This week can fuck right off.
Some cunt in the pub last night was threatening me, so I ended up leaving, as it was either that or there'd be a kick off, and that's not something I want to do. I got home, prepared 2 large cottage pies, then fell asleep while they were in the oven, so they're completely ruined. Alright, so the second one was my fault, but I'm still pissed off about it!

ARGH!

So, what's made you angry this week?

Alt: What's cheered you up this week?

Sorry Duke, but I don't want to talk about banks this morning
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:38, 109 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Angry? Nothing.
Cheered me up? Well.... I saw a friend I've not seen in a long time on Monday and that was lovely. And I got a new sparkly nosestud.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:41, Reply)

Cheered me up?
I love the way my daughter smiles at me in the morning. It's the most heart-warming sight I've ever seen.

(Edit)
Awaiting the paedo jokes. Don't care.
(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:45, Reply)

My friend has just become a Dad, and won't stop gushing about how sweet his daughter is.
It's nice, but a little sickening at the same time.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:47, Reply)

It's hard to stop, but what the fuck
It probably is the single best episode of anyone's life, and for dads lacks all the labour pain and post-natal depression. Only thing you can take do is go out and get him drunk - there won't be much more of that allowed.
(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:51, Reply)

Well, I'm hoping to see him this weekend, but I'm not sure if that'll happen!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:52, Reply)

I'm seeing mine tomorrow for the first time in three weeks.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Awesome, looking forward to it?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:54, Reply)

I cannot wait.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:04, Reply)

Tough 3 weeks?

(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:56, Reply)

It has seemed like years.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:05, Reply)

I bet you.
I was at a cool outdoor event on Saturday, with bands, drinks, food etc. It was pretty awesome for Beijing. I came home early as I was missing the family :-|
(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Woo Yay Etc.
Hope the ex doesn't fuck things up again
( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:02, Reply)

Sorry to hear that mate. Hope the rest of the week treats you better.
Alt - last night I met Labs and saw CombiChrist live. Those two will probably keep me cheered up for the rest of the year.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:53, Reply)

Labs is rather ace, isn't he?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Yes he really is
We had a great laugh. He also has several awesome friends. It was one of the best nights I've had in months, all told
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:56, Reply)

I find him to be an insufferable cunt, myself.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:57, Reply)

Only cos you're not as cheerful as he is.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:59, Reply)

He speaks very highly of you, conversely
*tries to keep a straight face*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:00, Reply)

a face

Sorry. I've got a hangover.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:34, Reply)

*tries to keep a straight face*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:54, Reply)

At the barbican there is a new theater show where instead of seats you've got a bed, and the whole thing is like a lulliby, and they say that nobody has seen the end 'cus eventually everyone falls asleep.
You can get a Single, Double or Tripple bed, and you can spoon and cuddle but no more than that.

I'm so exorsted right now that it sounds so lovely.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:56, Reply)

That sounds awesome!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:57, Reply)

well the 500 cigarettes and 18 cans of V you consume a day should wake you up in no time

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:26, Reply)

is this you coming out?
backing down from a scrap, baking, then crying about it. I thought northerners were tough...
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:57, Reply)

I don't fight, haven't done for years
I especially wouldn't be seen to be the one starting a fight in my local.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:58, Reply)

hence the classic phrase "OUTSIDE"

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 8:59, Reply)

Two steps out of the door and you're on a busy main road
Wouldn't be a good place for a scrap.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:00, Reply)

are you trying to convince me or yourself?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:02, Reply)

You
As I say, I don't fight.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:05, Reply)

but you do bake. 21st century boy eh.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:07, Reply)

No, I cook.
I don't bake.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:09, Reply)

so you never cook food with a dry heat, and no exposure to flame?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:20, Reply)

Leave it out Bobby, he's the pub bitch, he ain't worth it

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:23, Reply)

eh eh eh eh calm down calm down!

( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:24, Reply)

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:30, Reply)

FAKE!
The kid on the bottom left doesn't have a moustache
( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:34, Reply)

The guy second from bottom left looks like Borat.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:41, Reply)

Troll is troll

(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:40, Reply)

I can never understand what a chinaman means when there are r's and l's in the word.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:42, Reply)

T'o' is t'o'

(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:43, Reply)

So why was the said cunt threatening the aforementioned cross dresser?
The same stuff that has made me angry every week for the last 2 years

Alt. I installed Fallout 3 GOTY edition on my work PC.
( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:04, Reply)

Supposedly, on another night, I'd been giving him funny looks
But because I was pissed, he'd let me off, but if I ever did it again, etc etc. He was taking offence at everything I was saying, just acting like a right cunt.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:07, Reply)

Once upon a time
I had had reconstructive surgery on my leg, was in a full leg cast and on crutches and a guy was kicking off because I apparently said something to his mum a few week previously, which was bollocks. I tried to talk my way out of it but in the end said "Ok, if you really want to beat up a cripple lets go outside" we went outside and I stood there he said "Come on then" I pointed out that I couldn't punch him or kick him without falling over so he would have to do the fighting himself, he threw a punch which missed because his best mate tackled him and told him to stop being a fucking twat. The tackle broke the guys collar bone. *edit* my then girlfriend recorded it but the lens cap was on so its audio only but is still funny to listen to.
( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:13, Reply)

Delicious karma

(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Speaking as a married man in my 30s...
Pretty much anything and everything makes me angry.
Alt: the pain and misery of others
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Are you my conscience?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:12, Reply)

You are Dory AICMFP

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:13, Reply)

Are you my conscience?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:16, Reply)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5a1pmca5n_w

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Just the usual idiocy
However, I've started a new diet today. I want to shave the beer belly off before Leeds Festival.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:07, Reply)

You could ask Chompy for tips, he did a pre-Glasto detox
I will, however, say the same thing I said to him; deprive your body of festival-level fatty foods and vast quantities of beer for two months, and you will be unbelievably fucked within a couple of hours of getting your tent set up and indulging.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:10, Reply)

I don't eat that much fatty food as a rule.
I'm sticking with low-GI foods and avoiding beer, and sticking to things like rum, vodka etc. And exercise.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Good plan
Best of luck with it. Will be stepping up the running myself in the lead-up to InFest, feel free to motivate me with successful tales of weight loss!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:24, Reply)

It'll only be a couple of pounds a week
Nothing too drastic. Won't even notice it until my trousers start falling down I think.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:24, Reply)

There's a gay joke to be made here
Luckily for you I'm too tired to be creative.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:28, Reply)

Sucks for you fella.
Mind you, muesli and pouring yoghurt for breakfast is surprisingly tasty.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:29, Reply)

My appetite shows no signs of waking up
It's clearly still in bed. I wish I was my appetite.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:38, Reply)

What, boys?

(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Too tired from all the bumming?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:33, Reply)

Yes
And the 150-mile drive back from Leamington Spa, ending at 2.30am. But mostly the bumming.

EDIT: was talking about you last night. Labs was explaining various memes to his friends in the pub and suggested that whilst mine is bad, yours is worse.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:36, Reply)

hahahah
lab doesn't have friends
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:56, Reply)

Possibly he paid them to accompany him to the pub
They were bloody lovely in either case. As is he.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 10:01, Reply)

I am very happy at the moment.
Nuff said.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Woo!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Indeed.
About time to.
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:13, Reply)

o
(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:15, Reply)

About time to what, dear?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Grow a pair and man the fuck up!
RARGH!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Fuck your boring night!
Maria Sharapova!

She can polish my racket all night long, I would mind a double fault with her,

something about balls etc etc etc
( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:15, Reply)

I bet she would be as quiet as a mouse in bed

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Agreed
*Tall blonde girl appreciation fist-bumps*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:17, Reply)

This week
Angry: Nail through tyre. Idiots at work
Happy: Payday today! Hopefully off to the Shiremoor Treat on Sunday, which is like a fair. Visiting the Fire Station open day with the kids so they can play there
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:24, Reply)

The coverage given to this 'Pippa' (IITIHRN) person at the Andy Murray match made me mildy perturbed last night
It's not fucking OK! magazine it's a fucking tennis match. No, I don't care if Jay-Z, Ice-T or fucking Snow is there either.

Alt: This report just cheered me up: www.bbc.co.uk/nature/13958630
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:27, Reply)

She does have a cracking arse though

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:27, Reply)

Really?
I feel like the rest of the country is suffering from hypnotic suggestion since watching that wedding. It's not THAT great for fuck snakes.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:30, Reply)

^this

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:31, Reply)

I liked it - very pert

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:32, Reply)

I've seen better.

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:35, Reply)

IITIHRN?
*edit* Why do people think shes attractive, she looks like a skanky old lady who spent too much time in a sunbed
( Peej, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:30, Reply)

If indeed that is her real name

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:30, Reply)

If indeed that is what it really stands for...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:41, Reply)

Well played sir

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:42, Reply)

She reminds me of someone from Drop The Dead Donkey
She was something like a research assistant in it.

*heads to IMDB*
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:42, Reply)

Joy Merriweather
No idea what the actress was called, sorry
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:42, Reply)

*returns*
That's the one, she's called Susannah Doyle.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:45, Reply)

The character's name was Joy
And she was lovely.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:43, Reply)

Who told you Snow was there?
An Informer I'll bet.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:42, Reply)

I'm indifferent today
And I get to be the boss fo rthe next three days. I may fire myself so I can go enjoy the sun and rehiremyself on Monday
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:28, Reply)

I like it!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:29, Reply)

Good plan

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:29, Reply)

Woohoo!
Only one more sleep!
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:30, Reply)

YAY
I shall be frantically cleaning later tonight
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:31, Reply)

O2 have cut off my mobile data for excessive usage
even though I cut back after the first warning.

So that's me screwed until next Thursday when I get broadband at the flat. And no email or internet on the phone until the next billing date which is 20th July. Fuckers.

I'm going to look at switching providers. Who's good?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:29, Reply)

I used to use BeThere, they were fantastic.
But I've heard horror stories from others.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:30, Reply)

Screwfix Direct

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:31, Reply)

webuyanycar.com
ANY!
ANY!
ANY!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:32, Reply)

haha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:38, Reply)

The phrase is 'who's bad?', you div.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:37, Reply)

Sha'mone

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Gavin, 26, technician for Autoglass

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:37, Reply)

BE internet are pretty good.
Although their data protection policies worry me a bit. Anyone with the right information could get in to it. You don't even have to be the right gender.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:39, Reply)

and they do phones do they?
EDIT: You're all halfwits.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:54, Reply)

I've got a headache.
As you were.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:39, Reply)

That's be the dog fucking, that.

(McChinaman banned, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:42, Reply)

I think I need a hair of the dog.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:43, Reply)

Not the whole dog this time then?

( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:46, Reply)

*Waves*
Oww Blousie. I'm in pain.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Poor love : (
*strokes forehead*
( girlinthehole, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:52, Reply)

*Purrs like a contented cat*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 9:54, Reply)