When b3ta and real life don't mix.
I've just read a friends status update "Anyone know any remedies for an eye twitch?"
I almost responded "Murder."

Tell me your tales.
alt: most of you have probably fucked off for the day, so, if you haven't list your favorite cocktails
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:06, 81 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm always just about stopping myself
from making a joke that only B3Tards would get.

alt: My friend made one once called a steel butterfly, it was yum.

good evening
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:10, Reply)

ooooooooooh that sounds like an awesome drink
any idea what was in it?

Alright Professor Hottystein
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:11, Reply)

um, it was white and alcoholic
Having googled it, I can only find one reference which doesn't sound exactly like it, but butterscotch schnapps rings a bell

edit: actually, maybe it was this www.cocktailmaking.co.uk/displaycocktail.php/2561-Iron-Butterfly
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:15, Reply)

I but it's lush
but BET
ffs hands
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:34, Reply)

I almost replied
'Lord Prayer Wank' on Vipros's status. Changed it last moment to LPW to preserve innocence. It happens quite a lot.

Alt: we'd be here all night if I listed my favourite cocktails
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:19, Reply)

I have to regularly censor stuff I write on Facebook.
Stupid thing can't post status updates to lists, doh. Alright you?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:26, Reply)

I'm okay thanks
how about you?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:29, Reply)

I'm dandy, it's Friday and my good mate's coming over for a joint and some chess.
Woo! Got anything planned this weekend?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:35, Reply)

Sadly just work
and maybe a quick outing on Friday. Sounds like a plan you've got :)
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:52, Reply)

Add 18.5 miles on foot tomorrow and maybe another five or six hilly ones on Sunday and you've got yourself one worn-out me.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:56, Reply)

out of curiosity
why? do you have younguns on your friends list or work or summat?
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:30, Reply)

Yeah, younguns and responsible adults
many of whom wouldn't appreciate my somewhat adult sense of humour if let loose. I could just delete them but there's quite a few locals I like to keep up with. I have to be slightly more reserved in certain company in real life too, s'just the way it is.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:34, Reply)

i were just asking
nosy ent i
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:35, Reply)

Ask me anything you like.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:36, Reply)

i did

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:37, Reply)

I'm pleased I satisfied your curiosity.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:38, Reply)

I've got a few hours to spare :D
I think the only ones I really like are sloe gin fizzes and pomegranate martinis
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:26, Reply)

OOOOOH mum dropped off a bottle of sloe gin for me today.
I picked about a kilo of sloes when we stopped for lunch during a walk in December and it's been steeping since. I might just have a peck now, mmmmmm.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:29, Reply)

yay sloe gin
I'm not usually a gin drinker, but it seems to be an OT thing
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:30, Reply)

It's properly fucking good.
Like a liqueur, wicked.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:32, Reply)

I like lots of classic ones
like Long Island Iced Tea and White Russians, and cocktails based on martini recipes are always good. I also like creamy ones like Shaft (obvious strikethrough there) and champagne/ vodka based ones
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:31, Reply)

I'm not a big liquor drinker, but champagne is up there
I like to mix wine and cheap champagne.
Verdi spumante and Alice White Red Lexia is a new favorite.
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:36, Reply)

ah, that's what that meant
don't worry about posting that sort of stuff on my status
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Sat 12 Mar 2011, 0:44, Reply)

some men i work with cringe when i say cunt
london innit, its an affectionate term.

and margarita baby, all the way
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:30, Reply)

you're the one that's got one
so you should be the one allowed to say it
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:31, Reply)

its all words professor crunchenstein
although im not a fan of clunge. or norks. because norks is for fucking gaybo cockends
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:34, Reply)

I fucking love this!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:58, Reply)

it's a term that is loathed here and saved for only the most devilish of women

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:33, Reply)

haha
devilish. i like that
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:34, Reply)

it's all srsbzns here with "cunt" rosalala
thems fightin' words
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:39, Reply)

they need learning krisalicious

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:43, Reply)

I'm not sure I could single handedly take on that responsibility

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:57, Reply)

two hands girl, two hands

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:05, Reply)

you best just come over here so we can have a laugh and call eachother cunts
then people will be all "oh look at those two young girls who are super hawt and awesome totally okay with calling eachother cunt, we can do it too"
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:19, Reply)

oh ok im in
lemme just hit the old man up for a few quid
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:28, Reply)

OK going to be really boring here (what's new?)
I have no food in the kitchen (well very little) so I need to go to the shops. What should I get for tea?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:34, Reply)

Cornetto.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:36, Reply)

a great fucking fat lamb donner mixed chicken shish with no salad extra chilli sauce
boss
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:38, Reply)

this is shaping up to be a healthy and satisfying tea

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:38, Reply)

get involved

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:43, Reply)

Here's one for you....
- 'Very Lazy' chilli
- 'Very Lazy' Garlic
- Bit of Pasta
- Some sort of prawn/crab-sticks/crab/crayfish/whatever
- Bottle of white
- Single creme (about 300ml) & Chives or Parsley (optional)

... same deal as that thing I showed you before with a teaspoon of the chilli and two teaspoons of that garlic. Plonk in about 3/4 of a glass of white, let it reduce down to barely anything, plonk in the prawns and the cremefresh/chives, let it reduce a bit more so it goes thicker....and stir through some pasta.

The saucy bit will be done by the time the pasta is boiled.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:49, Reply)

here fuck orf with your cooking
and your making shit
with effort and that
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:57, Reply)

but it looks lush
if I make it to that side of the world I hope restaurant gonz will be open for business
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 18:58, Reply)

fuck that mush
id whisk you off for a few at the spoons before chowing down at ponders end kebabby for a sweet one mixed with chips and a chat from the boys behind the till
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:02, Reply)

I have no idea what you said but it sounds AWESOME

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:03, Reply)

its a DATE

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:04, Reply)

I'll even wear my hottie shoes that make me look like Shaq

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:18, Reply)

<translate>
Never mind, dear. I'll take you for a few beverages at my local before enjoying a meat-and-salad pitta and fries and perhaps there'll be some flirting.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:06, Reply)

salad?
fuck orf
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:08, Reply)

hahahaha figured as much

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:17, Reply)

Hah, that ain't effort in the slightest, plus it'll do you for lunch the next day.

( G/PP &#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128169;&#128, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:08, Reply)

aww man, i just got back
perhaps I will make this some other time
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:35, Reply)

I nearly wrote the word grinning like a mong on Beeker's girlfriend's wall.
She's a social worker and I don't think it would have gone down well. I wrote special needs instead.
( girlinthehole, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:12, Reply)

oof
cringing across the sea
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:16, Reply)

I do this all the time at work
I only know I've gone too far when people stop laughing and start giving me disgusted looks.

There's a cocktail bar back home which does one called 'um bongo' which is AMAZING. Well, it tastes like um bongo and gets you hammered, anyway. Failing that most stuff with Chambord and/or bits of fruit in. Wherever the place was we ended up in Oxford had some lush cocktails as well.

EDIT - oo oo I've just remembered the same place do one that tastes like a wham bar, and has wham sweeties in the top. A cocktail that tastes like a wham bar!
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:17, Reply)

my friends favorite drink is something called nuts and berries, has chambord and cream and something else in, she loves it

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:28, Reply)

Sounds good to me!
*rummages on booze shelf*
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:37, Reply)

internet says chambord, frangelico and cream
FUCKING FRANGELICO
soooooooo forgot you existed my love *sigh*
chocolate caaaaaaaaake shots mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:42, Reply)

I've got a litre of that on my booze shelf
it was the equivalent of about $16 in Spain. It's nearly twice that here.
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:48, Reply)

sugar rim a shot glass and a lemon slice, pour half straight vodka and half frangelico
bite into the sugared lemon then take the shot
so omfg good
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:51, Reply)

The next time I have vodka
I will definitely try this. I made hazelnut chocolate ice cream the other day that had a hefty shot of frangelico in, and my god, I nearly wet my knickers. I've had sex which wasn't as fun as eating that stuff was.
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:55, Reply)

omfg IRL LOL
that's so fucking fantastic
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:57, Reply)

THEY DO NOT DRINK IT IN THE CONGO
alright?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:36, Reply)

I don't care where they drink it
it's a bloody marvellous cocktail.
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:37, Reply)

want some
although I had the forethought to buy wine in the shop so I have wine
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:38, Reply)

I've got ziiiiider and cheesecake in the fridge
this is going to comprise the entirety of my evening meal. I must go out for a run first though.
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:43, Reply)

surely cheesecake first
the sugar rush will help you run
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:43, Reply)

pfft

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:44, Reply)

I could totally have gone for a run after
those pancakes last night. But it was dark and scary outside
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:45, Reply)

I have, erm, sampled it
because I need energy to run. Obviously.
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:47, Reply)

wham!
wouldn't it be awesome if it had popping candy in it too?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:41, Reply)

I think it's the only thing I miss about Preston, to be honest
it's a great cocktail place. There's a really good one in town here but it doesn't have such interesting things on the menu.
(berk, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:43, Reply)

I'm not really a cocktail sort of woman.
I had a pinacolada in Tenerife. It was nice.
( girlinthehole, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:21, Reply)

what sort of woman are you then?

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:28, Reply)

tail
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:45, Reply)

wrong one

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:45, Reply)

Not in my brain dear.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:51, Reply)

no tail?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:53, Reply)

to be fair, I haven't gotten any in a while :(

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:54, Reply)

She's a cock kinda women innit.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:57, Reply)

was thinking more league of gentlemen
also, youtube disco, kids!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 11 Mar 2011, 19:58, Reply)