As a general rule, how far would you go on a first date?
Believe it or not I'm quite shy and would actually struggle to get out of the door to attend a date, let alone get my shimmy on.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:03, 94 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

not sure
any dates I've had have been a bit weird in that I wasn't really aware I was on a date at the time.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:15, Reply)

Did you get lucky or someone set you up with the pretence of steak but really there was an ugly chick waiting at the bar for the guy in the purple cravat?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:16, Reply)

this has made me laugh

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:17, Reply)

we went out as a group
everyone else scurried off into the undergrowth and left us alone for the rest of the night. Ambushed I tells ya!
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:20, Reply)

I got absolutely nowhere on the dates I've been on.
Because the first one we went and watched Snakes on a Plane and it was lame.
Then the next, the date texted someone and told them I was a retard.
So I decided dates r dumb.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:15, Reply)

The guy who sent that text.
You should have totally run him over. With your wheelchair
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:17, Reply)

kicked a shoe at them

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:20, Reply)

Like a proper Yankee Deacon!
Yee-Haa!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:21, Reply)

I agree, dates are shit.
I've fallen into whatever relationships I've had, but the dates I've been on have been shit. For example, I spent the majority of the last date (and the only one for ten years I might add) annoyed about a little glob of mascara in the corner of her eye. It attracted my attention and I couldn't even hold a conversation for the gritting of my teeth. Perhaps it's safer for the world in general that I'm out of the dating game now.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:18, Reply)

sounds like it might be safer
I find it hard to watch porn because I'll see something I hate and then I just focus on that and then I have to completely stop watching because it's pissing me off
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:31, Reply)

I see something that turns me off occasionally
but luckily I'm a man, and that feeling lasts all of fourteen seconds before something slightly more erotic comes along.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:36, Reply)

I haven't been on a date in too long
and thus am unable to answer
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:21, Reply)

I've not really dated.
/ac

A date is usually with someone you don't know that well? Unless you're a bit established... In that case, not far at all.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:23, Reply)

I'm sensing a theme here.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:24, Reply)

ACTUALLY theoretically ok then, you're going on a date and you really click with the guy/girl you're with.
HOW FAR DO YOU GO?!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:24, Reply)

marriage counseling

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:26, Reply)

irl lol

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:26, Reply)

What's third base?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:26, Reply)

Used to be hand-to-genital
think it's more oral nowadays I think.


EDIT: Oh lol en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baseball_metaphors_for_sex
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:27, Reply)

ORAL IS MORAL
apparently
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:30, Reply)

I can't believe someone would think anal was abstinence.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:50, Reply)

for realz
SEX IS SEX PEOPLE
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:54, Reply)

Oral isn't "virginity losing"
but anal pretty much is. You don't talk about losing your blowjob virginity, but you do your anal virginity...
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:58, Reply)

I didn't say that it was.
I read it in a magazine, some big psychologist said it's still considered sex.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:05, Reply)

Christ, second base has moved on a long way in my time
even though baseball rules have remained relatively stable.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:30, Reply)

Second base most often refers to stimulation of a woman's breasts, either through clothing or directly skin to skin
Or as it's called locally...

'Cloth tits' or for the latter, 'Inside tops'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:32, Reply)

fabric fucking

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:39, Reply)

THAT is second base?
Seems so personal.

I always find it hard to gauge what men want, once I went on a trip with a guy and when we got back he was all "I wish you hadn't acted so slutty" because I didn't know he wanted pecks instead of full on make out sessions sometimes.
Men are stupid.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:42, Reply)

He was gay.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:42, Reply)

Men might be stupid.
But women wear make-up and perfume because they're ugly and they smell.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:43, Reply)

isn't that the same reason men grow beards and wear deoderant?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:53, Reply)

Men grow beards because they're fucking awesome.
But yeah, the deoderant's for the honk.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:56, Reply)

no, they grow them to hide their ugly faces

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:05, Reply)

why?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:28, Reply)

I might get there

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:30, Reply)

Isn't it, like, heavy petting, non-penetrative stuff?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:30, Reply)

Also.
No bombing or running.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:30, Reply)

pff!
80s swimming lols
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:32, Reply)

Yay!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:33, Reply)

we wanted a copy of this sign for the darkroom
to dissuade students from snogging in the dark
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:33, Reply)

I'm sure I linked it for you a while back.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:34, Reply)

yeah, but it was low res

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:38, Reply)

It was the 80s
Everything was low res back then.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:39, Reply)

and definitely no horseplay in the shallow end

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:32, Reply)

Depends
If I met a girl on the Monday, I'd probably take her for a drink on Tuesday. I'd like to think we'd be making love by Wednesday and again on Thursday, Friday and Saturday.

But I like to chill on a Sunday.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:30, Reply)

I'd love to tell you to leave the internet
but "Do a Craig David on Sunday" is in my vocabulary.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:32, Reply)

Is that when you trim your beard so it's as neat as a porn-stars pubes?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:33, Reply)

No, I like my porn stars with a bit of bush.
It's a synonym for "chill".
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:34, Reply)

I've been on 3 dates
and been stood up for another

I've not even kissed anyone on a first date. I am proper nervous with these things
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:26, Reply)

I have no qualms whatsoever
with going as far as you can go on a first date.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:29, Reply)

Does this not mean dodgy kicking-out moments or awkward wakeups or dog-breath snogs the next day?
I've no idea how this works unless you're the king of fucking.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:41, Reply)

Not so far as I've noticed.
Whyever would it be awkward?

Edit: I'm not the king of fucking. At best maybe a baronet or other non-hereditary peer.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:49, Reply)

You must be kidding.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:53, Reply)

you think he's not even that good?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:53, Reply)

About which part?
OK, you got me, I'm not even baronet material. I'm a commoner, a serf, a peasant, I'm barely justified in having a penis. Happy now?
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:54, Reply)

you are the amoeba of sex
and they don't even HAVE SEX!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:56, Reply)

It's true, it's true
I reproduce by binary fission :(
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:57, Reply)

You cannot conceive that it can be awkward after sex?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:57, Reply)

Only if you let it.

( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:58, Reply)

What if it were a mistake?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:00, Reply)

How can you mistakenly have sex with someone?
If I didn't want to do them, I wouldn't be in bed with them.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:00, Reply)

I suspect alcohol
and nefarious schemes.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:08, Reply)

Honestly, by the time it's got around to meeting up for an official "date"
I've already decided if I'm alright with sleeping with them or not. What's the point in going on one if you aren't open to it?

Basically, I'm everything that women hate about men.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:07, Reply)

to be fair, they're the ones that get the most nookie, amirite?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:57, Reply)

It's about time for me to have a mid life crisis
any suggestions?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:48, Reply)

Motorbike.
It's usually a motorbike. Get a motorbike.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:49, Reply)

I think I'd fall off
plus I'd look terrible in leather trousers
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:54, Reply)

Oh I know how to have a mid life crisis.
All you do is this.

You start pursuing men who are too young for you, or who are otherwise unsuitable. Then you start to worry that your career isn't what it should be, so you retrain for a bit, qualify as something but that piece of paper isn't worth shit. So, with your 18 year old boyfriend, you start drinking alchopops and listening to shitty R&B music and you wake up in the middle of the night to have a little cry because you haven't had and are unlikely to have a baby.

So I hear, that's how to have a mid life crisis. My friend told me.
(Catomiagi is in with a chance, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:30, Reply)

Depends how well it went.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 5 May 2011, 20:51, Reply)

Alright Noel
to answer your hypothetical question, a kiss at the end of the night if I want to see them again.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:09, Reply)

but isn't that scary
in case you go for the kiss and they dodge?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:35, Reply)

you have to grab them by their ears to keep them still

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:36, Reply)

*takes notes*

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:03, Reply)

I would need somewhere nice to take them back to
in order to feel comfortable going beyond snogging.

Which means I can twist the question round to ask my question, as I've boiled my search down to 2 flats and I'm torn between them.

Both are furnished; one is right by the train station I'd need to commute and has parking, the other is 6-8 minutes walk away and doesn't. The former has better interior design (by John Rocha, and I love his clothes), the latter is larger and has a whole extra room (with no windows, so storage or office or crash space for guests). The first is a shiny newish development, the latter a gorgeous old building that's been turned into apartments.

Argh. Which should I pick?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:39, Reply)

Are the flat advertised online
If the are, why not post a link.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:45, Reply)

the bigger one
always
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:47, Reply)

go for the newer one
old buildings are lovely but they're hassle.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 5 May 2011, 21:55, Reply)

Oooh! I know Lighty.
Post a question asking the good people of OT to offer an opinion, and then FUCK OFF WITHOUT TELLING US WHAT YOU'VE DECIDED.

I might be a tad tired this evening
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:02, Reply)

I was asking people whose opinions matter to me
but look, I'm back now!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:24, Reply)

The first one
the second is further away from where you need to be and the extra room sounds like you aren't really going to use it for anything you need. The rest is just guff.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:04, Reply)

Here they are
(sorry Jeff)

First: www.rentright.co.uk/west-midlands/birmingham/269765_property.aspx

Second: www.maguirejackson.com/flats-rent-birmingham/shopexd.asp?id=39781
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:09, Reply)

You've gone wrong there, LiT
They're both in the Midlands.
( Kroney, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:11, Reply)

Zing!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:13, Reply)

Do suggest a better place
for commuting to my Midlands job...
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:20, Reply)

Having looked at both of them, I'd say.
Get neither. They are both in Brum. Move somewhere good.

Proper answer, go with the first one, it'll be a much easier life
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:13, Reply)

Fuck me, they're expensive.
As far as buildings go, I like the second one better. What are the neighbours like in each one?
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:13, Reply)

The first one is a big complex and I'm facing into the inner courtyard
it was pretty quiet in the building when I visited.
The second is next door to some offices (good) and a Greek restaurant (bad) and that's next door to a chavvy nightclub. But again, I'd be at the rear of the building so I'd have lovely views of an alley.

I've pretty much settled on the first one. I was all ready to get the second last week but I saw the first tonight and it bowled me over. I was a bit worried that it was NewShiny syndrome but I don't think so.

Phoning tomorrow!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:17, Reply)

Wait a few days before phoning about the first one.
John Rocha Debenhams must be due a blue-cross sale soon. You might save 20%
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:19, Reply)

I love his clothes
he's fat, old and has long hair - no wonder his stuff looks good on me.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:21, Reply)

What offer are you going to make?
I assume you won't be going in at the asking price.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:22, Reply)

I'm going to try and get it knocked down to £600/month
but I'll probably cave the moment they say no.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:25, Reply)

Worth making an offer.
Nothing ventured nothing gained and all that sort of thing.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:32, Reply)

The furthest i've gone on a first date
was taking a girls virginity 90 minutes after first meeting her. I wouldn't recommend it. It depends if you want it to last. A one off? Go for a shag. Want more, a kiss, a gentlemanly one at that.
( Peej, Thu 5 May 2011, 22:17, Reply)