OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD I HAVE TO HAVE THIS, I SIMPLY MUST HAVE TO REALLY REALLY GOING TO BUY THIS ON PAYDAY
www.ebay.co.uk/itm/gargoyle-door-knocker-doorknocker-gargoyle-face-green-man-tree-goth-gothic-/150702172795?pt=UK_Home_Garden_Decorative_Accents_LE&hash=item23168caa7b#ht_1972wt_1413
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:04, 5 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

That's not a gargoyle.
/QI
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:05, Reply)

It is a grotesque, is it not?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:07, Reply)

I believe so.
Although I haven't checked this. If QI I say it I believe it to be true until they correct themselves.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)

That's reasonable. They do their homework.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)

But look at him ! Just look at him ! It's from one of my favorite films, The Labyinth

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)

Ooh, I missed that bit.
25 years old this year, that film. There's a massive retrospective of it in this months Empire, if you're interested.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:09, Reply)

Oh sweet ! I'll pick up a copy.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:18, Reply)

You should buy a Mohammed Al Fayed garden gnome instead.
Yes they do exist.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:06, Reply)

Or one of these.
www.ebay.co.uk/sch/i.html?_nkw=gargoyle+door+knocker&_sacat=0&_odkw=door+knocker&_osacat=0&_trksid=p3286.c0.m270.l1313
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:07, Reply)

Dude. Have you taken leave of your senses?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)

!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekZiFrMUyiY
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:09, Reply)

Answer the question.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Maybe possibly, BUT LOOK AT IT, it's AWESOME.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)

It really, really isn't.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Reasons why it's awesome.
- If anyone walks past my flat on Ket or LSD or whatever, then it'll freak them the fuck out.
- I can give it a comedy--not-a-comedy-name like "Martin" or "George" or something.
- It'll be a friendly happy face to great me as I come in home from going out in lue of a dog.
- JUST LOOK AT IT !!!!!
- It'll keep out bad mojo.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Where the fuck are you moving to that
you regularly expect people out of their heads on ketamine to be passing your front door?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:24, Reply)

Better safe than sorry

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:25, Reply)

He's moving onto Barry's road.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:54, Reply)

It wouldn't really suit a modern abode like yours petal.

( girlinthehole, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:07, Reply)

Or indeed any abode outside the 'Labyrinth' set.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)

Or Jim Henson's house.
well, grave.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Oh, it really is from Labyrinth.
I cannot decide whether that makes it better or worse.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:10, Reply)

worse surely, considering the Bowie association

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:12, Reply)

I'll put it on the front door, it'll only be seen by people who walk in rather than in the flat.
And it'll keep out all the bad mojo.

I need 3 door knobs for my waldrobe, I'm thinking as I have a chanderlear in my bedroom, something victorian-looking and silver.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:12, Reply)

If you buy that door knocker,
you'll only need to get two knobs, because you will be a massive one yourself.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:13, Reply)

hahaha!

( girlinthehole, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:15, Reply)

You mong, I like them, I'm going for it when I get paid at midnight.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Who pays you at Midnight, Fagin?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Is this a jew joke?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:22, Reply)

No, more the shady underworld of London joke.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:29, Reply)

^ Kojak's rejected 'first draft' catchphrase

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:41, Reply)

^My best post ever

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:46, Reply)

It's the worst thing I've seen today
and I saw a dog eating a tramp's turd on the way to work
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:21, Reply)

Hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:23, Reply)

Don't do it Gonz.
I cannot even start to tell you how shit that is.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Dude it's 'fully functioning'
and made from resin



and has bronze effect highlights
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:12, Reply)

I assume he is back on the morphine

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:13, Reply)

He definitely seems to have gone all blooty.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)