Thread number two, who the fuck are you?
Thinking about it, I reckon Santa was taking the piss when he asked Rudolph if he could use his nose so bright to guide the way. However red the poor ol' lush's nose was, it really wasn't going to make an effective headlight.
What have you taken too literally recently?

Alt: Who wants to join in reindeer games anyway? Bet they're well bent.

Altalt: Laugh and call each other names.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:44, 77 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Why is there nothing about the fat blobby woman on TV in this thread?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:49, Reply)

Tangles is basically rubbish at the internet.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:50, Reply)

basically it looks like her fat sister, (not quite as fat, but will do in the circumstances)
beat the kid to death, and then persuaded the fat sister to take the blame.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:53, Reply)

Yeah I'm definitely shit today.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:56, Reply)

You and me both pal

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:58, Reply)

Same as usual then !!!! hahahahah!!!!111!!!!!

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:01, Reply)

Stop bullying b3th.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:50, Reply)

I swear man, I'd so do a porno with the cast of Loose Women
I'd need another couple guys though, its a 3 man job, who's with me?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:01, Reply)

Have you taken too much of your medication this morning?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:02, Reply)

Not enough if he's taking on the Loose Women.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:05, Reply)

Alright?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:06, Reply)

Spiffing actually.
I haven't had a drink since I saw Monty on Friday night.

Feels good! Got a lunch though.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:08, Reply)

I made 12 litres of mulled cider on Saturday night, it was excellent. I might make it every staurday

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:09, Reply)

I cooked a three bone rib of beef for 3 of us yesterday.
There is no meat left. It was, even if I say so myself, fucking NOM.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:20, Reply)

Really?
Christ I've been on the right old lash.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:39, Reply)

that one that used to do the weather would get it, the rest can get to fuck

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:06, Reply)

Gonz.
www.secretdj.com/
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:13, Reply)

Mix the porn up with your medical condition and call it "Loose Stools"

(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:36, Reply)

Alt: join in fucking what?
Altalt: haha you cunt
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:50, Reply)

AltAlt: you are a festering growth of vaginal yeast.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:54, Reply)

I wonder if you can make homebrew with that.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:59, Reply)

*bokes*

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:00, Reply)

You can:
toisennhauser.com/work/12/oktoberfest
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:01, Reply)

Oh dear :(

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:01, Reply)

Fucking hell.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:01, Reply)

45 year old yeast

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:05, Reply)

Ewww

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:37, Reply)

That's almost as bad as menstrual blood cookies.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:45, Reply)

I bet fucking Twilight fans invented those.
The thought has made me feel sick :(
( wanderlust, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:51, Reply)

Some kinds of feminists are just a bit strange.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:55, Reply)

I went to a poetry reading where someone had written a sign in their own menstrual blood.
It's not the 1970's. People don't do that kind of thing anymore.
( wanderlust, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:58, Reply)

IT FUCKING IS THE 70S
LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU LALALALALLA
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:00, Reply)

This is an invitation to write things in menstrual blood all over the house by the way.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:03, Reply)

Oh nice one, I'll be round about 8ish?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:05, Reply)

Yep, black pudding made with gash blood is much nicer.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:04, Reply)

Well, I don't think that it is too soon to declare this thread to be shit.
Sorry everyone.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 10:59, Reply)

No pressies for Auntie Tangles.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:06, Reply)

Alt: I think they usually involve a casino heist.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:01, Reply)

I'm really into film.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:02, Reply)

No-one's into that film.

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:06, Reply)

This is not a game of "who the fuck are you"....

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:07, Reply)

is that a game?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:08, Reply)

If it is Australia would probably beat us.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:24, Reply)

not these days
they are shit at cricket and we beat them in the olympic medal table, rugby is in the balance and football they are no where near us.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:25, Reply)

Well this is good

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:11, Reply)

Really is.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:13, Reply)

I went to an Osteopath this morning.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:13, Reply)

Is that Austrian for psychopath?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:16, Reply)

How was it?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:17, Reply)

What does this have to do with the interpersonal relationships of reindeer?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:23, Reply)

He damaged himself fucking a reindeer.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:24, Reply)

I think I may have knocked it up.
Looks like a second marriage is gonna be on the cards in the not too distant future.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:32, Reply)

It's pretty hard to say no to a Reindeer, they're very horny.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:33, Reply)

oh HO!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:36, Reply)

actually they are antlers snee snee

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:36, Reply)

Is the difference that one is bone and one is keratin?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:37, Reply)

Keratin Kev?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:38, Reply)

You know that - I know that - some SOMEONE HERE clearly does not.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:41, Reply)

so do you have bones or not?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:36, Reply)

I do.
My neck and back bones are quite stiff.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:37, Reply)

Bones are supposed to be stiff.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:38, Reply)

Mine are so stiff it's like I've got a permanent neck and back erection.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:38, Reply)

think about margeret thatcher and hit it with a spoon

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:39, Reply)

'and now it's only four foot four'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:42, Reply)

Alt: There'll be a twelve-sided die/dice/numberedthinig involved I bet
Altalt: HAHAHAHAH you think dis is da real Quaid? Cockwomble.
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:36, Reply)

I saw a translation of that to Japanese so it made sense, then back to English
It was wonderfully tragic. It was along the lines of "Rudolph had a red nose. No one liked him. Santa once found him useful."
EDIT: found it.
Rudolph had a shiny nose
no one liked him
he cried every night
then one Christmas it was dark
Santa decided Rudolph’s nose was convenient (literally it says convenient)
Rudolph was useful.

I sadly have the dreaded Bowie disease so I am doing very little other than occasionally falling over.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:41, Reply)

Hahaha that I like A LOT.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:45, Reply)

To clarify, I mean the Rudolph thing not your illness.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:45, Reply)

I like her illness
I think she has a sexy illness.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:50, Reply)

I have many sexy illnesses.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:50, Reply)

It just keeps getting better and better.
I keep forgetting and turning my head then feeling like I've been stuck in a tumble dryer.

Going oop narth tomorrow though, should be exciting.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:50, Reply)

Count yourself lucky
I can't currently turn my head to the left
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:52, Reply)

Hope you get better soon!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:55, Reply)

You too sweety!
xxxxxxxx
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 11:56, Reply)

I remember when offtopic was full of bile, before these new people ruined it with their vapid caring.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:05, Reply)

All the good people are gone, it's like /OT 1.0
Much more of this, and that Loon fellow will be back on here.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:06, Reply)

NEW THREAD!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Dec 2012, 12:07, Reply)