fuck that shit
Water on mars people check the news
(PsychoChomp, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:26, 103 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Whatever next. Sand on your Twix?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:26, Reply)

Leave the internet

(PsychoChomp, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:28, Reply)

Hahaha!

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:55, Reply)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-14405732
(PsychoChomp, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:28, Reply)

blimey.
Habitable then. In the far future obviously.

Fascinating stuff.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:33, Reply)

Overpopulation on Earth seems to be a more pressing problem than shit on mars

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:37, Reply)

Seven Billion mouths and arseholes, heading towards ten

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:37, Reply)

Bloody catholics.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:40, Reply)

which is why we need to colonise
I suggest the new world, where the Indians and nig nogs are.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:40, Reply)

Europes population will in all likelihood decline by 20% pop pickers with the main areas of growth being in the slums of Asia and Africa
Yet more kids wandering around with a face full of flies
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:42, Reply)

The fly facers are typically rural populations.
The slum dwellers are the ones dying of cholera because they wash in their own shit.

Get your human tragedies right.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:45, Reply)

as long as I still have access to olive oil, camembert and Spanish wine I do not give a monkey's cock.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:47, Reply)

/attitude of most of Western culture

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:48, Reply)

Your life isn't worth living.
Do yourself in.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:52, Reply)

/satire

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:54, Reply)

You should be diagonally crucified.
/saltire
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:58, Reply)

I am Scottish.
So I am taking that as XENOPHOBIC McRACISM.

You disgusting fuck.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:00, Reply)

Tourism won't be their strength

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:48, Reply)

It's not done bad by Kenya or Botswana.
Or Uganda or Tanzania, come to that.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:53, Reply)

That's for wildlife and shit, all that'll be hoovered up as bush meat by then
Sadly watch the illiterate children play pass the poo won't have the same attraction. The occasional fly beard competion might hold some interest.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:06, Reply)

OMG!
This means we can live their soon, right?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:37, Reply)

we could live there now,
In a dome or underground.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:39, Reply)

water doesn't automatically mean the place is habitable
we'd still need domes as Mars's core cooled millions of years ago, any atmosphere it had would just float off into space
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 23:14, Reply)

This is good news.
I hope that one day, the world comes together and sets up a base on Mars.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:38, Reply)

The first place they are going to build there will be a hotel with conferencing facilities and a squash court.
*Work, Rest and Play lolz*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:40, Reply)

I'm glad it isn't called planet Tampax then.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:42, Reply)

Well depending on the gravity situation there, it might be quite good.
Parachute jumping would be a lot safer for one. And you'd probably fall over slower if you went rollerblading as well.

So it might not be too bad.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:44, Reply)

I wouldn't use a parachute on Mars, old boy.
There is fuck all atmosphere (Weston on a Monday night) the parachute would not inflate and your terminal velocity would be ankle shattering to say the least.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:47, Reply)

parachut would be rubbish
the gravity may be 0.8 but that doesn't stop you hitting the ground pretty hard. Also the thin atmosphere would make it much less likely to work proper without a massive parachute
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:47, Reply)

we should start planting arctic vegetation to make some oxygen and start a bit of terraforming.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:50, Reply)

Essentially correct.
But the tree huggers would object, cunts.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:51, Reply)

would they fuck.
We need to start now. The next lander should take some seeds and get planting.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:52, Reply)

Surely fornication between the great unwashed is there business.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:53, Reply)

You mean they would complain, and we just ignore them?
I'm all for it. Let's make Mars blossom.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:55, Reply)

read Kim Stanley Robinson by any chance?
Wasn't it the reds that didn't want mars changed?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:53, Reply)

Not heard of him, sorry Cavy.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:58, Reply)

you should read his Mars trilogy
it's all about the terraforming and social development of humans on Mars
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:00, Reply)

Ta, I'll investigate.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:01, Reply)

I think it's some of those crazy
extremophiles that were looking like the best candidates for terraforming.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:52, Reply)

So long as they excrete oxygen, then fine.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:57, Reply)

Would you hit the ground harder if you had a really heavy period?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:50, Reply)

Good experiment
We could drop one "normal" women off Clifton Suspension bridge, and one woman with the painters in. Whichever hits the Avon first would answer your question.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:53, Reply)

I reckon if I call the council they'd close the Portway so we could sell tickets.
Maybe make it an addition to next years harbour festival, seeing as there were no fireworks this year.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:54, Reply)

Get The Samaritans to sponsor the event.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:56, Reply)

ok Jeff
why?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:53, Reply)

Remember the noise the martian deathrays made in the 1950s War of the Worlds?
That's the noise your mum makes when I do this to her.

*this*
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:42, Reply)

Pew pew!

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:59, Reply)

will there be women with three tits?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:45, Reply)

If we make Broadsword Mars president,
Then yes.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:50, Reply)

we must start campaigning RIGHT NOW

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:51, Reply)

What about guys with big cocks?
The size of mutant cucumbers?
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:57, Reply)

*interested*

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:58, Reply)

In a story I wrote once
i used the phrase "...like an autumnal marrow sucked dry..." to describe an alien cock
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:59, Reply)

Still would for the prehensile tongue action.

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:00, Reply)

I can't say I wouldn't
but I can't afford to be picky these days
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:01, Reply)

Never mind Mars, I want to go to Uranus.
Anal lolz!
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:59, Reply)

I'm your venus!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:00, Reply)

I'm your fire!

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:01, Reply)

Yeah! Baby, you got it!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:02, Reply)

I don't get the joke.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:06, Reply)

: /

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:11, Reply)

Never mind that.
I'm one step closer to brassing on the continent.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:02, Reply)

never mind that
I got a cup of tea

and slightly damp, bleachy feet
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:05, Reply)

I've had four cups of tea today, none of them green.
Which is not on. My diet today has been fantastic, however.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:08, Reply)

This is of interest to me
Well done.

We (as a planet, generally) seem to be getting more and more information about the space outside our planet, but are losing the ability to do anything about it.

Even it were possible to colonise Mars, the cost and the time it would take make it completely out of the question. Unless they manage a multinational joint venture, which doesn't seem likely, considering how much everyone hates and distrusts everyone else. And most of us don't have the money to spare for space-faring research.

Sorry, that was taking the original comment a bit seriously. shall I make a quick knob joke instead?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:13, Reply)

once someone can make money out of it
it'll happen.

In the mean time we wait for the next global economic boom. Or crisis which panics us into doing stuff
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:18, Reply)

What we need is some kind of united federation ...

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:19, Reply)

^this
with William Shatner in High Office.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:20, Reply)

He's the one with the experience in this kind of thing.

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:22, Reply)

If there is alien life out there, he'll find it.
The females first, obviously.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:23, Reply)

There's been various sightings of a creature only known as 'Bella'
I don't remember him banging fat chicks though
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:24, Reply)

And then he'll sing to them from his greatest hits compilation.

( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:24, Reply)

AND then. He'll .... sing. Them. Songs from his GREATEST. Hits... collection.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:30, Reply)

I like this a lot
*eats a tribble*
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:19, Reply)

Fuck Yeah, it can all be based on Tekwars, whatever the fuck those books are on about

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:23, Reply)

TJ Hooker was shit.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:25, Reply)

I want to watch Galaxy Quest now

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:25, Reply)

You've said that all wrong

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:26, Reply)

it's a similar plot to
what BGB was planning
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:32, Reply)

By Grabthar's hammer...you might be onto something there

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:17, Reply)

I once used this as a reference in class once
(I think I was trying to help a student do something on photoshop and declared "By Grabthar's Hammer, I shall [whatever it was I was doing]")

None of the students had seen it and the other lecturer who was in the room led the inevitable piss-taking
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:24, Reply)

Well, as the old book says..
.."let he who is without Galaxy Quest quotes cast the first Grabthar's hammer"
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:11, Reply)

Love your sig Bill.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:18, Reply)

There was a time I watched that film so much I could name the sentences of all 12 of them
Over time I've learnt that repeating them a half second before they're said on-screen impresses no-one but myself.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:36, Reply)

Hi I'm drunk and feeling shit
Mars sounds good though
( Peej, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:32, Reply)

Evening Kroney.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:34, Reply)

haha

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:50, Reply)

Are you joining us on the Pier next month?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:09, Reply)

Depends on money I'm afraid
provisionally yes though
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:43, Reply)

Spend your Jobseekers allowance on a trip to the seaside!
It's the law.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:49, Reply)

Evening PJ
Why are you feeling shit?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:53, Reply)

My best friend and his missus just lost their baby
I'm feeling that guilt you get when you have two perfectly healthy kids and your mate just lost his.
( Peej, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:30, Reply)

Have they tried looking where they last saw it?
That sometimes works for me
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:33, Reply)

That sucks.
I saw a documentary about someone who'd lost their baby and they ended up stealing another child. It was gripping.

It was set in the Eastend of London.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:36, Reply)

I went through something similar about 18 months ago
when one of my best friends lost a baby. Full term, we nearly lost our friend too. Despite having no kids of my own, I did feel a bit guilty. There was just no way of knowing what to say.
It's one of teh reasons I went for this bungee jump - because the charity involved was a cot-death charity.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:36, Reply)

I just told them that I'm here day or night if they need me and to let me know
didn't know what else to say really, poor buggers
( Peej, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:39, Reply)

There really isn't anything you can say.
I just sent them a letter saying as honestly as I could what I felt and offering any help I could. Then I follwed it up with a long phone call a couple of days later. I guess the main advice I can give is don't avoid them, don't pretend that baby didn't exist, and be prepared to give them a lot of room for irrational behaviour for a while.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:42, Reply)

Won't be a problem
He's my best mate, As long as there's beer we won't avoid each other
( Peej, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:46, Reply)

Yeah, my pal's in Glasgow, so I don't get to see her that often.
You (and they) have my sympathy.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:48, Reply)

Im off now
GT4 won't play itself!
( Peej, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 22:49, Reply)

Now for aliens to take people over and start dribbling water everywhere...

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 4 Aug 2011, 23:11, Reply)

b3ta.turb0t.net/questions/offtopic/post1307901
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 23:21, Reply)

fuck that
I AM A HORSE
(Alfonso Bongo BELL AIRE HORSE EXTRAORDINAIRE, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 23:49, Reply)