A work colleague once tried to put the wrong RAM in a laptop
and when it didn't fit cut a notch in it with a hacksaw and was surprised when it didn't work. When we take the piss out of him for it months on and name him "RAMslayer" he gets very defensive and tries to justify his stupidity. I think he is ace though.
( Peej, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:30, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

We have "pastie club" at work
If you are deemed to have done something which is:

a. Stupid
b. Affects other users

You have to buy the pasties for the other pastie club members. One of the lads is off into town now as he fucked up all our RAS machines.

Cheers Jamie, I'll have a Cornish!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:33, Reply)

With extra carrots?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:34, Reply)

BLEURGHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
There you go
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:34, Reply)

I thought I was going to throw up this morning
Feeling better now though.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:35, Reply)

I had to sit VERY still for 1/2 an hour this morning until my MDs kicked in

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

MDs?

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Massive Drugs
Lots and lots of painkillers
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:40, Reply)

I'd suggest Tramadol.
Works for me.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:46, Reply)

I've only ever taken that once
Never again
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:53, Reply)

It works,
and dulls the pain of coping with twats.
God, I'm a miserable sod today.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 11:01, Reply)

Swallowing man fat apparently has that effect.
Morning git, how's you?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Not too bad thanks motherfucker
Realised I'm financially fucked this morning, have however rememered I am owed £100, so that will take the sting off it.

I think I'm going to have to go to the bank of my parents though, not good.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:49, Reply)

You need to buy less rabbit meat, ZX Spectrum games, Emilio Estafez memorabilia and hob nail boots

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:53, Reply)

The rabbit was fairly cheap, £4
Considering the amount I got for £25, I'd say that was a good shop.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Hob nail boots?
Are you a 19th century miner?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 11:00, Reply)

I meant the meat shop

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 11:10, Reply)

Pretty sure this is gay slang

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 11:20, Reply)

Bloody hell
That's a surefire way to get your lunch sorted here. One person would be buying them all the time.

Or she would be, if she hadn't been fired for being thick as pigshit.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:37, Reply)

It keeps you on your toes
as a pastie round is about £15!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

The last thick woman who worked here left for another job the day before an error was uncovered that would have seen her sacked
The MD was gutted he didn't get the chance to do it.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

What did she do?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:39, Reply)

She took a dump in the kettle didn't she?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:43, Reply)

Well, one of the many things was that she *forgot* to invoice a client for a job we'd done for them
They had to remind us, which is obviously quite embarrassing. Especially when the job is for £35k.

As for the final thing, currently can't remember, but will find out.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:51, Reply)

Oh, I wish you could fire someone just for that.
My last job would have been so much more pleasant.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:45, Reply)