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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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what's the worst crime against humanity that you can think of?
i was going to say paedos, but i think it has to be double dipping or people who dunk bread in soup/biscuits in tea.

alt: my new sparkly jumper arrived. it is far too big and i look like the black snowman in it. i am far too lazy to send it back, so i will end up wearing it anyway. which looks worse, clothes that are too big or clothes that are too small??

altalt: just been reading at the school we support. the little bastard next to me kept doing rancid farts. he called them "windies". what do you call it?
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:42, 97 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Dunking bread in soup and biscuits in tea is fucking excellent, you DUNKWRONG
Alt:
Too small. Gunts and Pirellis should not be seen
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:44, Reply)
Gays. They're a fucking abomination.
Altalt: I rather like 'stepped on a duck'
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:45, Reply)
+d

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:46, Reply)
Nice work
/ac
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:49, Reply)
You're going to have to explain this

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:20, Reply)
Gays. They're a fucking abdomination.
Tenuous, but not bad for Friday afternoon.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:40, Reply)
i was wondering what euphemism people teach their kids
my brother's kids say "pop"
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:54, Reply)
We debated this and settled on 'trump'

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:56, Reply)
my friend has taught her kid to say "traf"

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:21, Reply)
Wearing a Greggs hat.
Altalt: grunt.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:47, Reply)
God I haven't heard that term for a good 20 years.
'guff' is a good one too.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:49, Reply)
Dunking bread in soup is fucking mandatory. Call yourself a northerner? FFS.
Alt: Too big OR too small looks fucking ridiculous. Send the fucker back and get the smaller size FFS.

AltAlt:
A trumpet involuntary
An anal announcement
Sounding the last post on the botty bugle
etc.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:48, Reply)
IT'S REVEREND FISTER EVERYONE!!!!!!

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:49, Reply)
*studio applause*
HI MONTY!
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:50, Reply)
HOW'Z IT HANGIN, BRO????

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:51, Reply)
You know what they say - there's always someone worse off than you.
I intend to find the chap and buy him a pint.

So how're you? I see you have more mental-ex shenanigans ahead of you this weekend. Give her a kick in the cunt from me, would you? Thnx x
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:53, Reply)
Will do, boss.
A fucking INSPECTION would you believe?
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:55, Reply)
The cheeky fucking mare.
And how in the name of Dolland and fucking Aitchison will she be able to inspect anything with her dodgy eyesight?
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:56, Reply)
It's an excuse to pry and to make up spurious objections to my kid staying over.
An exercise in nosey cuntishness.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:59, Reply)
I see.
I sincerely hope that she doesn't trip over anything on the stairs up to your flat and plummet to her death. That would be dreadful.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:02, Reply)
It'd be a shame if she received 240v when she rang the doorbell due to a wiring mistake.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:05, Reply)
It really would.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:07, Reply)
Do you need to borrow some wirecutters?

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:11, Reply)
Yes please

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:11, Reply)
A tragedy.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:07, Reply)
Heh.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Dunking is excellent
Not indicating on roundabouts, that's proper criminal.
alt : Too small is usually worse

altalt : SBD's
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:48, Reply)
Some idiots used to get it wrong and call them SBVs at my school.
So I bullied them and then they committed suicide twenty alcohol-sodden years later. It's only fair I think.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:51, Reply)
It would have been fairer if they had been raped too.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:52, Reply)
(by Captain Placid)

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:52, Reply)
Damn right
Any fule no that SBV is the vehicle Captain Scarlet drove.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:55, Reply)
Actually that was an SPV. *snorts, pushes glasses back up nose*

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:07, Reply)
I NO!
I was merely making a deliberate mistake for comic effect.
*tch *
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:12, Reply)
HILARIOUS!!!

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:20, Reply)
People who fuck off at 3pm on a Friday afternoon, when everyone else is still stuck at work for a couple of hours.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:51, Reply)
Bye then

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:53, Reply)
See ya

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:53, Reply)
how very anti-semitic

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:53, Reply)
I'm not Jewish.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:53, Reply)
Funnily enough, I haven't seen any Jews in Poland. I wonder what happened to them all?

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:54, Reply)
some national holiday between 1939-1945
a lot of them never came back
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:55, Reply)
They've gone on a camping trip

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:56, Reply)
I am leaving the office in 37 minutes to drink beer.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:53, Reply)
I hate you even more than usual

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:56, Reply)
That's a whole lot of hate.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:57, Reply)
Led Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:58, Reply)
I set them up...

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:58, Reply)
Yeah but he's in Jonny Foreign land
Which means it's actually 11:57pm local time.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:58, Reply)
One hour time difference.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:58, Reply)
+ 5 hours by tractor to the airport
get checked into cattle class with Ryanair, fly around Europe for 5 hours stopping off at all airports on the way (more time to sell lottery scratchcards, obviously) and then find your way home from the field in Wiltshire where they eventually land.

I am close?
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:01, Reply)
Scarily accurate.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:04, Reply)
The foreign prick

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 14:58, Reply)
What's wrong with soup dunking? Long as it's not biscuits.
I think any form of child/animal abuse is abhorrent. You have to be unhinged to take pleasure in hurting either.

im shit at taking stuff back, mainly die to laziness. if something doesn't fit I make it or give it to charity.

Clothes that are too small are worse. people will think you've gained weight, rather than lost it
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:04, Reply)
Clearly you've never dunked a dark chocolate digestive in French Onion Soup

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:17, Reply)
Why does it have to be French onions?
Why not German? You never hear about Spanish Onion soup. Fucking racist is what it is.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:19, Reply)
You have to use the softest ones, they yield the quickest.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:26, Reply)
dunking is fucking wrong
YOU ARE ALL WRONG, ALL OF YOU, STOP THE DUNKING MADNESS, IT MUST END HERE.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:24, Reply)
We should all bring dips and big sharing bags of crisps to the pizza bash
and double dip right in front of you.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:04, Reply)
I will do this.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:06, Reply)
I'm just going to flake out.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:13, Reply)
you will both be ejected and made to eat in the hall

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:24, Reply)
Is that a euphemism ?

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:27, Reply)
whatever they want it to be
they're a dirty pair of lickers, those two
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:41, Reply)
Wait a minute...has Swipey posted and then fucked off?
Well that's just plain rude.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:09, Reply)
Fucking bang out of order, Rev.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:12, Reply)
17 minutes until my first beer.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:13, Reply)

b qu
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:13, Reply)
The first one won't even touch the sides

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:21, Reply)
6

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:24, Reply)
i'm here!

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:20, Reply)
Oh look, the fat northern tart's back.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:22, Reply)
silly battered
that's a MIRROR
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:23, Reply)
Did someone buy Friday cakes or something?

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:44, Reply)
no, i had a telecon about a terminal dilapidations claim...

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:47, Reply)
I dunno
there's a lot of them, abuse in general I reckon
alt clothes too big, they really make you look bigger than you are
altalt pootitoots
only because my cousins kids say it
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:37, Reply)
pootitoots?
hahahaha

is echo guilty of pootitoots? i never believe that dogs fart, i always blame the owner
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:42, Reply)
FOOLISH MISTAKE
Echos ass is RANK
I'm telling you omfg her ass is nasty, you can hear her fart, and it's terrible I mean terrible
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:44, Reply)
hilarious
does she bark at it when she farts? or does she ignore it?
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:46, Reply)
naw, sometimes she looks like "what was that?" other times she looks ashamed
usually she just crop dusts you
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:50, Reply)
I HAVE A VIDEO FOR YOU

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:53, Reply)
Swipey! Swipey!
This may be the greatest thing ever - lose weight eating nothing but chips!

freetheanimal.com/2012/11/the-hash-browns-potato-diet-for-rapid-weight-and-fat-loss.html
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:45, Reply)
what the actual fuck?
he will DIE
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:47, Reply)
The Irish seemed to cope ok on just potatoes
until the potatoes ran out, of course.

They do appear to have pretty much everything you need, with perhaps a small amount of supplements.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:55, Reply)
QI said as much. You genuinely can live on nothing but potatoes and they're almost unique for that.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:19, Reply)
Being Naked Ape.
Alt: Too small

AltAlt: Air poo.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:49, Reply)
being 'Swipe
Alt: clothes which are too small

Alt alt: windypops
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 15:52, Reply)
This beer is ace.
*slurps*
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:01, Reply)
You, on the other hand, are a colossal bender.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:07, Reply)
Who is drinking beer whilst you are sat at your desk.

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:14, Reply)
Lots of people, many of whom are colossal benders.
You, for one.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:16, Reply)
* orders another pint *

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:17, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1784877
(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:12, Reply)
Hahaha very good, Lokesy

(, Fri 16 Nov 2012, 16:14, Reply)

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