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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Where the white girls be at?
Bank holiday weekend this weekend, doing anything good?
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:07, 168 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
One white girl, right here.
Nuthin doin this weekend, i shouldn't think. Nothing special, anyway.

You know a thing or two, Gonz. Could you recommend a piss-easy illustrator tutorial thingy? I've just installed it and it's just different enough from Photoshop that I can't separate my arse from my elbow when it comes to creating stuff.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:10, Reply)
I'm afraid I don't use Illustrator, but whenever I need some design tips, there are a few places I go.
- www.smashingmagazine.com
- www.noupe.com/
- www.smashingapps.com/
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:18, Reply)
Thanks Gonz.
i'll have a look at them later.
I'm a little too fraught right now. I think I probably need to chill the fuck out.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:24, Reply)
easier said than done
I need to get boxes and make lists of people to notify of my address change and figure out when to cancel the bills and and and
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:26, Reply)
At the moment I don't know whether to cry or fall asleep.
I'm currently going with 'watching shit telly'.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:36, Reply)
Oh my lovely, whazup?
Just remember, everything always works out in the end, no matter what happens.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:39, Reply)
I'm just tired and stressed.
And getting very cross with illustrator being a pain and not doing what I want it to do.
I'm going to watch Spartacus in a bit. Hopefully a load of shagging, swearing and oiled-up fighting will make me feel a bit better.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:55, Reply)
OMG
Someone at work has been getting me to watch it, and I dismissed it but after LOVING Game of Thones I think I might like that too.

Are you watching the First Season or the Second Season with the prequal?
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:00, Reply)
This is teh third season.
Chronologically it goes season 2, season 1, season 3.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:02, Reply)
What way do you reckon I should watch them? I got Blood'n'sand and Gods of the Arena..

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:04, Reply)
i think that's the right order to watch them.
Then vengeance, which is the third season.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:05, Reply)
Sweet !

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:11, Reply)
So it's Star Wars
Without being in space.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:04, Reply)
As far as I remember
there wasn't an awful lot of bouncing cock in Star Wars.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:06, Reply)
Easter egg hunt for the kids
Hot cross bun beer for the adults.
Some white girls, some brown girls.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:34, Reply)
Woh', hot cross bun BEER?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:42, Reply)
From Morrisons
It's quite tasty.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:44, Reply)
Sounds alright.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:04, Reply)

real-ale-reviews.com/morrisons-hot-cross-ale/2010/11/
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:12, Reply)
I'm so white I'm almost blue
except when I'm red.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:47, Reply)
^this
Comes with being Scottish.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:49, Reply)
Or Welsh

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:54, Reply)
or viking

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:56, Reply)
That'll be my lot.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:58, Reply)
I'm listening to a record in your language right now.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:01, Reply)
Is it 'Donald where's ya troosers?'

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:03, Reply)
It is not
Mile Marbhphaisg air a Ghaol is the name of the track.
Oh we're back into English for the next track. Still banging on about Lairds though.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:06, Reply)
ni' night peeps and hobbits. I's off to bed.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 21:59, Reply)
night
that's a bit early
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:19, Reply)
I'm back from exercising.
Not sure what to do this weekend, I have a couple of weekend away options, but I've got a lot on this month, so I need to be sensible.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:02, Reply)
Where has being sensible ever got you, eh?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:08, Reply)
I don't know yet.
Being reckless got me nowhere. Maybe sensible will get me nowhere but at a more sedate pace.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:11, Reply)
Doesn't sound as much fun.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:18, Reply)
It'll probably be cheaper and less painful

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Bloody 'ell Jeff, I bet there are bulls saying they make love like a jeff, what with all the exersizing you're on.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:11, Reply)
I just had a bit of a cycle
And a go on the cross trainer whilst watching the football. I'm only trying to get fit. Not run a marathon or anything.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)
Do you pay a lot for your gym?
I'm wondering if I can get the GP to prescribe it to me or something like that, it ain't cheap, when in reality, it should be.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
I'm too tight to pay Fitness First forty quid a month.
So I pay eighteen quid a month to use some council funded place. The advantages are.

1. It's cheap
2. It has a swimming pool
3. A lot of people there are NHS referals, so it isn't remotely competitive
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
Sweet, there is one not far from me in my new yard.
about 10-15 minutes on the bus or a 30 min walk. You got me thinkin', gonna get off a stop early from work and walk that bit.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
I won't stick at it.
I know that.

Also, the other advantage with the council one, is that there is no 12 month contract.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
i went swimming
but i think you are outdoing me on exercise
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:20, Reply)
I'm doing little and often.
Rather than having bit 'workouts'
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:26, Reply)
Third wedding anniversary on Sunday.
We shall be celebrating by going to a mate's surprise 50th birthday party.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:06, Reply)
*shakes head*
Why didn't you speak to me first.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:07, Reply)
About what, tangles?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:08, Reply)
Got your email mate
I'll have a proper gander soon.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:15, Reply)
Might I assume you also got my message?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:19, Reply)
I did.
I've been on my phone all day, but I've just fired up my laptop so I can address my many gazzed messages and e-mails from well wishers.

You'll be getting a reply soon.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:24, Reply)
Perhaps you could employ b3th as your PA?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:26, Reply)
That won't work.
One of my many well wishers is b3th.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
i could tell myself that you'll get back to me later

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Or, if you're going to do the PA role properly.
You could tell yourself that you'll be getting back to yourself later.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Do you think you'll fob yourself off as easily as that?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:36, Reply)
furiously.
On a nightly basis.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
haha

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)
Well it passes the time while waiting for a response

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)
Your message is important to us.
We'll get back to you shortly. Whilst waiting, why not wank yourself raw.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)
Don't mind if I do.
Thank you very much.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:44, Reply)
Knock yourself out.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:48, Reply)
Hey b3th.
Given you've been self employed for some time, and given that you are happy working in WsM - have you considered buying a local business?

uk.businessesforsale.com/uk/search/Businesses-for-sale-in-Weston-super-Mare
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:49, Reply)
Been there, done that.
Died on my arse.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:56, Reply)
What did you have?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:57, Reply)
My friend and I opened a shop.
lasted about six months. i came out of it like Monty's poor cousin.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:00, Reply)
What did you retail - and what went wrong?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:01, Reply)
She was an alternative health therapist
and I sold lush-type soaps etc that I made myself.

I can't be doing with that kind of stress again.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:04, Reply)
I can understand that.
Do you still make soaps? I'm just wondering if there is a web-shop in it.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:06, Reply)
i still have the kit
but I haven't made anything for a few years.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:08, Reply)
Make some
Send a few out to the ladies of OT, get honest feedback - and if they'd buy it, you've got a potential market.

Get Gonz to build you a website, get Battered to do the marketing and get me to be an all round genuis.

PROFIT!
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
That would be lovely
but I can't keep begging you lot for help. You've all got better things to do than help me out.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:11, Reply)
You've got a good mix of people here.
From students to execs.

Find out - if they'd buy it, how much they'd spend on it (and about 50 other things) and take it from there.

Absolutely nothing to lose. Given you are already in the mail order space.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
I'd be well up for it, if you are serious about it, even do it for a cut.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
it's certainly something to think about...

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:22, Reply)
Give it some thought over the next 24 hours
And if you keep coming back to it, let me know.

I can pull some documentation uptogether for you before JeffSTOCK and we can discuss then.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:23, Reply)
'kay.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:27, Reply)
See you on the left?

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:28, Reply)
Haha, KAPLOWIE.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
Cheers Jeff.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:23, Reply)
Sorry, common reaction in my family...
After my dad married my mum he was telling a bloke he worked with that he had just got married, to which the man responded "Why didn't you come and see me first?"
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:15, Reply)
Ah, I see.
I've done it twice now. The first time was a test run.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)
As a wise man once told me:
Anyone who gets married for a second time didn't deserve to lose the first one.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
I certainly fucking didn't.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
I love the idea of someone saying "Why didn't you come and see me first? I got a lovely sister, she's from good stock, her coat has a great shine to it, could have sorted you out a deal"

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
I think his point was more that he would have advised against marriage in general.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:34, Reply)
I wonder, in the history of mankind, if anyone has ever changed their mind about proposing to someone, purley on the word of friends and family.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
A great shine on her coat, eh...

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:34, Reply)
Oh lovely ! What is the third annervsery thinggy? Saphire or Ruby or A Slip Of The Finger or something like that.... I always forget.
Sounds like a good time =)
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
I can't remember. I'll have to Google it.

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:06, Reply)
Apparently it's leather, crystal or glass, giftwise...

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:28, Reply)
7 is seperation.
I know that.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:38, Reply)
It was for me, too.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
Just looking at your e-mail.
I think I can make some suggestions!

I'll do the job properly, rather than speculating in part on here. I'm going to be out for the next two night, but unless I go away over the weekend, I'll pick it up then!
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)
OK, thanks mate.
Any thoughts appreciated.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Left it is

(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:31, Reply)
This might have legs you know b3th.
But only if tomorrow and wednesday it comes back into your mind without you thinking too much about it. You'll know if it's a good idea as it'll be the one thing you keep coming back to.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:32, Reply)
I'll certainly bear it in mind.
See what develops.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:36, Reply)
Exactly.
I can - if you decide to go with it - give some thought to your business plan and consider how proof of concept might be best achieved.
(, Mon 2 Apr 2012, 23:38, Reply)
That would be cool.
We could have a b3ta co-op.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
No.
If you're going to do this, you need to do it on your own. Too many small businesses fail because of too much input.

Take all the help you need getting started, and then work like a madman making it work.

Once you've agreed a route to market with anyone you think might be able to help, thank them, then go for it. If you make a million - fantastic. Your hard work has paid off. If you make nothing, well at least you tried.

If you make a hundred grand and 4 other people are all 'well, I said 'do this' and you were going to 'do that' so I want 'x' not 'y' it'll never work.

You do the 9-5, you take the wage.

The End.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
I've done the whole working with friends thing.
It doesn't end well.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)
Exactly.
If you've got the offer of help, take it. It's an offer.

But working for yourself isn't 'working for yourself with half a dozen people having an opinion' - by all means ask for suggestions and advice, those without a vested interest are more likely to give you an honest opinion, rather than working to an agenda.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:08, Reply)
I'm always grateful for offers of help
But past experiences have seen offers become very conditional when it comes down to it.
In fact, if I was the sort of person who could 'go for it' and make a million, you'd think I would have already done it, wouldn't you?

I sometimes feel I'm one of life's terminal under achievers.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:11, Reply)
Snap out of that.
I'm a firm believer in 'right, where do I want to be and how do I get there?'

You've learnt from what didn't work and now is the time to make something work. Nicely packages homemade soaps sounds like the sort of thing that would sell. Why wouldn't youts?

Help that comes with conditions (other than a pint) isn't help. It a sales pitch.

You've only failed to achieve what you want from life because you've yet to exploit the thing that will help you reach your goals - but your goals should be ever changing. If you want to earn twenty grand a year, the moment that comes close, you need to be thinking, 'right, how can I earn thirty grand' and so on.

Tell ya, when it comes to (trying to) make money, I'm a ruthless cunt.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:18, Reply)
To be honest,
I've changed so much in the last few years that there's no reason to expect the same old results again. I just have self belief problems still.
There is an idea that I keep coming back to and it always seems halfway feasible, so that might bear some working on. Once I get back on my laptop tomorrow I'll write something down.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
Keep me posted b3th!
Anything I can add, I'll gladly pitch in with.

Got your cider shoes ready for later this month?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
I have a natty new ensemble which just happens to be in patriotic red white and blue
So hopefully I won't get shanked for not being English.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:28, Reply)
haha!
New outfit for the occasion eh. I hope Mr b3th doesn't get jealous. Especially if Gonz makes it!
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:29, Reply)
Are you kidding me?
He gets jealous if I talk to the barman!

Mind you, that might be because he makes no secret of letching at me. And of course I am unbelievably attractive...
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:32, Reply)
:-)

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:35, Reply)
I'm hoping when he comes to pick me up,i can get him to come in and say hello to people.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:36, Reply)
He can have the final pop-shot in the b3th bukkake.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:37, Reply)
Is that like pin the tail on the donkey?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
Jizzing over donkeys is wrong b3th.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:41, Reply)
Not in Weston.
It's practically a local sport.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:42, Reply)
And you wonder why Pier Bash ii wasn't a instant hit?!?!?!?!

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:48, Reply)
I've got new shoes for the occasion
I just hope it's relatively warm and sunny else what I'm planning to wear is going to look a bit daft.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:32, Reply)
Me too!
Also, hello berk.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)
'ning B3th :)

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
How was your pizza?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:34, Reply)
Good ta
the ice cream was good also.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
Ice cram its always good

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
Stupid fucking phone spelling

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:40, Reply)
That sounds like a 1500 meter runner on a cold day.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:42, Reply)
Well, tell me about your toppings!
And your ice cream.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:42, Reply)
there was one with a lot of meat and olives on
and one with a lot of cheese on. And I had pistachio and hazelnut gelato. Om nom nom.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:44, Reply)
Olives are wrong. Just so you know.
But then, I think jizzing on donkeys is acceptable, so what the fuck do I know?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:46, Reply)
black olives are nice
green ones...meh.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:53, Reply)
Om nom nom
Makes it sound like you dined with Gonz!

Glad to hear that your trip to the capital was (so it appears) a worthwhile exercise.

And I'll be sure to comment on your fine new shoes and b3th new outfit on the cider boat!

You must be monster excited about this masters?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:46, Reply)
Who doesn't love a golf tournament?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:48, Reply)
The handicapped.
They get a low number which puts them at a further disadvantage.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:49, Reply)
I got a very high number at the last golf I played.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:50, Reply)
Without cheating, you'd still be on the 5th hole.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:50, Reply)
Any hole's a goal

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:51, Reply)
Left?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:53, Reply)
I will be monster excited when I have a formal 'yes'
until I've got that clutched in my sweaty wee palms I'm not getting overexcited.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:51, Reply)
Wise berk
Less wise is me telling you I read 'palms' as 'pants' and thought... 'Maybe you need some sort of liner'.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:53, Reply)
gross.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:54, Reply)
Sorry berk.
See you on the left in a bit.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:55, Reply)
Mr b3th currently has 800 gusseted envelopes he's trying to flog.
Every time he says the word gusset I collapse into giggles.
I am such a grown up.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:56, Reply)
Has he suggested wiping them on your quim to speed up the postal sealing process?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:58, Reply)
Ewwwwwwwwwewww

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:59, Reply)
Also, can you imagine the paper cuts?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 1:01, Reply)
It brings a whole new meaning to
the phrase, 'I'm got a parcel coming'
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 1:01, Reply)
You're a bad, bad man.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 1:02, Reply)
Left.
But not for long. I need my beauty sleep.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:55, Reply)
How much sleep do you usually get?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:56, Reply)
Not anywhere near enough.
I'm constantly tired. I fall asleep sometimes in the afternoons. Then I can't sleep at night. My doctor says it's just one of the many fun symptoms of depression.
Yay.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 0:58, Reply)
In the average day.
How much snooze do you get?

I can go from 14 hour sleeps to functioning on 4 hours for a month or so.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 1:02, Reply)
Most days nothing.
Sometimes half an hour, sometimes I can be home for two or three hours.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 1:04, Reply)
You need to try and get into a routine of going to bed at a sensible hour
And fixing your 'wake up' point, eventually it'll help you.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 1:06, Reply)

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