you're really there, do something to prove it." At that moment, all the lights went out, but not just in our house. The lights had gone out all over the centre of Torquay...

Five minutes later we'd abandoned the board and our soiled garments and were out in the streets witnessing the chaos and looting...

Oh, and if you're looking to scare the bejesus out of yourself, go to Berry Pomeroy castle in South Devon (somewhere between Paignton and Totnes). I have a few tales from there, it's the best...
(sundaeg1rl Lady Two-Jugs, Sat 22 Apr 2006, 10:38, Reply)

Not so much the result of messing with the Dark Side...
But I was out on a trip with my friend and his parents at their cabin, way deep in the sticks.
And I was sleeping one night after an uneventful day.
I wake up an some godforsaken hour and I see this massive shadowy figure standing at the foot of my bed.
Scared the hell out of me.

Probably just some sleep-induced hallucination.
(UndeadChicken Eating poultry farmers since 1987, Sat 22 Apr 2006, 5:25, Reply)

Dead by dawn...
When I was just finishing my edumacation, me and my GF at the time decided to go for a semi-romantic shag-weekend at a deserted cabin in the woods not far from where we lived. (I'd been there before with a few mates, but that was another story).

Anyway, we went, and found this weird book and tape recorder that some old guy had apparently left when he was in the cabin for some reason. he'd found the book on an archaeological dig or something. Anyway, we played the tape that was in, and it was the old guy reciting weird incantations which, it seems, he'd translated from the book.

The tape's playing, and it's all getting a mite spooky, when this couple of posh types turn up, claiming to be relatives of the old bloke on the tape or something, and they've found more pages from the book. Fucking weird, we reckon, but as long as they didn't mind us 'using' their shack for violently intrusive sexual acts, we weren't right fussed. I was a bit pissed, but somewhere along the line, the mrs turns out to be possessed by the evil released when the incantations tape (not the Mike Oldfield album, before you ask) was played. And this weird local type turns up with his mrs who was called Bobby-Joe (how we laughed!) and they go a bit mental.

So, things get gradually more and more fucked up, as this evil shit basically takes out everyone apart from me and the old bloke's daughter (who was well worth a fuck - bit of a touch that the mrs had already copped it). I wander down to the basement cos the foxy daughter wants me to get a couple of pages from the book that the silly bint's dropped down there. So I go. And get attacked by fit burd's undead mother. What a cunt she was. Talk about meet the fucking parents. Anyway, all goes ok-ish, in the end, apart from the bit where someone draws on my hand with biro, and cos I've gone a wee bit mental with still not getting to pork the teasing bitch, I cut my hand off with a chainsaw. Which I reckon makes me pretty fucking cool. Fuckin' A. Believe.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, I got those pages from the basement, and old bloke's daughter is fucking well impressed. She's just about to submit to my demands of filthy bumsex when she comes out with all this shit about having to quickly recite some incantations to get rid of the evil or whatever, so I'm like, "yeah, whatever" and playing a bit of pocket billiards to get myself nice and hard for her, right, and just as I'm getting ready to spear her roughly up the arse...

Right, you'll never see this coming, right.

Seriously...

She fucking DIES. And THEN, as if missing out on top shit upper-class bum-crumpet wasn't enough, right? Right. The fucking ICING on the cunting cake, right? The incantations she utters with her dying breaths, which should have been used to gasp my name in the throws of fucking exctasy, right? She only fucking opens a portal back to the 13th fucking century and I get sucked back in time to there. Right? I mean, seriously. What a cunt.

I'm a reasonable bloke. She could have just said she had the shits or something.

Bloody lesbian.
( Tone Depear fucking rocks, Sat 22 Apr 2006, 3:54, Reply)

fredred
you twat, i'm off my tits on teh bad drugs, and that scared the shit out of me.
( The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Sat 22 Apr 2006, 3:30, Reply)

My friend's boyfriend's next door neighbours...
(uncle's grandma's pet dog's mum... yeah, na...)

These guys had been doing an exorcism for a week, and ended up killing the girl in question.

Fun times for all!
(kadee may or may not be a nymphomaniac, Sat 22 Apr 2006, 3:10, Reply)

Freddred...
I was scaring kids with that last summer. I'm immune to German caffiene drink ads.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 21 Apr 2006, 23:23, Reply)

stairway to heaven backwards
Stairway to heaven played backwards!!
This one has spooked loads of people i showed it to.
play it forward then read the words.
play it reversed then show puzzlement, you dont understand! then read the words, listen again and feel your hairs stand on end.
jeffmilner.com/backmasking.htm
(freddred, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 23:08, Reply)

wierd and spooky out take
Many of you will have seen this clip from the outtake of a German car ad. The makers claim that they never altered the film and the white image in front of the car when it passed through the trees was real. media.putfile.com/classic26
(freddred, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 23:00, Reply)

chants to raise the dead
A bunch of us were doing the ouiji board etc when i remembered the chant to raise the dead. i was a working class scallywag and the others were pretend poor students of rich parents etc Cant remember where i heard it on some daft coe=medy show. But i had them chanting to raise the dead, "OHWA TAPREE KIAM" or to translate "oh what a prick i am".
(freddred, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 22:53, Reply)

wooooooh!
At last, something close to my own heart. I've written up my exploits in ghost hunting here:
www.btinternet.com/~dr_paul_lee/vigils.htm
- I've dabbled with Ouija Boards and stuff and most of it is just bull!

or, for more general ghost stuff;
www.btinternet.com/~dr_paul_lee/index.html#ghosts
(Wrecked Tums, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 20:54, Reply)

oddgodHMK
I just did what oddgod did and got myself all scared silly...
(scratchy, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 20:54, Reply)

Penn and Teller
Apple logies, if this has already been pointed out. Penn and Teller did a very interesting series an episode of which was based on Ouidja Boards. They got a group of people who were using one, then blindfolded them. It worked fine. Then without telling them they turned the board upside down. The pointer kept moving but to where the letters used to be. Proving that it is not ghosties but some sort of subliminal thingymajig.

Also i did one with some mates as a kid and spoke to scooby doo and popeye which first raised my suspicions that we might not be communicating with the 'other side'. It did say my mum used to take lots of acid though which i always suspected but i have no idea how Dangermouse would have come by such information.
( lord turkey boy and the cleft of venus, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 20:51, Reply)

Oddly enough
And this will make me no friends at all, but I'm part of a paranormal investigation team based in Preston. We've made little jaunts to various manors, ruins, theatres and pubs. Lots of pubs. All over the country. There's 8 of us in the team but I'm the only one who can drive, which is a right pisser.

Anyway, one of our number is a Welsh lad by the name of Sion. Deeply Catholic, also committed to heavy metal. Go figure. Now, back home in the Rhonda Valley Sion was the head server at his church, at which the priest so happened to be the diocese "exorcist". Usually his job consisted of people saying they'd moved into a new house and something didn't feel right, would he mind coming out to bless it? Which means yes, holy water being flicked around, prayers, incense, crucifixes, the lot.

Now one place we did a report on not long ago was of a house he'd been to that merited the priest waking him up at 3 in the morning, saying "Get your clothes on, we have to go out right now". Arriving at the house during one of the warmest summers the Rhonda has had in years, albeit early in the morning, despite the heating being on the cold inside the house was by all accounts unbearable. Each room felt like an icebox, with a mounting feeling of unease as our two church types blunder about the house, hearing a whisper on every breeze and seeing a movement in every shadow. They did their incantation stuff as quick as they could before hightailing it out of there.

On no less than three occasions within the following weeks were the Sion and the priest called to this house again. After four visits and blessings, the phone calls stopped and Sion found some time to do a spot of reading on the house. Up until very recently it had been home to a widower who had died alone and lain undiscovered in the house for several days. The gentleman in question was greatly traumatised by the death of his wife some years before and had responded to it by hoarding a great amount of everything, Mr Treabus style. According to the Police who arrived to take the body away, the house's heating system was off as there was too much hoarded junk to reach the boiler or any of the radiators. The horrendous cold in the valley and in the house had contributed greatly to our distressed old man's undignified demise.

No apologies for length, but believe it or not this is the shortest case study we have.
(BassNinja, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 18:45, Reply)

Apparently...
Amazing how many of the supposedly 'real' ghost stories have the word 'apparently' in it, and are usually heard from a distant friend of a friend. ho hum. Used to fuck about with ouijja boards, but it really is all bollocks. Wikipedia Occam's razor and that should sort it all out.
( HelloIamAdam and Adam is my name, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 18:26, Reply)

Spooky
Once I searched on Google image search for 'ghosts'.

Couldn't sleep for weeks.
(ratthingbazzterd, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 18:19, Reply)

Seance
Was eleven and on a school trip with my very slightly odd friend. Her mother was a witch she told me (many a time). And she had taught her to contact the dead. Blah blah blah.

We were staying in quite an old building and there were the usual stories 'some say that she still knits on the balcony...' and this delighted my friend who decided she would try and contact some of the restless dead wandering the site.

During some time we had to ourself, me, her and another clueless friend went and sat down outside, eyes closed, holding hands. She muttered and then suddenly, the air was feeling very thick and there was a humming noise.

"Can you feel that?"

Various 'oohs' and 'aahs'. Then the air became rather painful and alarmed we opened our eyes to see... dum dum dum! a swarm of large, hungry insects had just come down to feast on silly pre-teen girl flesh. Cue running away and screaming.

Had the bitemarks for weeks.
(ladyintheradiator, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 18:18, Reply)

I've seen a ghost once, and only once.
It scared the shit out of me. I could feel its icy presence beside me. I turned round to find the pale blue shimmering form of yoda staring at me.

Of course, I was tripping my nuts off on shrooms.
(Fido Dido, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 18:10, Reply)

This probably doesn't count, but
I got quite drunk on JD while playing the Call of Cthulhu pc game (this) late at night. The next morning I found I'd cut my left forearm repeatedly with a small knife then spread the blood about so from my shoulders to fingers were red with it. I'm not entirely sure why.
(0800221155 Coldseal windows, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 17:46, Reply)

I've only really messed with it once...
...I saw hell and the devil.

Talking dogs, cannibals, ape-men.

And the cows - the endless cows.

I never read The Far Side again.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 17:45, Reply)

the man on the roof
me, my friend, my sister and her soft friend had all been watchin signs at my friends house. me and my friend started telling my sister and her friend that we could see a monster on the roof

we all live in the same street but my sisters friend lived at the top of the street and would have to walk past the roof with the so called monster on it.

so we played up the whole what if the aliens are coming for us. then my sisters friend said she had to go home.

so my friend snook out the back door of his house wearing a wolf mask and fury gloves and carrying a plastic knife. he ran around the back of the houses and waited behind a corner that she would walk past.

she left the house. i told her my friend was in the toilet. she got to the corner near the house were the "monster" was on the roof when my friend jumped out.

she legged it screaming to her house. her mum came out and then my friend took his mask off an we all went over to her house. she was crying. her face was a picture. she didn't speak to us for a month tho .
(torture bunny lives under the kitchen sink, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 17:36, Reply)

This reminds me of my time in the Noweigan olympic relay-javelin team.
There were four of us, but I was the only non-dwarf. Anyway, practice had been going well, so we decided to get out of the office for a bit and went hiking up Snowdon for a week. We'd been warned that it was usually only about a day's hike to the summit, so to make it last we spiralled the mountain instead, like some sort of giant obtuse screw.
By day nine, we'd reached the halfway point but realised we'd forgotten to bring any tea bags.
Needless to say we put our relay-javelin skills into action and managed to stab a passing German with a well aimed spork. He died from a beautiful heamothorax. As we rifled through his backback, however, all we could find were decaffeinated teabags.

We all vowed that that would be our last venture into the dark and evil world of german backpacks.

However, ten years later they released the first Harry Potter film which forced me to become a satanic nun and practice wicca and voodoo and other dumbarsed shit which preys on the pockets of wankers who will believe anything. I also burn my skin off to stop myself catching demonic viruses in the underworld.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 17:27, Reply)

omg i did a weejie bord onze...
...& ir wos rilly rilly scary!!!!!!!11111oneonoeonerolfl.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 17:12, Reply)

Blair Witch Bollocks
all you fools who got scared by the Blair Witch Project need your heads checked. (and I'm not exactly the biggest scary film fan)

Mind you I was so stoned that I had to watch with my head on the side and one eye closed to keep me from vomitting because of shaky camera work.

Thought I saw a ghost at Berry Pomeroy castle on a school trip once. Looked like a geezer in a black cloak with hood up walking along the battlements. where there was nothing to walk on.

It could have been a crow though.

How's this for spooky though, I once convinced a friend at uni that Al Capone's real first name was Colin. (i'm quite convincing) Later that day during a game of Trivial Pursuit what question came up? You guessed it, what was Al Capone's first name!

WoOOooOoOoOOoOOoOOoOO!!!!!!!!!!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 16:54, Reply)

ouiji board stuff.....
I'm afraid i do indeed believe in the ghosts etc - not entirely sure what, but i do believe there is a point between life and death that you should not cross. This is why i have never played ouija boards myself, and instead thrive on other people's stories.

This is a bit vague - one of my childhood friend's dad told me this years ago. Apparently, a group of his uni friends all decided to have a go on t'board. They managed to contact someone and were having a nice wee chat.

Anyway, the conversation with said alleged dead person got a bit freaky. One of the female participants asked ' what do you see ?' To which the glass spelt out 'The Devil'. (from reading the posts for this particular QOTW, it seems a pretty standard answer).

So the girl asks 'where do you see it ?' The glass spells out 'the mirror'. (not the newspaper, although i suppose,in retrospect, quite apt)

So the girl went over and took a look in the nearest mirror, turned hysterical, promptly screamed the place down, and had to be sedated and carted off by an ambulance to a psychiatric unit.

My dad has seen quite a few ghosts, so i think that's where i got the interest. During his time in the RAF, one of his beds was haunted by a chap who had slept there previously but committed suicide a few years before. He endured a year or so of having his pillow snatched from under his head and thrown across the room early every morning.

Once you have had a brush with this sort of stuff, you stop needing scientific evidence or proof to back up that what you have seen or experienced is 'real'.

Believing in supernatural phenomena is a choice, but claiming other people are retarded or stupid for doing so is unfair and 'retarded' in itself.
(heartspark, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 16:38, Reply)

When I was young I used to know a number you could dial...
...and then hang up the phone and it would start ringing. Apparently BT used to use it to check the line was working. It changed years ago and no longer works.

Oh sorry. That's next week's QOTW.
(Garnett, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 16:25, Reply)

Unlawful Odour
I thought scientific knowledge *was* thousands of years of learning...
(noir, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 16:02, Reply)

I am evil
When my younger brother was five, he was convinced that there was a monster that lived in the cupboard at the foot of his bed. A horrifyingly real monster. It would growl at him in the night, waking him up, and it would discuss with its monster friends the best way of preparing a five year old boy - fried? boiled? eaten raw off the bone?

It scared him witless.

I know this, because the monster was in fact me and my mate Denzil, speaking through a microphone into a speaker I hid in the bottom drawer. Being five, he never figured out the long cable running out of his room into mine.

But my mom did. Nips.

*pop* etc
( TheFr00n buntz buntz eintz eintz, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 16:02, Reply)