Hi there gang!!!!
I have to be SOLELY RESPONSIBLE for cooking a meal for a ghastly 'vegetarian' this evening and am asking you, the internet, for any cheap-ass but tasty dishes that you can recommend.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:34, 15 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

I'm going to sit back to watch the lolarious responses this gets...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:35, Reply)

Chicken wings, fuck em.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:35, Reply)

supernoodles

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:35, Reply)

Easy. Mushroom risotto.
Goats cheese and tomato tart.
Vegatarian Lasagne
Stir fry
Asparagus and fried potato omlette
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:35, Reply)

Eggplant soup
ratatouille
quinoa and bean stew
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)

Eggs come from chickens silly

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:40, Reply)

But they're not meat. I'm not a fucking vegan, I'm a vegetarian.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:41, Reply)

THANKS IN ADVANCE!!! ;p

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:35, Reply)

Chicken
Or FISH
( Kroney, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:35, Reply)

They're both meats dickhead.
*vegetarian speaking*
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)

Everybody knows that chicken and fish are OK for vegetarians.
DUH.
( Kroney, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:37, Reply)

And cows

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

I think you're confusing them with Muslims

(PsychoChomp, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

Cows dont wear burqas

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)

I HAD A VEGETARIAN FISH LUNCH

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

Fish are the vegetables of the briny deep!

( Kroney, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

PREZACTLY

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)

No they fucking aren't.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:40, Reply)

It was pretty much a vegan lunch if I'm being honest

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:41, Reply)

DOn't worry about it, even if it all goes wrong, you can't be blamed as it clearly wouldn't all be your fault.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)

Chickpea curry, with spinach and shit

(PsychoChomp, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)

I may do my dal and a mixed veg curry
as I can pretty much rustle that up with only the purchase of some coriander.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

IM PRETTY AWESOME YEAH!

(PsychoChomp, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

That sounds suitable and delicious.
do that.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)

Twigs and grass
Veggies love natural food.
( Peej, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)

A decent veg soup to start with good bread
Sweet potato, boiled until soft. Mix with cooked red onion, cheese, peas, an egg and a touch of flour then fluff up the top and bake in the oven. I think a touch of chilli in there would work wonders.

A veg lasagne with spinach/green beans?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:37, Reply)

SOup and a bowl of sweet potato?
I wouldn't be impressed with that.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

It comes out rather like lasagne
and you could have it with side dishes
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:40, Reply)

I am a Scottish vegetarian.
Gaz me your budget.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:37, Reply)

Is your answer going to be neeps and tatties, whatever his budget it?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

ahaha it totally will be.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)

Is skag vegetarian?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)

Poppies innit

(PsychoChomp, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:41, Reply)

Irn Bru soup and a fight.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:41, Reply)

Irn Bru is excellent stuff.
Most Jockanese grub is.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:42, Reply)

Deep-fried Mars Bars are braw
as long as they're in VEGETABLE OIL, pal
( Kroney, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:43, Reply)

Tomato and oinion tart - piss easy
www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/1336/tomato-and-caramelised-onion-tart-tatin
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

I had that tonight!
plus with goats cheese. it was fucking GORGEOUS.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)

Actually its' really good with some pancetta on top

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:43, Reply)

Not a fan of pancetta.
I've tried it, so as to avoid the whole "oh you don't like it cos you've never had it" shit. Just find it a bit crap.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:46, Reply)

you are aware it is meat, right?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:48, Reply)

I am a vegetarian in the fact that I don't LIKE meat - not because I believe that killing animals to eat them is wrong.
if it's something new and I haven't had it before, I'll try it.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:51, Reply)

Puree these 5 with a Curly Wurly.
www.lovefood.com/journal/opinions/16143/the-cruellest-foods-we-eat-lobster

Then tell them after they've eaten it.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:42, Reply)

To be fair, if it's white meat, it's alright.
They'll only make a fuss if it's proper meat, like beef and lamb. Nobody calls chickens things like Bluebell, so they don't care about them.
( Kroney, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:42, Reply)

It's NOT fucking alright!
I have pet chickens at home! I'd never eat one of them.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:44, Reply)

I would

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:44, Reply)

Do you eat their periods though?

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:45, Reply)

Chicken periods? totally do.
They're essential in cakes.

I like cakes.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 13:48, Reply)

Same as everytime - Butternut Squash and Chilli soup
Take a large squash, top and tail it, slice it in half lengthways, and scoop out the seeds. Put peppercorns, salt, garlic, cumin, a chopped chilli, and some oil into your mortar and pestle, give it a bit of a grind, then dollop that over the flesh of the squash. Roast until the flesh is soft enough to be scooped out with a spoon. This can take up to an hour, and some parts will soften slower than others, so patience is key.

As the squash approaches the time you'll remove it from the oven, soften onions and a red pepper in a pan, before adding the softened squash, and add some stock (vegetable or chicken, your choice). Add another chilli (if you so desire), season to taste, then blend it in the pan. I add a little chilli powder at the end, just to give it a little more strength, but this isn't essential.

I use standard red chillis for this, but you can use stronger ones if you like. I attempted a scotch bonnet one time, and hugely regretted it.

It keeps well, and makes several portions.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 14:07, Reply)