I am not a stalker.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:45, 137 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Does that cover both IRL and OL stalking?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:48, Reply)

Yes.
Yes it does.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:49, Reply)

jolly good.
So how do you spend your time then?
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:51, Reply)

Writing feverish fanmail to a certain BBC newsreader and Antiques Roadshow presenter.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:54, Reply)

erotic or just intense?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:55, Reply)

Both.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:57, Reply)

signed in blood I assume?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:01, Reply)

She's very, very thin in real life
But she does have a quite twisted sense of humour in real life.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:56, Reply)

You know La Bruce irl?
Blimey.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:56, Reply)

No, she hosted an awards do I went to some years ago.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:29, Reply)

That's exactly what a stalker would say.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:49, Reply)

This is a somewhat random statement.
Or have I missed something?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:50, Reply)

is this a decision after some stalking efforts failed?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:51, Reply)

Well, we can't all be, now can we?

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:52, Reply)

Only a stalker can stalk another stalker
would make a good tagline for a straight to DVD film
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:53, Reply)

h to the izzo v to the izzay fo shizzle my nizzle used to dribble down in va

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 18:59, Reply)

pardon?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:01, Reply)

jiggah
what's my mothah fucken name
jiggah
and whom i rollin' wit, huh
my niggahs
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:03, Reply)

fair enough.
So what are you up top this weekend, other than rolling with your niggahs
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:04, Reply)

not fucking much
apparently they're all planning a massive trip to the wine fest :((((

you?
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:06, Reply)

Im going hiking in the peak district

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:15, Reply)

oh ho ho well check you out

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:18, Reply)

Yes I enjoy a good hike
especially in a national park
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:20, Reply)

H to the izz-o, V to the izz-ay, that's the anthem, getya damn hands up, H to the izz-o, V to the izz-ay, not guilty, ya'll gotsta feel me, H to the izz-o, V to the izz-ay, that's the anthem, getya damn hands up

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:06, Reply)

i like a bit of hove now and then but i really quite love luda

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:09, Reply)

Hmmm, a little too vulgar for my taste if I'm honest.
I'm more hip hop than the rap. Talib, Mos Def, J5, Blackalicious etc.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:16, Reply)

I can honestly say I've never heard of J5 or Blackalicious
And I've never specifically listened to Talib or Mos Def, I may have heard their music but I wouldn't know it off hand
Mos Def is a smashing actor though

I think Eminem is more vulgar than Luda. I first liked D12 when they came out but then when I actually listened to the lyrics I just couldn't justify enjoying a song about raping a grandmother.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:21, Reply)

Nup, me either.
I liked Em's first couple of albums but he's just thrived on being an angry vicious uncaring disenfranchised white kid and it totally doesn't work for me. I'd wholeheartedly recommend Talib Kweli's back catalogue; he's worked with every rapper and producer worth anything and is pure hip hop. Same goes for Mos Def who I find a bit hit-and-miss but I think that's mainly due to the sheer volume of stuff he's put out.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:26, Reply)

Try deltron 3000 and scarface
Both brilliant
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:36, Reply)

Jurassic 5 are great! Good freestylers as well check them out

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:39, Reply)

are they anything like N-Dubz?
I QUITE FUCKING LOVE N-DUBZ!
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:43, Reply)

really?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:46, Reply)

shit yeah
I really really do.
But I was joking by asking if they were like N-Dubz.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:55, Reply)

I'm not meant to have voted today am I?
if not, when?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:28, Reply)

In May I imagine
Around the 5th usually.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:30, Reply)

1st thursday of the month

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:31, Reply)

No, that's the monthly Hang Up The Sheep To Dry day.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:33, Reply)

I missed the last one
and my sheep are still wringing wet
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:35, Reply)

See! If you don't watch out they'll go all musty on you.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:43, Reply)

So wet sheep are a serious problem then?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:44, Reply)

Well yes
I told you, that's what the shackles in my "store room" are for.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:47, Reply)

You said
but Im' still weary. Even though I am poor farmhand material
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:51, Reply)

Sheep skin rugs are impossible to clean

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:41, Reply)

That's where you're going wrong - keep them ON the sheep. Works a treat.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:44, Reply)

This was honestly about 90% guess
With maybe 10% added guess.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:33, Reply)

5th of may

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:30, Reply)

OK, and that's that whole
'making voting better' thing, right? Is there something else I'm meant to care about, too, or just that?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:34, Reply)

some local elections
and the Scottish and Welsh parliamentary elections
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:36, Reply)

ah, I am in Wales
I should probably look into that
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:38, Reply)

probably

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:39, Reply)

Nah, englands the best peoples to rule you, stay at home and have a cup of tea
Evening!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:40, Reply)

evening!
I am English, so I am corrupting the country from the inside
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:12, Reply)

Then why are you in the tree outside my house?
Evening team!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:35, Reply)

*team high fives*
what's on the agenda this evening?!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:39, Reply)

Nadda, just had gammon, egg and CURLY FRIES!
I had a ferret but I've drunk it now :(
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:41, Reply)

those guys are bitey

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:42, Reply)

And smelly when on heat

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:43, Reply)

That's not what the restraining order says

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:38, Reply)

Evening Amberls
How's Brizzle?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:43, Reply)

Quite nice thanks
bit boring. How are you?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:48, Reply)

Bit bored
As I usually am in the evenings, but looking to do some volunteer design work to fill some time. How badly could it go, as long as no-one's permanently injured?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:50, Reply)

Are you going to the small bristol bash?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:52, Reply)

What small Bristol bash?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:53, Reply)

here you go
b3ta.com/calendar/event/23359
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:57, Reply)

Aha, I see
But no, probably not. I do know exactly where the pub is though.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:59, Reply)

Apart from you, I don't know any of those people.
And Bristol is big and scary. I vote for a west country bash in WsM. We could ride the wheel and walk along the pier and shizzle.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:01, Reply)

It's also ridiculously hilly

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:06, Reply)

and silly

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:10, Reply)

Grey squirrels: should you shoot them?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:41, Reply)

D:
no!
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:42, Reply)

An American would say that

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:42, Reply)

what the...i don't even...
wouldn't you think americans would say yes you should since we all own guns and everything
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:56, Reply)

In the UK we have two main kinds of squirrel
the Grey and the Red. The red is native to the UK, and now endangered as someone thought it would be a good Idea to introduce the north American grey squirrel to the ecosystem.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:58, Reply)

well why are they endangered? because you all hate gingers?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:04, Reply)

Because the grey squirrel carries immunity to diseases
allowing it to infect the native population without consequence
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:09, Reply)

that makes no fucking sense to me

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:11, Reply)

Grey squirrels carry diseases that kill the red squirrels

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:13, Reply)

And the red squirrels are far superior

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:40, Reply)

Because grey squirrels are mean and evil and come from America
They killed all our lovely refined red squirrels, innit? They used to sit there in their trees drinking earl grey tea and nibbling on cucumber sandwiches, with their cute pointy ears all sticking up and tufty. And those pesky grey squirrels came over here, stealing all their jobs.

No, wait, that Darkies and Polish. As you were.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:58, Reply)

It works both ways
The European starling effectively wiped out a range of native American birds when it was introduced to their ecological niche.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:00, Reply)

Take THAT Americans

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:00, Reply)

the worst case is Australia
any flora and fauna brought to there seems to kill off all the local stuff.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:02, Reply)

this makes me do a sad

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:03, Reply)

Don't worry
I don't hate all Americans. Just a lot.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:05, Reply)

I know some absolutely lovely americans
In fact, all the ones I know personally are jolly nice.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:07, Reply)

Is that because you shun the idiots?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:09, Reply)

idiots have a habit of seeking me out

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:16, Reply)

being 1/4 Native American and 3/4 regular American, I feel a little oppressed here

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:18, Reply)

what 1/4?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:19, Reply)

Half of one grandparent
And a quarter of two others.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:26, Reply)

my left leg and half of my vagina

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:33, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:38, Reply)

GAWD
thank you, I was like, does no one find that funny?
I know I'm shit at jokes but that was a bit funny
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:47, Reply)

i found it funny too
I totally clicked it and everything
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:17, Reply)

oh my *blushes* well thank you

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:21, Reply)

no

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:42, Reply)

No you can replace them with black squirrels

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:44, Reply)

Only if you don't mind spitting the lead shot out
In some circles it's seen as impolite.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:45, Reply)

You don't swallow?
You're a country girl. Have you shot them before?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:47, Reply)

Good god, no
I have this ridiculous dislike of killing things. Doesn't stop me from eating meat or from skinning and all that but couldn't kill it myself.

Well, I suppose if it shat on my washing I might.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:53, Reply)

What if the thing you're shooting is vermin?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:56, Reply)

Well then it's probably done its business on my washing
I love that phrase - done its business
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:04, Reply)

I saw it there, dealing drugs with its friend
Honest, not a word of a lie.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:05, Reply)

Right, hand me the twelve bore
What-ho!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:10, Reply)

That's the spirit

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:18, Reply)

I have eaten chocolate chip cookies
I am now drinking a gert cup of tea.

I know how to live, me!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:55, Reply)

YOU'RE SO AWESOME!
A'right b3th?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:56, Reply)

I am, thank you
Awesome and full of yummy goodness.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 19:59, Reply)

Aw man
I really want some yummy goodness now, but have none here. Boo.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:00, Reply)

haha sucks to be you right now


or something a little more sympathetic.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:02, Reply)

On the plus side, it shall stop me becoming one of those fatties I've read so much about

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:06, Reply)

I used to be one of them
and I appear to be working my way back to being one.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:08, Reply)

Woo, cookie fatty!

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:09, Reply)

Now im hungry for buiscuits

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:14, Reply)

i had TWO cups of tea
but no cookies :(
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:10, Reply)

Mine is in a pint mug
so it probably counts as two.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:13, Reply)

I don't like those so much
it's always too cold by the time you get to the bottom
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:13, Reply)

Methinks you doth protest too much.

( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:31, Reply)

It's all the accusations.
Most recently FROM YOU.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:36, Reply)

Just telling it like I see it Dizzle.

( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:37, Reply)

You are seeing it wrong, Bizzle.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:39, Reply)

Denial is not just a river in Egypt.

( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:40, Reply)

I know not what you speak of.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:41, Reply)

b3ta.com/search/answers?q=fiona+bruce
( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:50, Reply)

Hahaha, proper owned.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:02, Reply)

I, um, er, I don't, ah, um.
It's not what it looks like.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:06, Reply)

I want to see AC/DC
again.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:34, Reply)

Then do so.

( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:37, Reply)

Do you like them?
hmv.com/hmvweb/navigate.do?pPageID=5321
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:42, Reply)

I do like them but not enough to travel to London to see them.

( girlinthehole, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:47, Reply)

Don't get tickets if you're overdrawn.
Wait until you're back in (the) black.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:41, Reply)

Is this why everyone tells you to fuck off?
If so, you've got Big Balls.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:42, Reply)

I used to get really upset at the abuse.
In fact, it shook me, all night long.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 20:43, Reply)

Just drink a whole lotta (Old) Rosie

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:19, Reply)

I might just have an Angus burger.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:23, Reply)

Don't cook it too long
it'll be Hard As A Rock.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:25, Reply)

And I'll be thunderstruck.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 21:34, Reply)