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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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i.imgur.com/IGR3z.jpg

Edit: Oh, bollocks, sorry, wasn't meant to do that. Well, while we're here, uh, how about the icy roads? Can you drive safely and sensible, or are you one of the dickheads in the inevitable YouTube winter fail compilation.

Alt. I'm buying a van, any reccomendations?

Altalt: fine, if you don't drive, how are the buses for you?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:31, 147 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
yet more racism.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:32, Reply)
That shit is str8 dope, yo.
The second 'rhyme' in particular.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:33, Reply)
Lolz

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:33, Reply)
I can't even drive.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:34, Reply)
*no-drive five*

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:35, Reply)
why have you never bothered with it?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:36, Reply)
My answer is that I've lived in central London since I was 18
and prior to that I lived in the centre of Winchester and only ventured out of it for festivals and raves, and no fucking way was I going to be the mug driving back from those suckers. I can say, hand on heart, I have wished I had a car and could drive on less than about five occasions ever.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:37, Reply)
Learn anyway,
At least then if you do ever go on holiday, or want to take your daughter to legoland or props pig world or her first rave, you can hire a car.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:39, Reply)
The 'being a parent' thing is pretty much the only reason I might ever need to,
but there's no way on earth I can afford to learn for the next five years anyway.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:40, Reply)
20 quid a week?
Stop drinking and you're sorted.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:42, Reply)
I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:43, Reply)
The cost of running a car to the use I'd get out of it is tiny.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:37, Reply)
fair enough.
I only started driving last year, and I tell you it was the best thing I ever did.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:38, Reply)
A van?!
Damn!

Erm ... as our American friends would say, "I got nuttin."

Altalt: I don't use the 'buses. The tube is my form of transport, and it's lovely and toasty (if smelly) on these cold winter nights.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:36, Reply)
Well, thanks for posting anyway.
I'm pretty easy going in my threads, I'm happy for you to start a sub-thread if none of the above subjects are within your scope.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:37, Reply)
I don't drive, for pretty well exactly what Monty said above, except near Bath instead of Winchester.
But thanks, I'll take that on board should I ever want to start a sub thread in one of your threads.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:46, Reply)
vanilla vice.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:38, Reply)
Altalt: where I am, the public transport links are off da hook, blud.
I have tube, two different overground lines and buses to London Bridge, Liverpool St, Waterloo and the middle of town all within a couple of minutes walk of my front door.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:43, Reply)
Yeah?
Well I am near 4 stations with 4 train lines, the DLR, one tube line is close-ish and more busses than you can shake an African cleaner at.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:46, Reply)
Yeah?
Well I can fly and my dad was a world famous martial artist and actor AND I can spell 'buses' so HA. SUSSED.

ssssssssssssssssssss
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:48, Reply)
They have attached the exhaust to the bus and I feel a little groggy.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:49, Reply)
Groggy?

Grooby Grooby Groooooooo!
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:50, Reply)
*meddles with kids*
/savile
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:01, Reply)
i also have 3 tube lines within a 10 min walk and a 4th within a 15 min walk
an overland and a bus station.

but you know what? public transport is full of PUBLIC. and you and i both know that is NOT a GOOD THING.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:57, Reply)
This is so.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:58, Reply)
smelly ugly sniffing loud twitching fat cunts getting right in the way
public transport would be great if it were empty
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:05, Reply)
Add me to the no-car posse
Same reasons (more of less) as monty. have considered learning and doing the hire car thing, but I can't imagine I'd be safe ion the roads if I were to take my test and then not get in a car for a yea, as would liklely be the case.

Edit:
Alt: buses are shit, but they are still cheaper than a car and are the least worst option when I can't or don't want to ride my bike.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:45, Reply)
I hear ya, Wilfred.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:46, Reply)
FUCKING. BENDERS.
Your kids probably have the only Dads who can't drive.

For shame, chaps. For shame.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:47, Reply)
lols

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:48, Reply)
owning a car when you live in london is a mug's game
bicycles or public transport are more practical and faster 90% of the time.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:48, Reply)
Buses aren't faster
unless you use them at 5am. With all the other cleaners.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:52, Reply)
my bike is faster in any kind of traffic and being as I commute to central london in the rush hour this is what matters.
buses are slower, but not by massive amounts for my journey, but shit loads cheaper, especially if you factor in parking.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:07, Reply)
I agree,
But what about going to weddings of friends in nice country hotels, or taking the wi,fe out for a picnic in the new forest, or just popping down to the coast for the hell of it? Or getting a car on holiday and visiting remote ruins and coming across awesome little cafes in the woods, or getting a Christmas tree slightly too big for your house?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:53, Reply)
trains, lifts, taxis
I also don't do most of those things. it would be nice to have a car maybe 4-5 times a year, but that is not worth the cost of the insurance tax etc.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:08, Reply)
And there is a massive difference between not owning a car and
NOT BEING ABLE TO DRIVE LIKE ALL THE OTHER ADULTS.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:53, Reply)
fuck i clicked this
it's not that i don't agree, i just fundamentally disagree with clicking anything you post :(
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:56, Reply)
Chz bbz.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:59, Reply)
first "i like this" of the year for you, wasn't it?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
As explained, would learn and then hire cars, but I'd be bloody dangerous due to only driving 4-5 times a year
so, no basically.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:09, Reply)
you'd be surprised how empowering and fun it is
i did not want to learn to drive as a teenager, i thought i'd rather have the cash. then daddy swipe was persuaded to buy me an old beetle. amazing. i have always loved driving ever since. it's so much fun.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:11, Reply)
Oh, I Get that
when I first had my bike it was kinda the same. but as there is no way in hell I could afford it it's academic. if you have the money for that kinda luxury, more power to you, but even if I did i'd find elventy better things to spend it on, getting a bigger flat for a start, or one by the river, that' be nice.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:19, Reply)
no it isn't
it's a choice. you don't have to use it. but it gives you massive amounts of freedom to head out anywhere you want, or to bring shopping home easily, or in my case to volunteer for charity and take lonely old people to tea parties once every couple of months. although i do feel a bit mean about the choice of car, making 80 year olds limbo dance into my low-slung crumpet-catcher is a bit rodney.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:55, Reply)
yes, it's a coice, which in my opinion is generally made by mugs.
although I will add a sub-clause for people whe are ritch enough to afford the car, tax, insurand and parking. I am far from being one of these people. so it's not a realistic choise for me coz I is a povvo.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:11, Reply)
fair enough, that does make the idea suck
mine is about £500 a month for the car loan, £120 for the insurance, i forget the tax but it's about £200 a year i think, parking is also £200 a year, then there's the petrol...

fuck.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:13, Reply)
Swipey sorry to go off on a tangent
How up to date are you on perfumes?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:15, Reply)
very
why, are you saying i smell?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:24, Reply)
No I'm not that brave
Whats your veiw on YSL's Manifesto and Thierry Muglar's Alien?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:25, Reply)
they are ok, but a little bit too heavy for my own personal tastes
but i like very light, usually citrussy scents. jo malone lime, basil and mandarin or red roses are the best 2 i've ever found. and they do matching candles or body creams etc for extra bonus points from your mrs. or mum. depending on what you're into.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:29, Reply)
Damn I should have spoken to you earlier
Ohhhhhhh well thats what shes got now
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:30, Reply)
meh i'm sure she'll like it
anyway, if you keep the package sealed, they will return it if she knows it and dislikes it. clearly this doesn't work if she squirts first.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:34, Reply)
I honestly couldn’t tell what to get I find perfume stores way to over powering
And why the fuck is soap and glory stuff so fucking expensive?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:36, Reply)
yeah, and I spent, at most, £100 a month on public transport
If I had that kinda money to spare I'd move somewhere nicer.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:20, Reply)
Not if you have a small child to take around it isn't.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:58, Reply)
I do, some of the time.
public transport works fine for that. see other responses for other reaons.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:11, Reply)
'Buses are also a great way to get to know an area when on holiday.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:00, Reply)
Thank you Judith Chalmers.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:01, Reply)
+ by being stranded in them after the last buses have finished at 8pm cos it's Devon
and the whole county shuts at teatime

/bitter experience
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:01, Reply)
8pm? you've never been to Devon have you.
Night buses start at 4, and finish at 6.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:04, Reply)
PM

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:04, Reply)
Your own fault for going to Devon.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:11, Reply)
Well I know that NOW don't I?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:21, Reply)
Oh great. That's OT broken again.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:46, Reply)

OT my collar bone
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:49, Reply)
As a BMW driver, I dont like ice and snow as it is rear wheel drive
My previous car was an RX-8 which handled icy surfaces like Bambi
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:48, Reply)

BMW driver total gayer
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:51, Reply)
*bums*

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:52, Reply)
I don't drive.
Alt: No

AltAlt: Not too bad round here.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:49, Reply)
this is a shit thread isnt it.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:55, Reply)
It's not the best ever.
I ain't gon' lie.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:57, Reply)
It would help if all you flids had learnt to drive.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:01, Reply)
to be fair
the thought of some of these cunts let loose on the road is terrifying
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
i fucking love my pretty sports car, it's a massive indulgence, but worth it for me
however, being rear wheel drive and low slung and small, it sucks in the ice, and will not be going anywhere until there is no more ice. i'm pretty sensible, had a totally clean licence for 17 years.

alt: fuck it, buy a bugatti instead.

altalt: i love sitting on london buses at night. during the day or if i am driving or walking, i fucking HATE them.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:54, Reply)

london buses massive black cock
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:00, Reply)
+ gay

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:01, Reply)
+hat

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:02, Reply)
+bebbeh

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
oh i hate you all
/stomps
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:04, Reply)
Horray!

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:06, Reply)
i said stomp, not flounce
you rancid festering bogey of a man
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:07, Reply)
You fat northern tart.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:09, Reply)
oh man
i went downstairs for a salad and a cheeky lemon tart. they had totally sold out of lemony goodness. fuck the nasty chocolate and pecan ones, who wants those?

thanks for reminding me of my loss. thanks.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:11, Reply)
My pleasure.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:14, Reply)
So, how come the conditional formatting system in excel 2010 is so different to that in 2003?
Fuckers.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:56, Reply)
Because of high-end muslim benefit cheats.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:58, Reply)
Fucking high end muslim benefit cheat sex gang ray guns.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
Its almost like they had 7 years to think up some changes

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 13:59, Reply)
Some shit changes.
Fucking shit cunts.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
I quite like Office 2010

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
I've only been using it for 24 hours.
The only problem I've found is that teh conditional formatting thing is really hard to understand.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:08, Reply)
Icy Roads
Are generally a piece of cake, you just have to be gentle and plan ahead, I live out in the countryside and it gets very snowy and icy but (as yet) I havent crashed.

Being a tit I got a CLK a couple of years ago and it has given me a few arse twitches in the snow but I quite enjoy the scent of shit on leather.

Vans... If you are after something small a Nemo is a great van
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:02, Reply)
insert hilarious joke about how you find the nemo

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:04, Reply)
Claps (very slowly)

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:05, Reply)
im a boss at driving, my father built and raced cars
It's in our blood
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:02, Reply)
I'd totes let you drive me anywhere you wanted to.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:03, Reply)
Did you have a nasty accident and have bits of the bodywork embedded in you?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:04, Reply)
As an American
You cannot be "boss" at driving, its a well known fact
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:05, Reply)
course she can
she'll just be on the wrong side of the road, is all
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:06, Reply)
As a ladygirl
you cannot be good at driving.


*stereotype lulz*
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:08, Reply)
pfffffffffft
that is all
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:10, Reply)
Queef ?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:19, Reply)
Don't you queef at Bonzo!

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:19, Reply)
Smelt oddly of lentils

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:22, Reply)
any time any place i will take you down
Make sure you bring papers etc
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:10, Reply)
please insert you own jokes
I was going for one about going down and another to do with rolling tabs...
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:12, Reply)
To the non drivers
Without a car how do you entice the children?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:06, Reply)
Sweets and puppies

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:08, Reply)
Mmmmm
Sugar coated labrador
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:09, Reply)
I live near a cracking pet shop,
Nuff said

Wavy lines


Cheers.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:09, Reply)
When you say you want a van, do you mean a campervan or a transit van?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:08, Reply)
A van.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:12, Reply)
Then get a transit van.
they're popular for a reason.

The long wheel base connects are big enough to sleep in the back if required.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:22, Reply)
This is lol
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2246932/Bearded-darts-fan-Nathan-Grindal-ejected-Phil-The-Power-Taylor-match-5-000-strong-crowd-heckle-Jesus-taunts.html
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:10, Reply)
Yes, yes it is

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:14, Reply)
I like the fact that teh people putting on the event had no sympathy that someone who paid money to see the match live
got evicted.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:23, Reply)
"He was causing a problem."
Ummm no he wasn't. He was "having a beard"
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:24, Reply)
So, how does teh conditional formatting thing work in excel 2010
it seems overly complicated.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:26, Reply)
i don't use it sorry.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:33, Reply)
I don't drive since I moved to London
Most fun I ever had was when it snowed, melted, froze and snowed again while I was at work. Driving home in an MGF was terrifying, I did alright but all them other cocks meant it took about 5 hours.

These days I'm entirely tube-carried, with the occasional bus. Still have a licence so I could do that zipcar thing or hire one if needed, but so far I haven't.

Alt: Going to put a mattress in the back, eh? Eh?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:12, Reply)
strikethrough T insert L

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:13, Reply)
'melled'?

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:23, Reply)
yeah, I was trying to figure that one out.
in the end I decided it was probably shit and not worth the effort.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:24, Reply)
i am guessing he was going for lube instead of tube
i am super-smart like that
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:25, Reply)
that is massively shit.
"These days I'm entirely lube-carried,"?

seriously?
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:26, Reply)
Oh he's very serious when it comes to lube.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:27, Reply)
don't ask me, it wasn't my joke

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:29, Reply)
As are all strikethroughs

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:25, Reply)
Icy roads aren't too bad for me
4x4 copes pretty well, it's just the other drivers. Last night, for instance, I was driving on a foggy, icy country road with a guy (in a BMW natch) driving so close if he'd wanted to get any closer to my back end he would've had to buy me dinner.
Alt: Buy big, buy French but take a look at the insurance premiums first.
Altalt: Buses round here are as rare as rocking horse shit six days a week and non-existant on Sundays.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:24, Reply)
He probably thought he was in a young offenders institute and you were a 14 year old girl.
although I realise that's pretty unlikely since you're as ugly as sin.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:31, Reply)
Hi Al!
I've missed you.
(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:35, Reply)
I'm amazed you ever think about anyone other than yourself.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:35, Reply)
There IS a new thread if anyone cares

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:46, Reply)
I care.

(, Wed 12 Dec 2012, 14:48, Reply)

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