Glad tidingswe bring
to you and your king. We wish you a merry Crimbo and a happy new year.
Have you ever bee arol singing. Was it serious, or post modern ironic?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 20 Dec 2013, 10:17, 18 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

New Years Resolutions
Does anyone actually make them? Do you stick to them?

What are you going to change in your life to make 2014 better than 2013?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 20 Dec 2013, 10:16, 97 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha


yeah
(Sebastian Dried-on excreta bull goose loony, silverback shitposting alpha, Fri 20 Dec 2013, 9:43, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

So how are you spending the last weekend before Christmas?
Dashing around in desperation, buying gifts?
Being forced to spend it with family you don't like?
Getting drunk?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 20 Dec 2013, 8:49, 133 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

shut up
You fucking dicks
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 23:46, 31 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Alroght?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 21:25, 4 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Awkward moments involving texting?
In my first year of Uni, I befriended this girl who I was sort of into for a bit but not to the point where I wanted a relationship with her or anything like that, especially as I was at Uni and could have had plenty of options. Friend zone? Is that the correct term?

Anyway I got the impression she was into me going by the signals, and one day she asked if I wanted to meet up with her, go to town for a bit and then go "chill at her" place. So I was like, damn, is she going to make a move on me? How do I reject her? And I spoke about this situation to a mate.

So then when I meet up with her, she starts telling me about how she's really into this other guy, and how she was upset because he ended up sleeping with one of her flatmates who she'd had an argument with. So I was like, cool, she's obviously into him and not me. So I send my friend a text, something like "She's talking about this guy she likes, pretty good, means I can keep my options open."

Ten minutes later and she says to me "did you send me this?" and showed me the text I thought I'd sent to my friend. Fuck. It went to her, as she was the last person I texted before then so she was at the top of my messages list, and I must have just assumed my other mate was as he usually. Well I could have committed suicide on the spot, it was just too awkward. To be fair she laughed about it, and we basically cleared up that neither of us feel that way about each other. In fact, I'm now living with her in a flat.

Surely some of you have awkward text stories that can top mine?
(SculptureOfMan Mmhmm, this IS a tasty burger!, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 20:20, 41 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

come on you lot, wake up
when did you last have sex? what do you consider a drought?

alt: what's the most valuable quality in a person??

altalt: what's the worst characteristic in a person???
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 15:27, 255 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Christmas songs
What are you favorite Christmas songs?
(Stibbins, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 14:11, 42 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

How about a news thread?
Tulisa says "I didn't do it"

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-25448563

Also, her saying she will have to move after reading out her address. Not likely pet.
Also, describing Mike GLC as a Musician!

Also www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-25448658

What are your thoughts on the artists depiction? *edited because racist*

You terrible racist.

Alt. Alright?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 12:43, 45 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Just listening to radio 6 goox selection of sounds but the dj iz annoying. I ould do a better job.
How could you do a better job than someone else is doing?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 9:46, 96 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Oh, Hi! Good morning, you look *lovely* today (Not you, sorry)
So, right, erm, what are you doing today? I'm enjoying my last FULL day of the year at work. S'alright though innit. I just has a 'Heston' mince pie for breakfast, I don't even like mince pies, at least I though I didn't, but that was okay actually.
Alt: Jason keeps getting all upset. Who is going to upset Jason today? Why does Jason spend nearly all his time getting upset?
^UPSET^
Altalt: If you were going to start a thread, what subjects would you choose? When you have decided, start a new thread containing your answers, or something. I dunno, or care.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 19 Dec 2013, 7:46, 93 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 21:21, Reply)

My favourite Dad's Army themed fish is pike.
What's your favourite sitcom-based fish?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 18:05, 103 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Anyone want a non racist attention seeking thread?
Well I suppose all threads are attention seeking in some way

So in what way are you an exhibitionist (not just being in the nuddy), how do you get attention?

alt: tea anyone?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 15:52, 101 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

One for the yurt prick

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 14:49, 3 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Top trends of 2013
A year in review from the new God (Google)

www.google.com/trends/topcharts

Does this make you feel old, or are you down with the kids (paedo) and have knowledge of all of these?

I am at the age where I am starting to fall behind. I don't do Snapchat, Instagram or "selfies" (well, not that many selfies anyway). I have never Twerked, nor do I intend to. Chart music makes my ears bleed. Kids annoy me. The list goes on.

Alt. I've just got into drinking roobibos tea. What have you got into recently, besides MM?

AltAlt. Too shit? You do better then.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 14:40, 64 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

This one goes out to swipe.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 14:10, 7 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

where did you all go?
gash decision in court this morning just ruined my evening plans. drafting and redrafting it is, bah bloody humbug. what will you be doing?

wtf is the point of that penguin thing?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 13:46, 49 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

B3tans! Jenny Lawrence is fighting your corner!
www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-25427990

Let's talk fat, fatties and banning.

Alt: lunch

Altalt: over there - just over there. Look!
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 12:24, 92 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

NOOT NOOT

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 11:49, 16 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

It's my works Christmas lunch today.
Proper full on catered posh scran. Fuck you all.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 11:20, 49 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

It's nearly Christmas. The season of goodwill to all. So come on in....
Home Sweet Home.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 10:06, 89 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

alright campers
Wednesday! 'Hump day' in the parlance of the 'bent fucking prick'! What does today hold for YOU?

Alt: make up some vile slander about a prominent public figure. Perhaps they 'finger kids' or something. Who knows? You do, that's who!

Alt alt: suggest some creative methods for Battered's suicide. He's clearly a 'man on the edge' and no mistake!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Dec 2013, 8:11, 153 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

What is best in life?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 17 Dec 2013, 23:58, 2 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

alright evening wankers
The question on everyone's lips:

Have you ever met someone in a pub in Kensington and been shocked at how fat they are?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 17 Dec 2013, 19:40, 137 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Moaning cunts
I just wrote to the Beeb, Channel 4 and other outlets about their lack of subtitling on VOD services. Apparently OfCom have no regulations.
I also wrote to The White House and Number 10 about the treatment of LGBT citizens in Russia earlier this year - no response.
Last year I wrote to Rowntrees to complain about lack of Fruit Gums in their Pick n Mix and got vouchers.

What's the last thing you complained about, and did you come to a resolution?

Alt. I'm doing some tandoori chicken tonight, it has been marinated for a day or so. What are you looking forward to tonight?

AltAlt. Take 2 bottles into the shower?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 17 Dec 2013, 17:46, 124 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Do you do anything remotely religious at crimbo,
or just presents, food and booze? If you're a mussie, do you condemn, patronise or not care? A friend is a mussie, he still manages to drink and nom bacon. I guess he ain't that devout.
Alt, weve doscussed crimbo amd easter, any thoughts onnew year?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 17 Dec 2013, 16:48, 42 replies, latest was 11 years ago)