i've never smoked
but it is the most pointless, pathetic and disgusting habit. it smells, it is expensive, it is anti-social, it stains your teeth, your fingers, it is bad for you, you have NO IDEA how badly you stink to non-smokers, both in terms of breath and even just following you into a lift or something. and lots of smokers leave their vile butts lying around. i once had a date with a guy who not only smoked cheap-ass rollies, but left half a tonne of them on the windowsills of my balcony without making any effort to clear them up. one of the rudest, most ignorant things i've ever seen.

so quit because you're a winner!

i think my answer to the second question also covers the first.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:21, 1 reply, 13 years ago)

It is an extremely stupid habit.
Went to a cessation clinic at my GP's this morning. Plan is stop tomorrow evening once my wife has gone to her parents for a week. That way I will get through the first few most difficult days without shouting at her.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:25, Reply)

just remember you are stronger than the fags
and if that doesn't work... imagine this conversation in 4 years' time...

mummy, where's daddy?

he's not here right now, darling.

mummy, what's a bronchioloalveolar carcinoma?

well, that's why daddy isn't here right now, darling...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:27, Reply)

Ouch.
I will print this off and pin it up.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:29, Reply)

tough love, baby!
you will quit if you think of stuff like that, though. seriously, i used to cry as a small child when my grandma smoked, because i thought she was going to die.

she didn't die - but she DID get gangrene in her foot and lost a toe.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

A couple of years ago another B3tan told me about her dad having his voicebox removed as a result of smoking.
This is also in my mind - given what a loudmouthed cunt I am.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:33, Reply)

Lovely.
I think I'll go for a tab, now.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:36, Reply)

it's nasty shit
my grandma's blackened toe stump is definitely why i didn't ever smoke when all my mates were getting into it. and when the doctor told her she had to give up smoking, she said defiantly: and what if i don't?

that's fine, he said. but i'll see you this time next year to take off the rest of your leg.

she gave up.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:36, Reply)

Keep 'em coming. It's all helping.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:38, Reply)

My favourite fag packet warning is that bloke with the massive throat tumour.
Only, you don't notice the tumour straight away because of the utterly ridiculous and unkempt facial hair.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

I always think that is Billy Childish
But I'm not aware of him having had a throat tumour.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:42, Reply)

I've heard that the main way to help is to do something else instead
i.e. have a glass of water, go for a 10 min walk, etc.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:28, Reply)

Masturbation

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:28, Reply)

I smoke 30 a day ffs! Can't manage that many wanks.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:30, Reply)

Your hands would be too tired to smoke then

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

You considered it though

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Just don't mix the two up, or you'll scorch your scrotum.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Knitting is meant to be extremely effective
And extremely effeminate.

So, win/win for Battered
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:29, Reply)

What sort of scarf would you like?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:42, Reply)

It does make you look cool though...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:28, Reply)

only cigars
men smoking cigars makes me want to dry hump.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)

I think your bizarre daddy issues have been discussed at length before
So there is no need to go over them again here.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:33, Reply)

oh hush it you
lots of girls find the smell of cigars masculine and sexy!

AND some guys find girls smoking cigars to be sexy for some random reason.

prob because the cigar looks like a cock. men are subtle like that.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:34, Reply)

I'm not in a position to comment on what girls find sexy
My knowledge is more in the field of things that they find wholly unattractive.
But before I hush, I'm interested to note that you think that a phallus in the mouth is a sexy look for a man...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:40, Reply)

i only like the way it smells!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:44, Reply)

you only like the smell of a cock in a man's mouth?
curious. *pages Freud*
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:47, Reply)

you know what?
i prefer it to the smell of cigarettes!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:49, Reply)

I have one cigar to smoke. My best man gave it to me to smoke when the baby was born. I will have this tomorrow.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:33, Reply)

Sign off smoking with it
Have a largey braaandaay too
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:41, Reply)

I like this. But red wine I think.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:42, Reply)

This sounds like a good plan.
I'm a fairly recent convert to rollies, and have found that I've cut right down as a result of not being arsed to keep making them. Last night, as I sat down in the porch freezing my nuts off, I figured that winter time is as good a time as any to try giving up. Especially if it's a fucking cold winter.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:31, Reply)