Worse than that.
My body decides to scare the life out of me by refusing to let me ride the cotton pony for nearly three months, then yesterday, *BAM*. No proper sexehtiemz this weekend now :(
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:06, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

One up the bum
No harm done, eh Darth?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Not any more
It's like waving a wand in Hogwarts nowadays
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:13, Reply)

good imagery

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:15, Reply)

Cheers
Has its drawbacks though. Shat myself the other day, didn't even notice until I sat down
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:21, Reply)

4/10

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Hang about
What the FUCK just happened?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:27, Reply)

OMG

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:30, Reply)

Well, you weren't going to mark yourself.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:35, Reply)

He's done more than mark himself.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:56, Reply)

5/10

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:59, Reply)

It was only a 4/10

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:38, Reply)

Oh bollocks
At least you know you're not up the duff... *scrapes barrel of potential silver linings*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:14, Reply)

I knew that already.
I really would not wait three months to ascertain that that was not the case.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Yeah I didn't think that was likely
I was just trying to think of ways to cheer you up. You'll be even more pent-up and frustrated tomorrow so can get some really good venting going on...
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:23, Reply)

why the cunting blue fuck
would anyone want to announce to a load of randoms on the internet, most of whom are male, that their retarded uterus had woken up just in time to release 3 months of manky blackberry clottage on poor unfortunate unsuspecting london?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:28, Reply)

because they would appreciate that no one cares

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:29, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1132564

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1131036

What's the matter, Swipey? Did you have to touch a commoner on your way to being VERY IMPORTANT today?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:31, Reply)

*gently steers the pair of you towards a paddling pool full of mud*

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:49, Reply)

*sets up the slow-mo camera*

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:51, Reply)

mud is good for one's skin
thanks vips
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:53, Reply)

mud blood
CARRIE!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Second click of the day
for "blackberry clottage". Lovely
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:37, Reply)

If I have to read about sport then they can read about my uterus.

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:38, Reply)

Is there a match on up there tomorrow too?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Urgh, and I'm well pissed off at myself.
In my head I was all *simpering girl voice* "Oh well, at least I get to spend some time with him". YUCK.

Aye, I'll probably end up headbutting a copper before the day is out.

I'm in a fair good mood though, getting excited now :)
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:28, Reply)

Good to hear (the last part)
Headbutting a copper may be tricky unless you get a co-operative one who doesn't mind holding still while you set up your stepladder.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:38, Reply)

Heyyyy
I'm not *that* short!

Plus, I suspect someone will give me a foot-up. It's brilliant anyway, I hadn't told my dad why I was going down - he really is quite staggeringly right wing sometimes, but I finally told him last night and he was really supportive of the whole thing. I had expected him to do a Monty.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:45, Reply)

That's fucking brilliant
Can Yorkshiremen be right-wing now? Very pleased for you hon
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:47, Reply)

He does his best!
I was worried he wouldn't give me the time off work :)
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:54, Reply)

I forgot he was your boss
How remiss of me. When are you back?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:56, Reply)

Sunday, only going overnight.
Just doing all my final planning now.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:57, Reply)

No offence, but if you get in the way of me driving to Cambridgeshire for the weekend i will run you over

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:59, Reply)

I thought you were having an extra night with BB?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:00, Reply)

I am
The original plan was to go back Saturday night - so no nights in That London.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Misapprehension on my part
Bad Darth Foxtrot. I expect excellent tales of your weekend on Monday.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:06, Reply)

I shall file a report in due course.
I can't decide what to wear :(
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:12, Reply)

I absolutely did not see that coming

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Shut up.
I meant from a practical AND sexy point of view. I need clothes that are suitable to be kettled in, if that happens, and layers. I also need them to not be too distinctive, just in case. I need to find a plain scarf in case they decide to go CS-happy again. And there's a group I'm aligned with that are wearing green and purple, so if I could find some things in those colours, I'd be happy. I don't think I have anything that fits all those criteria though.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:20, Reply)

This is not something I can say to many of my friends, as you may have assumed
but you think too much.

Kidding - very glad you're taking all practical issues into consideration
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:23, Reply)

You expected him to
not actually give a flying shit but assume a position opposite to yours anyway, merely to watch you splutter indignantly like an ill-informed student, and all simply for his own childish amusement?

Nice work, Dad.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 9:59, Reply)

*checks*
No, my dad knows I'm capable of engaging in debate without resorting to 'spluttering like an ill-informed student'.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:04, Reply)

You should try that on here, then.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:11, Reply)