Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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How do you stop procrastinating?I have had a load of things to do for a few days and I simply cannot be arsed, even though it is in my own interest to do them. Your tips please on how to motivate myself to get off the sofa and do what I need to do.*
Alt: What’s the most important thing you need to do that you keep putting off?
*Anyone making comments about how they delayed answering this question because they couldn’t be bothered can kill themselves.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:04,
187 replies,
latest was 14 years ago)
I do.Very well thanks. How about you?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:08,
Reply)
No complaints apart from my phone being a useless shiteWhat have I missed around these parts?
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:12, Reply)
It was bloody great thanks mateNot the parks sadly, they were rainy and overcrowded, but the dancing we saw was fucking brilliant. Best dancers in the world, and all that. You'd have been bored senseless mind
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:20, Reply)
I am quite partial to a skimpily dressed bird with rock hard arse muscles.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:27, Reply)
You'd have loved the bird who won the Latin thenJulia her name was. Blonde Russian type. We saw her with her partner in one of the restaurants and Ms Foxtrot commented on her buns of steel.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:33, Reply)
You've lost your bottle opener?(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:35,
Reply)
Bet the pics of Jodie Marsh recently gave you the right horn, didn't they?(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:44,
Reply)
Very little.Other than it took me, Monty, Jeff and CQ some time to recover from Jeffstock.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:26,
Reply)
I'd start by shutting down B3ta for a while.Alt: I need to sort my diet out. I quit drinking nearly 2 years ago and smoking last January, but my diet has been in decline ever since. I actually have a bit of a belly, which I've never had before. So that. Starting when I've finished this coke, vegetable samosa and bag of pickled onion Monster Munch that I just got from the sandwich man.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:09,
Reply)
Sort it in JanuaryWhy deny yourself nice food over Christmas, particularly if you aren't drinking?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:23,
Reply)
I've been really struggling with procratination recently, I think it's because my body is wanting to wind down for Christmas, despite this being our busiest time of yearI've just spent 20 minutes writing up a story for QOTW, despite the fact I've got a massive list of jobs to get through at the moment.
Speaking of which, I'd better get those done, cheerio!
Alt: Probably the fact I've finally gone in to arrange my surgery. I've been putting that off for 2 years.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:11,
Reply)
don't know if you saw my question in the other thread, did you see that aniston film?(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:12, Reply)
Yes, I replied over thereNo, I haven't seen it, it looks awful.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:13,
Reply)
it was a bit WTF? but i thought you might have empathised with the main character(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:15, Reply)
No, she's fine and lives in Florida/o\
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:30,
Reply)
I start with the shittiest task. Once that's done, the others are easy. (, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:14, Reply)
Alt: getting back on the fucking treadmillOh, and work. Obviously.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:14, Reply)
Wank until you're spaffing dust.Alt: Wank until I'm spaffing dust. Or, probably, sort out all the paperwork for a new MSc in Process Engineering. It's definitely one or the other that I need to do this week.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:16,
Reply)
I'm really unsure how my age speeds up my ability to do paperwork.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:23,
Reply)
because your hands are shakingand you're having to breathe heavily to concentrate.
because at your age you get distracted easily.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:27,
Reply)
well, quit.... ooh, a butterfly!(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:30,
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nothing gay here,nothing bent at all. nope. not a hint of a tint of pink.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:31,
Reply)
i think there are 2 jokes in thereboth are equally tired
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:59,
Reply)
i'm going in january!well, almost. we tend to meet at pubs on the way these days, bit nearer for us.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:02,
Reply)
I bloody love it therePartly because of childhood memories and partly because my Aunt & Uncle's house is gorgeous and has a fantastic view of rolling hills. Which I never get to see normally on account of them not having been invented in Norfolk.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:08, Reply)
i love going up there too, for exactly the same reasonsunfortunately now that my grandma's gone, i don't go very often :(((
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:10,
Reply)
Sorry to hear thatWe'll do a daytrip. You and me. We'll marvel at the Dean Clough factory, walk around a bit until we get cold then go to The Winterburn and drink until the hills actually start rolling.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:16, Reply)
Chemical and Biochemical Engineering/Bioprocessing.I'm sure that's helped shed some light.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:30,
Reply)
I try to imagine how I will feel a week from now, having still not completed the taskThen a massive sensation of panic grips me to the point I can scarcely breathe. When I compose myself and realise I still have time, it's then that I get to work.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:20, Reply)
I think the only upside to my job is that I don't get a week to put things off forThe most I ever get to put a job off by is 3 days, as after that the job is usually due out.
Also, good morning Newbie.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:21,
Reply)
What sort of environment do you work in then?(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:26,
Reply)
telecommsBeen with the company for years, but my job changed a few months ago, so this 'year end' is totally different for me than it was last year
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:28, Reply)
You wouldn't happen to be 32, FROM NORWICH, would you?(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:31,
Reply)
Not to worryTis simply an ongoing joke aimed at Darth
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:41,
Reply)
I must add the caveat that if you work for BT we are mortal enemies(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:47, Reply)
Oh thank GODYou're not a fellow employee of a well-known company incorporating a distaste for wires into its names are you?
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:56, Reply)
Haha, noMy company's name is what Gonz would call one of the big walking things from Star Wars.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:02, Reply)
Nicely done thereI'm pretty sure we can continue to coexist peacefully without having to join battle armed only with telephones, as is the time-honoured tradition of rival telecoms employees.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:04, Reply)
I love the idea of a shady cabal of telecoms employeesWhich is, of course, preposterous *knowing wink*
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:14, Reply)
"i'll procrastinate tomorrow"i am hopeless. i will always do the new exciting work over the old boring bit; i will always go out rather than tidy up; i am habitually 10 mins late for everything because i get distracted by something else...
.... i really need to stop procrastinating on cutting ALL contact with the ex. i have taken the first step by suggesting that we cancel meeting up on saturday. and then i figure by the time he comes back from thailand in the new year, he'll be so riddled with disease that i'll be happy to stay on the other side of london anyway!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:20,
Reply)
Just one last text - two wordsFUCK OFF
Sorted...
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:24,
Reply)
i can't be that horriblei'm far too sweet
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:26,
Reply)
You need to grow a pair and tell him!(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:27,
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humphalso his brother is hot. i don't want to burn all my bridges......!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:28,
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So you are going to keep meeting/dating/fucking him just to see his brother?Man, girls are weird
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:29,
Reply)
no, not really, i was just being flippanthis brother lives with his other half.
and i am neither dating nor fucking him. sadly!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:31,
Reply)
I'm moving house on SaturdayI haven't packed my stuff up, thrown anything away, cancelled the utilities, tv licence, sky, sorted the council tax out on the new place or hired a van.
All I've done is cancel the council tax on this place, but I still need to cancel January's payment at my bank and no, I haven't done that either.
I am shit.
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Kroney, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:20,
Reply)
Fucking hell, even I was more organised than that when I moved out(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:23,
Reply)
That's not great, I'm not going to lie to you.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:32,
Reply)
It doesn't help that I'm really fucking busy at work and don't have any free timeto be sitting on the phone to call centres and councils.
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Kroney, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:38,
Reply)
I don't stop procrastinating.alt: sort out my pension
alt alt: frenulum breve.
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Hey, Personality HorseBig fan...can I have something signed please?
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:31, Reply)
'Horse Talk' mag are giving away signed copies of that PH demo comp,'The Turdcoil Sessions' to three lucky subscribers.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:36,
Reply)
It's being billed as 'the publishing coup of the year'and rightly so.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:41,
Reply)
MB, if you could have any signed Personality Horse merchandise, which signed Personality Horse merchandise would you want?(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:54, Reply)
He'd get you to sign his cock.I mean, it would just end up saying 'PERS', but it's the thought that counts.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:56,
Reply)
Where to start.Ideally a handbill from one of the early gigs. I remember one at Morecambe Cocklers Hall where I met M after the show and got a flexidisc.
Oh man, happy days.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:02,
Reply)
Write a To Do listThen read the list and panic!
Alt:
Lots of work as too much on at the moment.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:26,
Reply)
I'd cut online activity down for a while.I discovered Second Life years ago, and was on it constantly. My real life suffered badly, and I turned into an internet fatty, and didn't see real friends for AGES. I only went out the house for food and work. Shit really.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:32, Reply)
Seriously. Dude.*shakes head*
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:38,
Reply)
could be worse, you could have got yourself into serious doebt and taken it out on people on the internet by being an angry gay(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:39, Reply)
This is early-stage Bertdown material.How long til the main event?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:40,
Reply)
is that the sister fucking?or the posting his jug eared mug on a dating website?
i forget.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:41,
Reply)
I'm thinking more1. Posting every fifteen seconds like a foaming-mouthed autist
2. Being abusive
3. Backpedalling and vainly trying to be liked
4. Properly flipping out, posting porn or whatever
5. Finally admitting to being Bert
6. MELTDOWN
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:44,
Reply)
eh? i'm not this person this persons accusing me of, i think he just has some developmental problemsand anyone who isn't nice to him immediately reminds him of that first, bitter rejection at this coming out party
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:47, Reply)
There are only two possibilities here.1. You are Bert
2. You have precisely the same personality disorder as Bert
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:50,
Reply)
What is it that you dislike so much about your 'real' personalitythat leads you to hide behind such a dismal 'online persona'?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:54,
Reply)
what is it about your dismal personality that makes you take everything online so personal and serious?(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:54, Reply)
Monty, stop making me agree with this mad fella(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:56,
Reply)
Just simmer down and let bert/quentin get on with it.You're in danger of being an angry old bedwetter on the internet.
None of it matters.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:01,
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I'm trying to provoke a Bertdown.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:03,
Reply)
its funny cos it seems to me that your the only one having a breakdownbut i imagine the stress of bankrupcy, drug adiction and been a failed single parent would probly do that to a person
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:03, Reply)
Or the guilt and shame of having fucked a sibling when she was but fifteen.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:09,
Reply)
yeah probs, have you done that as well as everythin else?not had much luck have yuo?
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:11, Reply)
^ this is basically'I know you are but what am I?'
Excellent work.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:15,
Reply)
no ity isn't, you keep sticking to the same nonsense and i'm failing to understand what your getting atand trying to make sense of what terrilbe thing has made you this way
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:21, Reply)
i for one welcome the angry bedwettingit's infinitely preferable to kittums and cuddles and lolwacki "cutesy" mispellings to show what a kerazeeeeee internet jokester japester i am.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:05,
Reply)
I'd imagine the paedophilic incestual tendencies would probably do the trick.(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:55,
Reply)
I think you meant,good grief man, you're infatuated.
Just being helpful.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:54, Reply)
There's only one way to find out if he's Bert(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:50,
Reply)
do it, i need to clear my name, y'allsbesides that guy on talk already done a confirm thing on the onld ip
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:51, Reply)
^thiswith added "for fuck's sake"
One of the Education Development people here spent ages trying to convince me that holding tutorials in Second Life was a brilliant idea. She hasn't spoken to me since I lost my rag and said Second Life purely exists for sad arseholes that don't even have the balls to have an affair in real life.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:44,
Reply)
Comments noted.I run a net cafe part time, and so can fuck around online whenever I'm at work. I limit online activity at home/out, just checking emails. I never actually had an affair though.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:48, Reply)
I don't actually really think it's that bad, although it's blatant escapismbut the idea of holding a Uni tutorial in it is just retarded.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:53,
Reply)
I still don't really understand what second life is beyondwhat I've read in The Metro about people spending fortunes of real money on fake money, which just confuses me.
And I think that Snow Patrol did a gig on it that they charged people to see, which is enough to make me hate it anyway even without quite understanding how that works.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:50,
Reply)
You do have to pay for stuff in there.It's just like normal life. But you invent a whole new person because, basically, you're a fat shutin who hates your real personality.
It confuses me because I understand computer games in which you can do things that reality prevents you from doing. I see the point of that. There's nothing you can do in Second Life that you couldn't just grow up and do in reality. And then you'd actually be doing it, as an added bonus.
But, meh, each to their own.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:55,
Reply)
i think it's a bit more dangerous than that for some peoplelike those horrendously lardy yanks who met on there, then he had an affair (but only online) and his missus came in and saw the second life characters having an affair onscreen... unbelievable.
and the losers who let their daughter starve to death whilst playing it.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:00,
Reply)
I'm fairly sure these are people the gene pool can afford to lose.(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:03,
Reply)
i have it in my head that the daughter was adoptedbut i might have made that up
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:05,
Reply)
Pretty certain you can't get assfucked by a unicorn in real life.Pretty certain you can in Second Life.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:09,
Reply)
Somebody get this man an account, stat(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:15,
Reply)
I READ AN ARTICLEin Gay Unicorn Fancier Quarterly
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:25,
Reply)
Well, no, you can be virtually assfucked by a unicorn in Second Lifein reality, you can be assfucked by a man dressed as a unicorn. Which is a infinite amount closer to actually being assfucked by a unicorn, surely?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:16,
Reply)
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1470260
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:27,
Reply)
QUENTINIf you to compare my hands to the hands of any famous directors, which famous director's hands would you say they most resemble?
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:52,
Reply)
No, if you're bert you've seen a picture of my hands on someone's facebook apparently(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:54,
Reply)
for serious?can i make a guess? i'm gonna go for soderberg, you got soderberg hands baby
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:55, Reply)
HANDS Christian Anderson.HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:55, Reply)
i'm gonna hang up my cape and tassles, personallity horse just won the internet(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:56, Reply)
WRONGit's not Bert.
Bert said i had hands like Martin Scorsese.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:57,
Reply)
Alternatively, he's simply not taking the bait(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:58,
Reply)
When he was 'The Cat Hater', IIRC it took a couple of weeks of baiting before he went into full bertdown(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:05,
Reply)
he sent me a huge string of emailsall about his non-existent wife and life... it was epically, stupendously mental.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:06,
Reply)
"You're taking the Bert, man. It was a decent offer!"(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:00,
Reply)
eeeeowwho would take the bert? i mean... who would want it?!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:06,
Reply)
I'm sure his sister would have preferred the choice.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:09,
Reply)
how many more films can we all think of with dead mums? i've come up with quite a few it seems like a fairly commomn theme(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:12, Reply)
Who Will Love My Children?The Others
Batman
Superman
To name a few others
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:16,
Reply)
theres bloody loads!when are you going to turn into a superhero or heart-rending story of triumph over adversity then?
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:19, Reply)
Make a list and prioritise itThen do the *second* thing on the list. Procrastination is your subconscious telling you that something is a bad idea or not properly planned. Once you've got a better handle on it you'll do it.
Alt: getting an appraisal on my old place. I'm going to phone an estate agent today- honest.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:58,
Reply)
I AM THE QUEEN OF PROCRASTINATION AND HEAR ME ROAR!!!!But this morning I have kicked ass and done fucking loads of work. At home, however, it's a different matter. I bought some paint for my kitchen windowsill when I moved in, FOUR FUCKING YEARS AGO, and it's still not painted.
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girlinthehole, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:21,
Reply)
I stripped half the paint off my bathroom window because some dozy turd painted it shut.I took off just enough paint to enable me to open the window and stopped. Two years ago.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:24,
Reply)
I win.Decorated 2003, and took door handles off. Still not put them back.
(, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:33, Reply)
I think we're all 'winners' here(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:37,
Reply)
I replaced the letterbox on my front door.It let enough heat out and draught in to render the central heating pointless.
How many winters did it take for me to finally give in and seal it? 2 and a half.
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Kroney, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:39,
Reply)
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