Wrong x 2
The wankers are only in the south, if you go to the beaches in the North of the island, they're peaceful and nice.

There's snow almost all year round in the top of El Teide, and it can go down quite a lot during winter in the villages on the mountain.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:06, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Sorry, I meant Playa as in Playa de las Americas not just playa as in beaches in general
Hence the capital "P" ... I know the North is nice. I want the whole place to be nice so I don't have to deal with the fuckers at the airport.

And I should have qualified it as "snow for proper skiing on" not just snow.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:09, Reply)

Right, ok
I forgive you.

I hate the place from just after El Médano all the way to Los Cristianos. I wouldn't be too sad if it was destroyed by the volcano (without killing anyone, of course)

Yes, you can't ski there. In fact, there are so many things you can't do. That's why I left; it was too small for me. Only I wish I could go back for a bit now.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Los Christianos was lovely 20 years ago
before Las Americas swamped it
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)

I was never there 20 years ago
I just hope the rest of the South stays as it is and doesn't became like Los Cristianos or Las Américas.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)

Actually 15 years, now I think about it
Went there over New Year when I was 21 with the family and it was excellent.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)

The only money that place earns you refer to as "wankers"?
Welcome to Britain!

If you like it so much then why don't you go live there?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:09, Reply)

No work
I wish I could go back. Of course it has its bad things; like it's small and its expensive to travel; and people are bored and spend their days gossiping. Still, right now, I could do with the finishing work at 5 and going straight to the beach for a couple of hours.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:13, Reply)

Let's face it they are fucking wankers
Linekars, egg and chips, union jack shorts, sunburnt skin, drinking fosters all day, why can't the forrins speak English, etc etc etc
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:14, Reply)

I don't know if you're being sarcastic
but I've encountered many of those; and they're usually very rude. I hate the fact that in many places in the South of Tenerife the waiters/shop attendant/receptionist... can't speak Spanish at all.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)

Typical British 'working' class holiday abroad. Fat fucking scum

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)

No, he's not being sarcastic, he's agreeing
he's saying that a lot of British tourists (actually just tourists as the Dutch and the Germans are nearly as bad) in Tenerife are fucking wankers.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Yes
I don't know why, though. Why only the scum goes there? Maybe we should make it more expensive.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:32, Reply)

Going over there.
Taking your jobs!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)

No, it's not that
it's the fact that I want to order a meal in Spanish and I can't. My family can't speak English, so the one or two times we've gone there, they need me to translate. I don't think it's fair.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:32, Reply)

Life not fair, Aber?
When did this happen? I didn't get the memo.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:34, Reply)

What do you have against me now?
It's not fair because the same people being served by those waiters that can't speak Spanish are those who complain about foreigners not speaking proper English and taking their jobs and women.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:45, Reply)

Life isn't fair. Just a very small joke.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 16:05, Reply)

And about the money
most of the British that go there (and other Europeans) go with full paid package bought in Britain. The hotels get some of money, but that's about it; the "wankers" we talked about are those who spend the day in the swimming pool eating sausages and beans.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:15, Reply)

We fought in two world wars to preserve our right to be ignorant boorish bean eating (ironylols) wankers!
What were you doing?

(All civil war and Guernica references will be dismissed as irrelevant).
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)

We were doing irrelevant things
I have to say too, that I get very upset when the Spanish people tells me that British don't know how to cook and that they only eat sausages and beans. The morons that visit only eat that, but British cooking is one of the most complicated I've ever seen (probably that's why you have gone for sandwiches and mash potatoe for every day). I'm unable to do a proper roast, leave apart a pie.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:20, Reply)

Don't leave the pie apart.
It will ruin it.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:22, Reply)

?
Game of words there? I don't get it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)

"apart" meaning "in separate pieces"
a pie left as separate parts wouldn't really be a very good pie.

Pies are dead easy to make. Try it. Just get a recipe from BBC good food.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)

It's the dought that worries me
I've seen Mark making it and I don't think I can.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:29, Reply)

don't.
buy it. Even I can rarely be arsed to make pastry and I make pretty much everything else from scratch. But I like puff pastry for pies and it's a monumental fanny to make.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:30, Reply)

Oh, ok
like that is easy. What I meant is cooking traditional English food is quite complicated and needs a lot of work and time. If we're going to start cheating with the dought we can just buy ready meals.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:34, Reply)

It's not the same. Pastry=cheat but if the rest is homemade=nom.
Your cooking is fucking ace anyway.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:36, Reply)

Spanish cooking
in general, for every day, is much easier than British. We can cook a very nice meal in a few minutes. I think that's what the British are missing. You went for full roasts that took a day to cook to just a sandwich. There's not much in the middle.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:40, Reply)

It would be a terrrible sandwich with nothing in the middle.
Hahahahahahaha!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:57, Reply)

That's not cheating
If you follow that argument, not butchering your own meat is cheating. Or not brewing your own wine.

Pastry isn't difficult to make, it's just tedious and home-made (unless you are making sweet pastry) is rarely much better. So, I make my own dough for bread and for pizza, for example, but I'd almost never make my own pie pastry.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:40, Reply)

leave apart should be "never mind"
To leave apart is to disassemble.

DISASSEMBLE?

/film
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)

I'd suggest "let alone"

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:28, Reply)

I would reject your suggestion out of hand.
Despite it being perfectly correct.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:29, Reply)

I would expect nothing less old boy.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:33, Reply)

Let alone
I think that's the one I was thinking of, but couldn't remember.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:30, Reply)

I wouldn't worry.
Your English better than our Spanish and all that.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:34, Reply)

Thank you
I'll try to remember.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:29, Reply)

There is no try, only do.
/film
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:30, Reply)

I can only try to do it

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:35, Reply)

Learn you will.
/film
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:36, Reply)

Only if I want.

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:38, Reply)

the little known smørrepie.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:24, Reply)

All inclusive packages are killing a lot of small European tourist towns and villages.
People have a tendency to have a wander into the town for a look around and maybe lie on the beach, but spend very little money while they're there. Personally an all inclusive would be my idea of hell. Doubly so if there were wasps about.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)

But you could drown the wasps in pre-paid beer.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:20, Reply)

To be honest, it's probably all that the beer would be good for anyway.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:21, Reply)

Don't take the piss out of our beer etc...

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)

All inclusive in Mexico was fucking amazing!
That's the only time I've done it, mind you.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:21, Reply)

I bet
if you hadn't had it and had gone exploring the restaurants and bars in the city you would have found it amazing too. Maybe even more.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)

We did this as well
It was just nice to have free excellent food and beer on tap (and optics in the room above the always stocked beer fridge)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:24, Reply)

I can imagine it been nice
I'd still want to go an explore around. In fact, lately I don't even get breakfast at the hotels, as I like to try what's out there from the very morning!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:27, Reply)

I have been on some belting all inclusives.
I like it because I don't have to encounter the disgusting poor riff-raff that live in these backward, god forsaken, weather blessed countries.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:25, Reply)

Go to the nicer places, not the touristic ones
spend a bit more money or get on a bus to get out of the crowd. It's worth it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:28, Reply)

It really isn't.
They are quite ugly and very smelly.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:32, Reply)

The nicer places?
Oh, well. Your concept of nice is different to mine, clearly. There are really beautiful places in the sun blessed countries; with no tourists in most of them, especially if you go for mountain holidays.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:36, Reply)

I am pulling your leg. You are, of course, correct.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:37, Reply)

Oh, sorry
I'm very bad at sarcasm most of the times. Let alone in English.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:38, Reply)

This is genius

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:39, Reply)

If, perhaps, it's in an undeveloped resort then maybe I'd consider doing it.
But if I'm going on holiday somewhere, I want to experience some of the culture of the country I'm in. I cannot understand how some people can sit on the beach or by the pool all day, it would bore me to tears, even with a good book at hand. A couple of days of that is OK, but a whole fortnight? You might as well have a few sessions on a sunbed at home, and then go out every night.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:25, Reply)

It was post Katrina so basically only the big hotels were left!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)

Ah, fair enough then.
I got caught in Hurricane George in Florida back in the 90's. Scary as fuck. Driving back from the Keys, there was a sudden flash flood and the road went from being 'a bit wet' to about 18" of water within a few minutes. The full force of the hurricane hit the day after we flew home.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:30, Reply)

There were plenty of people like that in Mallorca this year
If was our first holiday of that type we'd ever taken and if didn't have the hire car I'd have gone crazy, and we were only there for a week. Just ten minutes drive from the resort was this fantastic old sanctuary at the top of a 509m mountain. The drive up there ranks as the second most terrifying of my life but it was worth it and the kids really enjoyed it. Not one other person I spoke to at the hotel had heard of it. Two weeks sitting by the pool drinking San Miguel and slush puppies whilst turning into a roast turkey would send me ga-ga.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:49, Reply)

If indeed you are Lady Gaga

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:51, Reply)

We were offered all inclusive for our honey moon
and considered it for the price, but decided we prefered to enjoy the "real places" and we not only did really enjoy the experience but ended up saving money. What's the good thing about traveling if you're going to spend a week in a hotel eating the food and watching the tv you'd have at home? I don't understand.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:22, Reply)

We went out the hotel quite a bit in Mexico
50mph speedboats FTW!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)

I bet they were!
I just think, if I can help the comunity buying stuff I'd buy anyway, I'd rather do it; even if it's a bit more expensive. It must be my growing in a touristic place. Or the fact that everywhere we went they'd tell you not to give money for charity to anyone (especially children) but spend that money you'd give on a product you could use, and therefore, help to sustain the market. (I don't know if that made any sense)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 7 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)