as a vegetarian
and a human being, i find this thread offensive.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:08, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Maybe if you ate some meat your memory would improve.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:10, Reply)

noel
you really know how to put the OUCH in touche.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:11, Reply)

It's why you love me so.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:12, Reply)

it's one of many many reasons

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:13, Reply)

Whaaaaaa, poor little fluffy animals, whaaaaaaaaaa
hippy
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:11, Reply)

i'm an evil high tax paying capitalist corporate soul-sucking pig, remember
i just don't like the sinewy texture or rotten flavour of dead animal in my mouth.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:12, Reply)

if it tastes rotten or the texture is sinewy
then it's either shit meat or has been cooked badly.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:13, Reply)

meat IS shit
it is DEAD, ffs!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:14, Reply)

So is cabbage

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:15, Reply)

maybe but you overlook the inescapable point: cabbage is also shit

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:16, Reply)

you're not one of those stupid vegetarians who doesn't like most vegetables are you?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:17, Reply)

i am a vegetarian precisely because i am so fussy
and not because i have a single principle. so... what do you think?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:19, Reply)

well, at least you admit it
my ex was exactly the same.

do you eat fish?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:21, Reply)

some fish
not seafood. but i like white fish or salmon.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:22, Reply)

interestingly those are the sorts of fish/seafood I like least.
in fact, that wasn't interesting at all
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:23, Reply)

when i was a student, my friend and i were having a hangover lunch in mcdonalds after an epic night/morning's clubbing
i ordered a filet o'fish and she was surprised. the conversation went thusly:

"oh, do you like fish?"

"yes"

"oh. do you like haddock?"

"yes"

"oh. do you like cod?"

"yes"

"oh. do you like plaice?"

"yes"

"oh! do you like-"

"IF YOU DON'T SHUT THE FUCK UP I AM GOING TO RAM THIS FISHY SANDWICH UP YOUR HOOTER."

"oh."
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:26, Reply)

haha

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:27, Reply)

I only put that as i couldn't spell brocolli

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:18, Reply)

and still can't

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:19, Reply)

I know, probably haven't eaten enough meat today

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:21, Reply)

what has that got to do with it?
the texture and taste of meat varies massively, so dismissing it all in one go is ridiculous.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:16, Reply)

no it isn't
in the course of being forced to eat meat as a child, i have eaten: roast beef, roast pork, roast lamb, roast chicken, duck, fillet, sirloin and rump steaks, kidneys, liver, chicken breasts and bacon.

it was all fucking rancid. the liver and kidneys were the worst bit though. it must be 20 years later and i can still taste the fucking things...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:17, Reply)

You need to swallow, not spit

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:20, Reply)

meat dicks i have eaten: roast beef, roast pork, roast lamb, roast chicken, duck, fillet, sirloin and rump steaks, kidneys, liver, chicken breasts and bacon.

it was all fucking rancid. the liver and kidneys were the worst bit though. it must be 20 years later and
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:21, Reply)

kidneys and liver are quite minging
in their natural form.

some of them anyway. Not goose liver marinated in misery though. mmmmm.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:22, Reply)

good
although as a vegetarian you are relegated from the human race and will henceforth be referred to as cattle.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:12, Reply)

i've heard worse

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:14, Reply)

That reminds me, I'm never introducing you to my girlfriend

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:15, Reply)

I already know enough people anyway

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Just as well
I personally think you're awesome and don't want to have to introduce you with the words "This is Vipros, he's not as much of a cunt as his online opinions may have led you, personally, to believe"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:18, Reply)

thanks
I'm less opinionated in real life. Rather, I keep the negative ones to myself more. Except on topics where we can all agree. Like U2 being fucking shit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:20, Reply)

Oh yeah she'd be fine with that
No way would we have made it 9 years otherwise
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:22, Reply)

9 years eh
I take it she isn't interested in marriage, otherwise you would have been dragged down the aisle by now.

rather than forcing other men down the "aisle"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:24, Reply)

6/10 doesn't really work
Marks for inventiveness though. She's not particularly marriage-fixated, no. I'm keener on the idea than she is. I've got her sold on the dress, the day, the party and (obviously) getting to choreograph her own wedding dance rather than other peoples', but not on the cost. As I'm sure you can understand.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:30, Reply)

indeed I can
got a meeting to flesh out the details with the venue next week which will be good.

my mrs has found some shoes as well, which is a weight off all our minds.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:37, Reply)

I imagine this will be the worst part of it, when I eventually persuade her
Waiting for her to choose everything. Glad to hear things are moving ahead, sir
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:40, Reply)

we are lucky in that we have the same opinion on a lot of matters
it has made decorating our house and organising our wedding very much easier.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:53, Reply)

possibly relevant
and yes, I know it ain't links ...
BTW, apologies if this has been posted before
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:14, Reply)

i never click links because of AA and his bunny-porn
but it would actually have been a very funny place to put "i love horses". i hope you did.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 14:15, Reply)

Haha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 1 Mar 2011, 15:03, Reply)