Ah, yes, foreplay, I've heard of that
Something to do with sex, only applies to every fourth sexual partner, so it's not something I've concerned myself with
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:46, 1 reply, 14 years ago)

Because you've only had 3 (wo)men?

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:49, Reply)

That's only one more woman than I've had.

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:52, Reply)

...yet

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:52, Reply)

Nah! not going back there.
Unless K D Lang gives me a call.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:54, Reply)

...yet

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:56, Reply)

Yep

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:57, Reply)

This is not as much fun as an outraged denial.
*pouts*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 14:58, Reply)

and makes you look like a tart

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:00, Reply)

Anyone who's slept with more people than me is not categorised as a tart
more, a "human"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:02, Reply)

:D

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:05, Reply)

Except you
You're definitely a tart
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:06, Reply)

Haha
And you're a fruit.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:07, Reply)

We should go on Masterchef
as ingredients
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:15, Reply)

does that make you (and me for that matter) not human?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:07, Reply)

And me!
But I think we all knew that anyway...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:08, Reply)

You're a cyborg sent from the future to rob Weston Super Mare of bra material

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:12, Reply)

Give me your parachute and your bike.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:13, Reply)

*hands over goods, entranced by bosom*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:16, Reply)

But he IS a tart
There was a memo and everything!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:02, Reply)

This is true.
Sadly I'm a tart with morals which means I've only slept with 3 times as many people as foxtrot. A sad state of affairs I'm sure you agree.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:06, Reply)

Especially since I have three years in which to catch up

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:13, Reply)

You're only 33?
You bastard.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:13, Reply)

I'm 46 and have only slept with about eight or nine people.
Two of those were women and one was a merkin so they don't count.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:15, Reply)

+ at any one time

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:16, Reply)

How old did you think I was?!

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:16, Reply)

I dunno, about my age, you know, normal aged.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:17, Reply)

Haha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:18, Reply)

Isn't it past your bed time?

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:21, Reply)

Don't take this the wrong way
but most people, upon meeting me, think I'm younger than I am, not older
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:18, Reply)

People have stopped assuming mr b3th is my father.
As he seems not to be aging at all, I can only assume I now look about fifty.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:20, Reply)

Beard have a way of halting the ageing process.
When you are young they make you look older (clean shaven I imagine I look about 15) and then you stay that age for ever.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:21, Reply)

I think I'm aging exponentially

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:22, Reply)

But on the upside, people have stopped assuming that your husband is your father
That must be... a GOOD thing, right?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:22, Reply)

I hadn't actually given the matter any thought
I just hate people being younger than me. I think I tend to be taken for younger than I am too, this may have skewed my perception of what 36 looks like.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:20, Reply)

3 times as many people as

Dear me, do I have to do everything myself?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:13, Reply)

That would make you a wanker, not a tart.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:14, Reply)

Why does sleeping with Darth make me a wanker?
Not that I deny the accusation.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:16, Reply)

Because I haven't got any hands

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:18, Reply)

Riiiight.....

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:18, Reply)

How does he smell?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:19, Reply)

Mostly of spray-tan and KY Jelly.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:22, Reply)

oops
the cold made me misread that as spray mount (that glue in an aerosol)
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:26, Reply)

doing everything yourself, silly.
Jesus, is everybody retarded today, or is my sarcasmometer broken?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:18, Reply)

I got it honey
I got it goooooooood
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:20, Reply)

This one?


It could do with a good servicing
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:20, Reply)

Couldn't we all, babe...

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:23, Reply)

yes

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:26, Reply)

Bobby will be back in Wales after xmas
I'm sure if you asked him nicely....
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:27, Reply)

Oh, that's fucking IT
Why am I not getting these memos? Why aren't you including me? b3th knows and she's been dead for a week! Why don't you want me to play with you? *self-harms*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:07, Reply)